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Left To Wander

Confusion’s underbelly
frustration’s embryo
Orphaned seeds of black and white
spread where nothing grows
Choices wander celibate
new pregnancy unfound
Up or down left to right
— dubiety impounds

(The New Room: February, 2024)

Incognito

Thinking the worst
of people
life has cast a pall

To cover my
intentions
— and camouflage the fall

(Dreamsdleep: February, 2024)


Warring Words

Poets
are the bravest  
writers …
you know who you are

Scattered
among
the Johnny Come Latelys
battered up and scarred

Each word
proffered
born of pain
raised in discontent

Dying once
to live again
unwilling
— to relent

(Dreamsleep: February, 2024)


Winning

First and foremost
success is an
entrepreneurial venture
— not a management exercise

(To Dartmouth Students: January, 2012)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2020
****** the sky of its luster,
a new darkness began to imbue

Draining the ocean—taking its salt,
a pillar for Edith renewed

Shearing the top off the mountain,
its crater to hemorrhage and bleed

Stealing the promise from every hope
all faith left to weather—unfreed

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2019
The truth runs thin
   along the borderline

Where voices lie weary
   and valleys grow deep

The truth runs distant
   along the borderline

Where choices are frozen
   —new dreams left to weep

(Las Vegas Nevada: February, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2019
Charging into the waves,
the wind at my back

The horizon clear
—its truth left unsaid

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2019
Do you see yourself inside your dream,
or chasing close behind

Is your love unquestioned, given free,
or bartered, contract signed

Are your lyrics empty without applause,
audience on the run

Will the future ransom a past still lost
—the moment left unsung

(Villanova Pennsylvania: November, 2019)
Poetry
secured in beauty …
carved high in a tree
Branches
spread and offer cover
of your history
Winter
comes and bares the promise
Spring will shade anew
Seasons
in the bark awaiting
— progeny to view

(Dreamsleep: February, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2018
Did the choices you made
  scatter bodies behind you

Did you block out the light
  leaving others in the cold          

Did you take your half
  out of eternity’s middle

Did the promises you made
—become the legacy you sold

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2019
Borrow from the least,
  but steal from the best

The larceny of endowment
  —your legacy’s quest

(Villanova Pennsylvania: May, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2018
On a battlefield lined
  with the blood of dead letters
I slay the monsters of uncertainty
   —and their legacy of fear

(Villanova Pennsylvania: November, 2013)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2019
Would you rather die
than be embarrassed

Rather destitute
than shamed

Would you rather set your heart on fire,
than barter out your name

Does your reputation matter,
will your legacy endear

Does what others think,
release the pain

That haunts
—and drives your fear

(Villanova Pennsylvania: September, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2019
Like wine uncorked to breathe the air,
my heart and mind become

The richness of this life I’ve lived,
all fortune on the run

Not looking back, but looking in,
the key to feelings past

Where hides a treasure, memory locked
—its legacy recast

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2021
“Only those things not made less by division
—are to be inherited”

(The New Room: February, 2021)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2020
Will you be the hero
within your own story

Will you marry the present,
dating the future and past

Will your legacy document
your truest intention

Or falsely imply
words abandoned—unheard

(H.U.P. May, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2017
From deep in the shadows of Tin Pan Alley,
the Sage called out my name

With a voice that haunted and eyes concealed,
  he made his only claim

                            Saying…

“Abuse yourself if you must My Son,
  but you are never to mistreat your words

Untainted they connect your feelings and thoughts,
—your true legacy still unheard”

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
Literary Achilles
  writer of the sword

Legions cry
  chariots fly

—blood in every word

(Dallas Texas: June, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2020
Its history was written
in tragedy

The period to the last sentence
—was death

(The New Room: November, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2020
If only my wishes
had come to me earlier

Much less than I settled for
—still more than I deserved

(Dreamsleep: May, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
The deeper the pond
  the calmer the water

