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Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2020
With every new belief,
you have to let something go

Each thought self-entitled
—to reap what it sows

(Villanova Pennsylvania: January, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2022
I spend my days
in celibacy unchosen
living the desperation
we share

Anguished in the knowledge
that needing you unbroken  
transcends the sentence
of this chair

I hear your words, I feel your touch
imprisoned by our love
and wish to free you from this pain
to meet again above

My memory holds each tryst endeared
your beauty most sublime
to relive as I stay in place
—virility confined  


(The New Room: July, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2022
Seventy years…
and what have you learned
Don’t give me facts…
what have you learned
Keep your opinions…
what have you learned
Look into my eyes
—what have you learned

(Dreamsleep: November, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
Is the truth even electable,
   redemption now a sin

The confessional a voting booth
  —where liars dwell within

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2018
Is the truth even electable
   redemption now a sin

The confessional a voting booth
  —where liars dwell within

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2024
Libby’s Retreat
                                      January, 2056


It was January 2056, and Rays membership to Libby’s Health & Romance Retreat was about to run out in just two more weeks.  Ray had been a member now for three years but lately had started to feel very empty every time he left Libby’s.  It was a feeling that he couldn’t quite explain and one that he had never felt before.

Libby’s was a franchised location of the large ‘Cymax Personal Health’ system.  It had been on the corner of Snyder avenue and 14th street for the past seven years.  Since the fatal STD Porex had been discovered over twenty years ago, free and organic *** was almost entirely a relic of the past.  Now almost all singles got their ****** gratification from spa’s and clubs like Libby’s. They found in the androids and simulators there something that was now far too dangerous to find with someone else.

Porex was both dangerous and deadly for two reasons.  There was no early detection, or screening, to see if you were infected until the disease was already at stage #3, and there was no cure or treatment once you were there.  At that point death came early — and with much pain attached.

Aids had been cured over twenty years ago, and those same scientists and laboratories were now working on a cure for Porex.  Unlike Aids, which started with the *** virus, Porex had no early warning signs.  It surfaced almost overnight and killed 100% of its victims within ninety days.

Free *** among humans was still being practiced by the adventuresome few, but it was literally a life or death enterprise. Neither party could know for sure if their partner was disease free or not.  Many times, if not most, the infected party never found out until it was too late.  

The only fail-safe method was *** between two virgins,
and then only between those two.  Many prominent families were using ****** consulting firms to determine if their prospective daughters qualified, but there was still no concrete way of telling if their male suitors had been celibate or not. Many young women had paid the ultimate price for believing what their ‘hormone raging’ boyfriends had said in a moment of passion.  In more cases than not, these men didn’t even know they had been infected — the signs always showing up too late.

Personal stimulation devices had been available for home use for many years but were boring in their one-dimensional ability to give pleasure.  Clubs like Libby’s had over 55 different devices that could take you to the promise-land and all for the cost of a car payment every month.  

Ray’s favorite device at Libby’s was Amanda.  Amanda was a life sized, full featured, android, and the one Ray used was sculpted to look and feel exactly like the supermodel Alexis Andrea.  In the dark, and under blind test studies, over 80% of the males tested could not tell the difference between Amanda and the real thing.  Many, literally fell in love (lust) during their first encounter.

Amanda never said no, never had a headache, and was always available.  She was 5’7’’ tall and came in all races and nationalities. She was the most expensive ‘release’ mechanism at the club so appointments were always necessary to book a session with her.  Amanda was busy twenty-four hours a day and could actually be booked for in-home use for twice the hourly rate.

Ray had recently met someone he liked at the Coffee and Cake Emporium downtown. Her name was Elizabeth, and Ray thought she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen.  Ray asked Elizabeth to play Cybernets one night, which was the virtual tennis rage that was sweeping the country.  Elizabeth said yes, and they walked together from the C & C Emporium to the Cybernets Room at Game-Central.  They had a great time together and scheduled a second date to play again.