The older the wine
  the richer the flavor

The longer the gaze
  the sharper the picture

The fewer the words
   —less risk of conjecture

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2019
The deeper the pond,
  the calmer the water

The older the wine,
  the richer the flavor

The longer the gaze,
  the sharper the picture

The fewer the words
   —less risk of conjecture

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2016
The deeper the pond,
  the clearer the water

The older the wine,
  the richer the flavor

The longer the gaze,
  the sharper the picture

The fewer the words,
—less risk of conjecture

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2020
The rock,
stands against the wind
in centuries old calm

Counting the years until
our baptism,
sinking deeper still

Stoic to tell
lest we forget, engraved
on a hill of blinding sun

Of barefoot
painted dancers,
and children—future come

(Mesa Verde Colorado: October, 1976)
Make sure you know
what you’re trying to say

But let readers figure it out
— for themselves

(Dreamsleep: January, 2024)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2018
How important is the music
  to your verse

How important is the blood
  in your veins

How important is the picture
  to the words

How important…
  let me ask you once again

(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2020
Changing the future—changing the past,
a north south reprimand


Each word rewritten—time bespoke,
the present close at hand

(Dreamsleep: November, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Jan 2020
With every new belief,
you have to let something go

Each thought self-entitled
—to reap what it sows

(Villanova Pennsylvania: January, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2023
Is time but a reference
to prey and confound

(while)

In memory eternal
—enlightenment found

(Dreamsleep: February, 2023)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2023
You can’t beat fate
with the stars in alignment
You can’t beat fate
all your ducks in a row
You can’t beat fate
with your words in confinement
You can’t beat fate
—till you let it all go

(Dreamsleep: March, 2023)
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2022
I spend my days
in celibacy unchosen
living the desperation
we share

Anguished in the knowledge
that needing you unbroken  
transcends the sentence
of this chair

I hear your words, I feel your touch
imprisoned by our love
and wish to free you from this pain
to meet again above

My memory holds each tryst endeared
your beauty most sublime
to relive as I stay in place
—virility confined  


(The New Room: July, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Nov 2022
Seventy years…
and what have you learned
Don’t give me facts…
what have you learned
Keep your opinions…
what have you learned
Look into my eyes
—what have you learned

(Dreamsleep: November, 2022)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2018
Is the truth even electable
   redemption now a sin

The confessional a voting booth
  —where liars dwell within

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
Is the truth even electable,
   redemption now a sin

The confessional a voting booth
  —where liars dwell within

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Libby’s Retreat
                                      January, 2056


It was January 2056, and Rays membership to Libby’s Health & Romance Retreat was about to run out in just two more weeks.  Ray had been a member now for three years but lately had started to feel very empty every time he left Libby’s.  It was a feeling that he couldn’t quite explain and one that he had never felt before.

Libby’s was a franchised location of the large ‘Cymax Personal Health’ system.  It had been on the corner of Snyder avenue and 14th street for the past seven years.  Since the fatal STD Porex had been discovered over twenty years ago, free and organic *** was almost entirely a relic of the past.  Now almost all singles got their ****** gratification from spa’s and clubs like Libby’s. They found in the androids and simulators there something that was now far too dangerous to find with someone else.

Porex was both dangerous and deadly for two reasons.  There was no early detection, or screening, to see if you were infected until the disease was already at stage #3, and there was no cure or treatment once you were there.  At that point death came early — and with much pain attached.

Aids had been cured over twenty years ago, and those same scientists and laboratories were now working on a cure for Porex.  Unlike Aids, which started with the *** virus, Porex had no early warning signs.  It surfaced almost overnight and killed 100% of its victims within ninety days.

Free *** among humans was still being practiced by the adventuresome few, but it was literally a life or death enterprise. Neither party could know for sure if their partner was disease free or not.  Many times, if not most, the infected party never found out until it was too late.  