Ray wondered what ‘real ***’ with Elizabeth would be like.  He was now having trouble going back to Libby’s, and his last two sessions with Amanda had been awkward and vacuous.  He kept seeing Elizabeth’s face on the head of the android and wondered what his grandfather would think if he could see him now.

Some Things Are Worth Dying For, Grandpa Had Often Said

Ray’s wrist implant went off one Tuesday afternoon. It was showing a ‘virtual’ of Elizabeth in her new bathing suit and sitting around the pool in her downtown modular building. Ray wondered why she had sent this to him. Could she be thinking the same things as me, he asked himself? For the rest of that day, Ray could neither work nor eat.  He was now obsessed with both the fantasy and the real possibility of having something that before seemed so forbidden. Elizabeth was now dominating not only his waking, but his sleeping thoughts too.

At 8 O’clock that evening, Ray video encrypted Elizabeth.  Video Encryption was as close to the real thing as technology had developed — creating a full scale and life-sized hologram of the two parties in three-dimensional form.  Elizabeth looked amazing!

                                Ray Was Falling In Love

Elizabeth told Ray that her office was shutting down for two weeks for cyber-regeneration and that she was thinking of going somewhere REAL.  The last two ‘virtual’ vacations she had been on had left her feeling empty and alone.  ‘Trans-Virtual Vacations’ was the largest company in this field. They allowed the visitor to experience any place on earth while in a dream-sleep state of consciousness.  They even had vacations to over 1500 fantasy locations, and all were available without ever leaving home.

Elizabeth said: ‘How about the Grand Canyon?’ Ray couldn’t believe his own ears. She was actually asking him if he would like to go along.  She then said that by booking a two-seater shuttle they could be there in less than an hour. They could still see the sun come up over the south rim tomorrow morning if they packed, and got to the sky-transport terminal, within the hour.

There was only one answer and Ray quickly said YES. Since he was already home, he packed in under five minutes, called the Inner-city Air Transport and was at the ‘Trans Shuttle Terminal’
in less than forty minutes.  Elizabeth was already there.  She was dressed in a blue taffeta shirt and slacks, and Ray thought he could see right through them as she moved through the waning light.

Elizabeth said she had booked a ‘Northern Star’ direct two passenger and was that all right with him?  Ray said: “Only if you drive.” These smaller two passenger direct shuttles were computer driven, but passenger monitored and controlled, with full override being available in case of emergency. Both Elizabeth and Ray had gone to civilian ‘flight’ school for certification and were both more than capable of getting to the ‘Canyon’ and back.

As they took off in a vertical lift, Ray asked Elizabeth where she would like to stay.  She said the ‘Old Lodge’ still had 7 rooms and they were holding two on the second floor overlooking the South Rim for them. Two ? Ray couldn’t help but wonder, as he heard himself repeating her words to him again.  As they flew over the eastern rim they slowed and dropped in elevation.  The Canyon never failed to inspire, no matter what technology its pilgrims took to arrive.  The panorama was breathtaking as they descended into Desert View.  The lodge was visible in the distance, and Elizabeth suggested after docking that they walk the final two miles.

The Lodge stood timeless and defiant against what the modern world had now become.  It had remained identical to its 19th Century design and harkened the visitor back to a time when life was more balanced and when most things were real.  Modern life had tried to remove all of the trials and challenges of previous generations while forgetting that good and bad would always be two dependent halves of the same whole.

Elizabeth and Ray entered through the large double front doors and walked across the immense lobby to the front desk.  Elizabeth gave the clerk their Transit I.D.’s and said she had booked two rooms earlier in the day.  The clerk said: “The two adjoining rooms that look out on the South Rim, right miss?” Elizabeth said yes, and then looked toward Ray and wryly smiled.

As a throwback to an earlier time, a live bellhop came and carried their two small bags upstairs to the second floor.  The view from Ray’s corner room was spectacular. Looking out the large canyon facing window, he realized that Elizabeth had taken the lesser room for herself.  As Ray was becoming transfixed, watching the remaining light emptying out of the canyon, he heard a knock on his door.  It was not coming from the outside hall but from the interior door that connected to the adjoining room — Elizabeth’s room!


Ray walked toward the door with a mixture of trepidation and delight. As he opened it, there in front of him was the most heavenly sight he had ever seen.  Elizabeth was standing before him and the taffeta was now gone. She was standing beneath the doorway that connected her room to his,  

               And She Was Standing In The Doorway Naked

Ray took a deep breath as he attempted to speak.  Elizabeth slowly shook her head and stepped toward him as she put her right index finger to his lips. Not now she said, as she wrapped her arms around him.  I’m a ****** Ray, so you have nothing to worry about.  I love you and can no longer bear the thought of never feeling you inside me.  

As Ray carried Elizabeth to his bed, he realized for the first time that life was ultimately good. What had been troubling him for all those years had only been a warning and a preparation for what was to come.  Ray thought to himself about love, real love, and the chance that Elizabeth had been willing to take.  He then smiled to himself, knowing that the inner voice that had been speaking to him for all those years had been telling the truth …

                                For Ray Was A ****** Too

In two more weeks, Rays membership card to Libby’s would
expire never to be reactivated.  The sterile and impersonal pleasure industry had been beaten by the timeless power of human love.
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2019
With each tick of the second hand
  the immeasurable on trial

Imagination deposed
  all parameters set free

The Poets acquitted
  the logicians suicidal

All reference and syntax
  —imploding at light speed

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2018
Giving form to the structure
—my words are set free

(Villanova Pennsylvania: May, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
Words, once you free them
  —no longer slave to your name

(Villanova Pennsylvania: From a longer Poem- Fall 2015)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2022
The present is in your future,
the present in your past
The present a sacred mystery,
its moment to unmask
The present is in your memory,
the present in your dreams
The present neither begins nor ends
—eternity set free

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2019
Community college intellect,
Ivy League soul

Questions lie subservient
—feelings in control

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
A strange thing happens
  once you’re as old as your heroes

The mystery less enchanting,
  the romance nearly gone

A stranger thing happens
  when you outlive your heroes

The nuances shouting boldly
   —permission now won

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2018
Politics and Religion…
  nothing could be further from the truth

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2014)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2018
Journalistic integrity…
  give me a break

Your lies are on fire
  there’s hell at the gate

Journalistic integrity
  the wages of sin

All truth has been twisted
  your speech has worn thin

Journalistic integrity
  oxymoron disclosed

Two words now in conflict
  their corruption exposed

Journalistic integrity
  death by your own hand

All blame you relinquish
  —your lies to withstand

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
Journalistic integrity…
  give me a break

Your lies are on fire,
  there’s hell at the gate

Journalistic integrity,
  the wages of sin

All truth has been twisted,
  your speech has worn thin

Journalistic integrity,
  oxymoron disclosed

Two words now in conflict,
  their corruption exposed

Journalistic integrity,
  death by your own hand

All blame you relinquish
  —your lies to withstand

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2019
You can wish and hope for a hundred years,
  or play the game a day at a time

You can focus on what’s at the end of the road,
  or squeeze three nickels from your very last dime

You can pray for still more than some others might have,
  or be thankful for what lies at your feet

You can love in the face of jealousy and hate
   —or start downward on hell’s one-way street

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
You can wish and hope for a hundred years,
  or play the game a day at a time

You can focus on what’s at the end of the road,
  or squeeze three nickels from your very last dime

You can pray for still more than some others might have,
  or be thankful for what lies at your feet

You can love in the face of jealousy and hate
   —or start downward on hell’s one-way street

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2017
Not free, not wise, not kind, not loved,
  and tethered to the past