The only fail-safe method was *** between two virgins,
and then only between those two.  Many prominent families were using ****** consulting firms to determine if their prospective daughters qualified, but there was still no concrete way of telling if their male suitors had been celibate or not. Many young women had paid the ultimate price for believing what their ‘hormone raging’ boyfriends had said in a moment of passion.  In more cases than not, these men didn’t even know they had been infected — the signs always showing up too late.

Personal stimulation devices had been available for home use for many years but were boring in their one-dimensional ability to give pleasure.  Clubs like Libby’s had over 55 different devices that could take you to the promise-land and all for the cost of a car payment every month.  

Ray’s favorite device at Libby’s was Amanda.  Amanda was a life sized, full featured, android, and the one Ray used was sculpted to look and feel exactly like the supermodel Alexis Andrea.  In the dark, and under blind test studies, over 80% of the males tested could not tell the difference between Amanda and the real thing.  Many, literally fell in love (lust) during their first encounter.

Amanda never said no, never had a headache, and was always available.  She was 5’7’’ tall and came in all races and nationalities. She was the most expensive ‘release’ mechanism at the club so appointments were always necessary to book a session with her.  Amanda was busy twenty-four hours a day and could actually be booked for in-home use for twice the hourly rate.

Ray had recently met someone he liked at the Coffee and Cake Emporium downtown. Her name was Elizabeth, and Ray thought she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen.  Ray asked Elizabeth to play Cybernets one night, which was the virtual tennis rage that was sweeping the country.  Elizabeth said yes, and they walked together from the C & C Emporium to the Cybernets Room at Game-Central.  They had a great time together and scheduled a second date to play again.

Ray wondered what ‘real ***’ with Elizabeth would be like.  He was now having trouble going back to Libby’s, and his last two sessions with Amanda had been awkward and vacuous.  He kept seeing Elizabeth’s face on the head of the android and wondered what his grandfather would think if he could see him now.

Some Things Are Worth Dying For, Grandpa Had Often Said

Ray’s wrist implant went off one Tuesday afternoon. It was showing a ‘virtual’ of Elizabeth in her new bathing suit and sitting around the pool in her downtown modular building. Ray wondered why she had sent this to him. Could she be thinking the same things as me, he asked himself? For the rest of that day, Ray could neither work nor eat.  He was now obsessed with both the fantasy and the real possibility of having something that before seemed so forbidden. Elizabeth was now dominating not only his waking, but his sleeping thoughts too.

At 8 O’clock that evening, Ray video encrypted Elizabeth.  Video Encryption was as close to the real thing as technology had developed — creating a full scale and life-sized hologram of the two parties in three-dimensional form.  Elizabeth looked amazing!

                                Ray Was Falling In Love

Elizabeth told Ray that her office was shutting down for two weeks for cyber-regeneration and that she was thinking of going somewhere REAL.  The last two ‘virtual’ vacations she had been on had left her feeling empty and alone.  ‘Trans-Virtual Vacations’ was the largest company in this field. They allowed the visitor to experience any place on earth while in a dream-sleep state of consciousness.  They even had vacations to over 1500 fantasy locations, and all were available without ever leaving home.

Elizabeth said: ‘How about the Grand Canyon?’ Ray couldn’t believe his own ears. She was actually asking him if he would like to go along.  She then said that by booking a two-seater shuttle they could be there in less than an hour. They could still see the sun come up over the south rim tomorrow morning if they packed, and got to the sky-transport terminal, within the hour.

There was only one answer and Ray quickly said YES. Since he was already home, he packed in under five minutes, called the Inner-city Air Transport and was at the ‘Trans Shuttle Terminal’
in less than forty minutes.  Elizabeth was already there.  She was dressed in a blue taffeta shirt and slacks, and Ray thought he could see right through them as she moved through the waning light.

Elizabeth said she had booked a ‘Northern Star’ direct two passenger and was that all right with him?  Ray said: “Only if you drive.” These smaller two passenger direct shuttles were computer driven, but passenger monitored and controlled, with full override being available in case of emergency. Both Elizabeth and Ray had gone to civilian ‘flight’ school for certification and were both more than capable of getting to the ‘Canyon’ and back.