Unwilling to admit the truth,
  he met his match at last

His Muse had warned time and again,
  a reckoning was near

His eyes to close, his voice to mute,
  beyond his greatest fear

Unsung, unwanted, lost, alone,
  his nights became his days

His introduction to regret,
  the price all sinners pay

If just one chance to then go back,
  and take that other road

The dark would pass, the light return,
  and end his life below

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2019
Not free, not wise, not kind, not loved,
and tethered to the past

Unwilling to admit the truth,
he met his match at last

His Muse had warned time and again,
a reckoning was near

His eyes to close, his voice to mute,
beyond his greatest fear

Unsung, unwanted, lost, alone,
his nights became his days

His abrogation to regret,
the price all sinners pay

If just one chance to then go back,
and take that other road

The dark would pass, the light return
—and end his life below

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2019
Religion levels the playing field,
money replaced by hope

For those destitute with hills to climb
salvation—heaven’s rope

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2019)
When a man
has nothing
The easiest thing to sell him
— is a dream

(Dreamsleep: February, 2025)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2020
Reaching down or
reaching up

Arms extended
—hearts to touch

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2018
Up or down
  forward or back

Polarity ends
  in a panic attack

Start, stop
  the stillness portends

The middle a wasteland
  lost years of pretend

Before or after
  in front or behind

Timing entraps
  with the devil’s design

Salvation, damnation
  souls to contend

To live or to die
  —to start or to end

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2018
Does your good
  outweigh the bad

Is the balance
  happy or sad

Is your intention
  right or wrong

Does your prayer
  turn into song

Does the blame
  weigh down your heart

Can your light
  outshine the dark

Can the joy
  exceed the pain

Does one word
  your soul reclaim

Will His grace
  forgive your sins

Will new life or death
  —begin

(Villanova Pennsylvania: September, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2023
Man is predestined
to destroy his world
Consciously damning
‘free choice’ unfurled

An apex predator
upon himself
No rhyme or reason
or logic dealt

Self-destruction
his stock in trade
His nature foreign
to all else made

Killing his brothers
killing his sons
Shakespeare prescient
of what’s to come

Time irreverent
he never learns
What sets him free
his folly spurns

The clock is running
the hour late
His words now toxic
and filled with hate

And when it’s over
but one thing changed
A new world order
—with life reclaimed

(Bryn Mawr College: June, 2023)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2023
Trapped in the moment
escaping with rhyme
Words to my rescue
—time after time

(Dreamsleep: February, 2023)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2021
Memory left drowning
betwixt and beyond
floating discarded
on yesterday’s pond

The future is calling
in voices distressed
reservoirs draining
tomorrow beset

The bridge crossing over
these waters is rough
its toll but the present
time never enough

The turnstile upon you,
its arm is still down
the cost what you’re leaving
its promise unsound

But once set in motion,
there’s no turning back
allusion receding
with blood in its tracks

All hail to the moment,
the instant supreme
whose motion internal
—all else but a dream

(Dreamsleep: October, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2019
Borrow someone else’s truth…
but there’s one you need to own

Whose lease runs out as time grows short
—life’s contract yours alone

(Villanova Pennsylvania: January, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2021
After the diagnosis,
each moment a dream
of years and then months
and days in between

After the surgery,
the dream became real
time again captured
—the sentence repealed

(The New Room: December, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
Crossing over,
  I thought it’d be different

Crossing over,
  I thought things would change

Crossing over,
  I thought I’d be better

Crossing over,
  I fought through the rain

Now looking back,
  I see demurely

Now looking back,
  I see through the fog

Now looking back,
  I see more clearly

Now looking back
  —through life’s epilogue

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2018
To love but not like the one you’re with
  —life’s greatest curse of all

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2018
To be loved but not liked…
  the greatest curse of all


With joy in abeyance
  so near—yet so far


(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2019
The tragedy of us
is that we couldn’t overcome
ourselves

To become who
we were meant to be
—sharing the greatest gift of all

(Dreamsleep: July, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2017
I didn’t ask to be alone,
  but I’ve always been alone

Living within the shadows,
  that in time became my home

I never asked to be alone,
  but I’ve always been alone

Each day a drifting footprint,
  among endless stepping stones

I didn’t ask to be alone,
  but I’ve always been alone

Each night a stark reminder
  of a dream that’s never shown

I never asked to be alone,
  but I’ve always been alone

The ending now upon me
—life's promise still unknown

(Villanova Pennsylvania: November, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2018
Was that dollar Sunday morning
  a twenty Saturday night

Is that empty bottle you can barely see
  the excuse that started the fight

Is that torn and tattered jacket
  what was once your Sunday best

Is your life worth more than nineteen dollars
   eyes blackened—never to rest

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2019
As natural and necessary
  as breathing
    —I write

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2022
Waiting for life to come to me,
the clock ticked down to one

With barely but a second left,
my tendency to run

With nothing left but one last tick,
all motion seemed to stop

Perspective changed, then rearranged,
a lifetime on the spot

My eyes won’t blink, the fear too great,
of staying closed for good

As from a distant galaxy,
I finally understood

All life had boiled down to this,
eternity defined

When everything that ever was,
together crossed my mind

I left the past and future mired,
to breed and then deceive

And took this present life unbound
—unto my soul reprieved

(The New Room: May, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2020
Phrases string together,
letters front to back

Birds of the same feather,
in each other’s tracks

Marching toward transcendence,
words reformed and strong

Flocking into unison
—flying into song

(Villanova Pennsylvania: September, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2016
The words dropped from my hand to
  the pen unbroken,
   —as light in a bend

(West Philadelphia, February, 1973)
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2024
A Poet is not like other writers …
all narrative be ******

Charging and fusing each word with a spark
redundancy to ban

Poets and Novelists both drawn to the fire
their kindling looks the same

The differences clear when striking a match
— poetic verse rising in flames

(Dreamsleep: January, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2019
To be quiet with your friends
  and silent with your foes

Creates a thunderous quiescence
  which envelopes your soul

Your enemy weakening
  as truth starts to rain

His darkness expelled
   —by lightning proclaimed

(Train From Virginia: April, 2015)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2024
Innocent tonight
— guilt waits with the dawn

(Dreamsleep: February, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2020
Creativity…
undemocratic

Tyrants of insight,
breaking new ground

Vision on fire,
effigy’s burning

Painting’s unframed
—all muses set free

(The New Room: November, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2017
Truth shows no favorites,
  all lies judged the same

Freedom or prison
—its light or its chains

(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2019
Lay your feelings out there,
  put them on the line

Send your fear back down to hell,
  forever to remind

Evil in submission,
  darkness wrapped in fright

The devil muted with your words
  —prisoner of the light

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2023
I think like a buddhist
but pray like a nun

I see like the mountain
but reach like the sun

I stand like Gibraltar
but rage like the sea

And love like a child
—reborn unto Thee

(First Book Of Prayers: May, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2022
I think like a Buddhist,
but pray like a nun

I see like the mountain,
but reach like the sun

I stand like Gibraltar,
but rage like the sea

And love like a child
—reborn unto Thee

(1st Book Of Prayers: May, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2017
I think like a Buddhist,
  but pray like a nun

I see like the mountain,
  but reach like the sun

I stand like Gibraltar,
  but rage like the sea

And love like a child,
  reborn unto thee

(Villanova Pennsylvania: May, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2019
Fighting his very nature,
conflict raging inside him again

Feelings demand what thoughts can’t command
—neither enemy nor friend

(Dreamsleep: September, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2020
Caught within the membranes
of a lost tomorrow,

time stood still

No sound, no sight, no
fresh vibration,

as eternity waits

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2020)
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