As they took off in a vertical lift, Ray asked Elizabeth where she would like to stay.  She said the ‘Old Lodge’ still had 7 rooms and they were holding two on the second floor overlooking the South Rim for them. Two ? Ray couldn’t help but wonder, as he heard himself repeating her words to him again.  As they flew over the eastern rim they slowed and dropped in elevation.  The Canyon never failed to inspire, no matter what technology its pilgrims took to arrive.  The panorama was breathtaking as they descended into Desert View.  The lodge was visible in the distance, and Elizabeth suggested after docking that they walk the final two miles.

The Lodge stood timeless and defiant against what the modern world had now become.  It had remained identical to its 19th Century design and harkened the visitor back to a time when life was more balanced and when most things were real.  Modern life had tried to remove all of the trials and challenges of previous generations while forgetting that good and bad would always be two dependent halves of the same whole.

Elizabeth and Ray entered through the large double front doors and walked across the immense lobby to the front desk.  Elizabeth gave the clerk their Transit I.D.’s and said she had booked two rooms earlier in the day.  The clerk said: “The two adjoining rooms that look out on the South Rim, right miss?” Elizabeth said yes, and then looked toward Ray and wryly smiled.

As a throwback to an earlier time, a live bellhop came and carried their two small bags upstairs to the second floor.  The view from Ray’s corner room was spectacular. Looking out the large canyon facing window, he realized that Elizabeth had taken the lesser room for herself.  As Ray was becoming transfixed, watching the remaining light emptying out of the canyon, he heard a knock on his door.  It was not coming from the outside hall but from the interior door that connected to the adjoining room — Elizabeth’s room!


Ray walked toward the door with a mixture of trepidation and delight. As he opened it, there in front of him was the most heavenly sight he had ever seen.  Elizabeth was standing before him and the taffeta was now gone. She was standing beneath the doorway that connected her room to his,  

               And She Was Standing In The Doorway Naked

Ray took a deep breath as he attempted to speak.  Elizabeth slowly shook her head and stepped toward him as she put her right index finger to his lips. Not now she said, as she wrapped her arms around him.  I’m a ****** Ray, so you have nothing to worry about.  I love you and can no longer bear the thought of never feeling you inside me.  

As Ray carried Elizabeth to his bed, he realized for the first time that life was ultimately good. What had been troubling him for all those years had only been a warning and a preparation for what was to come.  Ray thought to himself about love, real love, and the chance that Elizabeth had been willing to take.  He then smiled to himself, knowing that the inner voice that had been speaking to him for all those years had been telling the truth …

                                For Ray Was A ****** Too

In two more weeks, Rays membership card to Libby’s would
expire never to be reactivated.  The sterile and impersonal pleasure industry had been beaten by the timeless power of human love.
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2019
With each tick of the second hand
  the immeasurable on trial

Imagination deposed
  all parameters set free

The Poets acquitted
  the logicians suicidal

All reference and syntax
  —imploding at light speed

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2018
Giving form to the structure
—my words are set free

(Villanova Pennsylvania: May, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
Words, once you free them
  —no longer slave to your name

(Villanova Pennsylvania: From a longer Poem- Fall 2015)
Kurt Philip Behm May 2022
The present is in your future,
the present in your past
The present a sacred mystery,
its moment to unmask
The present is in your memory,
the present in your dreams
The present neither begins nor ends
—eternity set free

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2019
Community college intellect,
Ivy League soul

Questions lie subservient
—feelings in control

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
A strange thing happens
  once you’re as old as your heroes

The mystery less enchanting,
  the romance nearly gone

A stranger thing happens
  when you outlive your heroes

The nuances shouting boldly
   —permission now won

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Oct 2018
Politics and Religion…
  nothing could be further from the truth

(Villanova Pennsylvania: April, 2014)
Kurt Philip Behm Apr 2019
Journalistic integrity…
  give me a break

Your lies are on fire,
  there’s hell at the gate

Journalistic integrity,
  the wages of sin

All truth has been twisted,
  your speech has worn thin

Journalistic integrity,
  oxymoron disclosed

Two words now in conflict,
  their corruption exposed

Journalistic integrity,
  death by your own hand

All blame you relinquish
  —your lies to withstand

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2018
Journalistic integrity…
  give me a break

Your lies are on fire
  there’s hell at the gate

Journalistic integrity
  the wages of sin

All truth has been twisted
  your speech has worn thin

Journalistic integrity
  oxymoron disclosed

Two words now in conflict
  their corruption exposed

Journalistic integrity
  death by your own hand

All blame you relinquish
  —your lies to withstand

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Feb 2019
You can wish and hope for a hundred years,
  or play the game a day at a time

You can focus on what’s at the end of the road,
  or squeeze three nickels from your very last dime

You can pray for still more than some others might have,
  or be thankful for what lies at your feet

You can love in the face of jealousy and hate
   —or start downward on hell’s one-way street

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2018
You can wish and hope for a hundred years,
  or play the game a day at a time

You can focus on what’s at the end of the road,
  or squeeze three nickels from your very last dime

You can pray for still more than some others might have,
  or be thankful for what lies at your feet

You can love in the face of jealousy and hate
   —or start downward on hell’s one-way street

(Villanova Pennsylvania: February, 2016)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2019
Not free, not wise, not kind, not loved,
and tethered to the past

Unwilling to admit the truth,
he met his match at last

His Muse had warned time and again,
a reckoning was near

His eyes to close, his voice to mute,
beyond his greatest fear

Unsung, unwanted, lost, alone,
his nights became his days

His abrogation to regret,
the price all sinners pay

If just one chance to then go back,
and take that other road

The dark would pass, the light return
—and end his life below

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Mar 2017
Not free, not wise, not kind, not loved,
  and tethered to the past

Unwilling to admit the truth,
  he met his match at last

His Muse had warned time and again,
  a reckoning was near

His eyes to close, his voice to mute,
  beyond his greatest fear

Unsung, unwanted, lost, alone,
  his nights became his days

His introduction to regret,
  the price all sinners pay

If just one chance to then go back,
  and take that other road

The dark would pass, the light return,
  and end his life below

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2017)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2020
Reaching down or
reaching up

Arms extended
—hearts to touch

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2020)
Kurt Philip Behm Dec 2019
Religion levels the playing field,
money replaced by hope

For those destitute with hills to climb
salvation—heaven’s rope

(Villanova Pennsylvania: December, 2019)
Kurt Philip Behm Aug 2018
Up or down
  forward or back

Polarity ends
  in a panic attack

Start, stop
  the stillness portends

The middle a wasteland
  lost years of pretend

Before or after
  in front or behind

Timing entraps
  with the devil’s design

Salvation, damnation
  souls to contend

To live or to die
  —to start or to end

(Villanova Pennsylvania: August, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Sep 2018
Does your good
  outweigh the bad

Is the balance
  happy or sad

Is your intention
  right or wrong

Does your prayer
  turn into song

Does the blame
  weigh down your heart

Can your light
  outshine the dark

Can the joy
  exceed the pain

Does one word
  your soul reclaim

Will His grace
  forgive your sins

Will new life or death
  —begin

(Villanova Pennsylvania: September, 2018)
Kurt Philip Behm Jun 2023
Man is predestined
to destroy his world
Consciously damning
‘free choice’ unfurled

An apex predator
upon himself
No rhyme or reason
or logic dealt

Self-destruction
his stock in trade
His nature foreign
to all else made

Killing his brothers
killing his sons
Shakespeare prescient
of what’s to come

Time irreverent
he never learns
What sets him free
his folly spurns

The clock is running
the hour late
His words now toxic
and filled with hate

And when it’s over
but one thing changed
A new world order
—with life reclaimed

(Bryn Mawr College: June, 2023)
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