Kimmy-Nichole: Poems

548 · Jun 2010

Please

Kimmy-Nichole Jun 2010

Please

Respect and Regret
Neglect to forget
pain is hurt
strength is grown
never regret
getting hurt
its all part of the plan

544 · Feb 2012

Frames

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

Frames

the
presense of a person
is it psychosis,
dealt by the doses?
trembling on the inside
all happy on the outside
a mask never to be revealed
except through a radio wave
funny how the real me
is coming to surface

534 · Feb 2012

BA degree

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

BA degree

ill get it ill get there
they already have it
debt free
worry free
a walk in the park a mere fun experience
i am stressed and broke
working harder than ever to make money
forget what others have
i am my own support system
hate and jealousy are drugs of the demon
faith and a dream hope and the future
its all i have
its all i need
ill get where i need to be
ill get what i want.

531 · Jul 2010

I never

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

I never

wanted anyone to hurt for me
to feel what i feel
to love me so much they feel pain
i have never wanted that
to let yourself in
was my fault
i let you in
despite how much i restrained
i gave in
and now you hurt
i never meant too.

526 · Jul 2010

Being Good

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

Being Good

GOES
hand in hand
with being bad.
Living a GOOD life
will follow from
living a toxicly
hazardous life.

519 · Mar 2012

Baby, Tis Love

Kimmy-Nichole Mar 2012

Baby, Tis Love

its an obsession,
with you every day
and all i still want is you;
no one gets it but my heart
i feel it beat to you,
your my boyfriend,
my best friend,
maybe it is fast
i wont slow down,
this is different,
for once this is real.
i think i love you; yes i love you-
just you, though.
i dont need anything else
no one else will do,
i wont have anyone else,
all i need and all i want
is you

516 · Jun 2010

This Girl.

Kimmy-Nichole Jun 2010

This Girl.

It is hard to explain
Almost impossible
Im destined to find
Something more
I know how
Its a process you see
Everything will be simple
crisp clear clean
salty as the deep blue sea
I will find me.
Just you wait and see.

514 · Jul 2010

our tomorow

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

our tomorow

anticipating this big step
eager to start
i know the distance between us
wont intertwine
you will be calm and collected
ill be at piece with my mind
i wont look back at the
what was left behind
ill sit and smile
and anticipate our tomorow.

514 · Apr 2011

the silver lining.

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

the silver lining.

lazy and lathargic
**** thats how i hated being
(yet its my hobby so it seems)
oh fancy me,
stop the show and drop the act.
slender or thick,
drop dead or barely at a six,
I promise internally emotionally and physically -
Ill be okay; and the harder It gets the stronger i become.

510 · Apr 2011

once twice three times I'm sorry

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

once twice three times I'm sorry

my situation as of present day:

.Finally. It could still be.
I wanted to be devoted
simply yours and only yours,
I was in love.
so self absorbed in your skin
I wish I was in your soul
lost in your eyes
with every blink of your b eautiful blues
I see what you see,
The life you and I used to talk about.

510 · Sep 2011

& Im slipping in between

Kimmy-Nichole Sep 2011

& Im slipping in between

For ever I wanted,
for all i loved
is all I lost.
No gain other than growing up-
I'd never been so lost
or so scared
but alone i stood;
dreaming of us
dreaming of how i longed just to be home .

I am sure

To be continued..

510 · Aug 2010

Getting By

Kimmy-Nichole Aug 2010

Getting By

Sunset and Sunrise
No uncertainty-
Just a simple pure Energy;
Amongst us All, Beaneath the Ether, Over the horizon and throughout the hills-
Here I am comfortably as one
With myself.

505 · Mar 2011

The New Start

Kimmy-Nichole Mar 2011

The New Start

a new town
I am scared and want to turn around
I am looking back-
A major fear, I am on a new track

What is tomorow to bring?
Im in the dark
After a deep breath in
And a sigh of relief

Im on a new Chapter
Of my new start.

502 · Feb 2012

Memorial Day

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

Memorial Day

what a day,
the first memorial day spent away.
I think and drink-
wonder why Im here again.
lurking in my own dark apartment;
thinking about the place I dream to be,
the city i hated so hard,
yet im yearning for the dirtyness.
the memories
the conversations,
the one who meant the world to me.
Life is certainly not anything it used to be.

502 · Apr 2011

the island part 2

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

the island part 2

please excuse the lack of capitalization
dreaming
i need to sleep
i know i do
i need to eat
i need advice
i need my old life back
minus the problems with my parents
and a different residence obviously near

501 · Apr 2011

random draft

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

random draft

here I am
Ive made it
to some degree
I am proud
still rather loud
despite the disgust
the unhappiness
the sorrow and the toxicness
that once filled my life
just as much as it filled the overpopulated air,
I am able to walk tall and proud

For this is my time
for once in my life

500 · Apr 2011

the silver lining.

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

the silver lining.

lazy and lathargic
**** thats how i hated being
(yet its my hobby so it seems)
oh fancy me,
stop the show and drop the act.
slender or thick,
drop dead or barely at a six,
I promise internally emotionally and physically -
Ill be okay; and the harder It gets the stronger i become.

498 · Aug 2010

Beautiful Sense of Ease

Kimmy-Nichole Aug 2010

Beautiful Sense of Ease

You are what the world wants-
               as a matter of fact
Your all I want,
                 & Need
                     & Crave
           & Breathe
                 You are simply
A beautiful sense of calmness
A measure of unconditional ease
           The simpleness in life
The sparkling stars on a clear night
A cool summer breeze-

I love you
More than I could explain
My heart gets ravished with pain -
Every time your heart Is not near,

There is no one to blame
Life is not a game
For it it wore -
I would put it on pause
not for a second
nor for a minute
But for the rest of my living eternity.

497 · Jul 2010

Sink

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

Sink

When It happens
Its mostly common
I fall.
Usually Very hard
l slip.
and free fall into the deep blue depths of the sea
I make it knees length into the ocean
Because you are there
You save me from sinking.
Everytime.
Its you.

496 · Oct 2010

Everyday

Kimmy-Nichole Oct 2010

Everyday

i dont feel it
so whats the point
in or out
yah
**** this
there it is
all doubt
once again
here
alone with myself
Ive made it
barely
but worse
No one
nothing
whats the use
Theres no point
I am a lie
within myself.

496 · Jan 2011

My Forever.

Kimmy-Nichole Jan 2011

My Forever.

You are him
you are the one for me,
I am sorry its been years.
All the tears
of the fears of being hurt by you haunted me -
day in and day out ;

added with all the drops of rain
from the struggling nights of our pain
questioning us, him, you, me and what we should be ...
mixed together
equals
I know that you and I will make it together
Forver.

494 · May 2011

Memorial Day

Kimmy-Nichole May 2011

Memorial Day

what a day,
the first memorial day spent away.
I think and drink-
wonder why Im here again.
lurking in my own dark apartment;
thinking about the place I dream to be,
the city i hated so hard,
yet im yearning for the dirtyness.
the memories
the conversations,
the one who meant the world to me.
Life is certainly not anything it used to be.

491 · Jul 2010

Sand

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

Sand

So Much Of it Covers the Vast grounds of the world-
It is the floormat to the deep blue seas that I never go near,
For I Once fear the Mystery of the Unknown.

489 · Feb 2012

coming up and breaking up

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

coming up and breaking up

you were there thru alll the struggle and grind
a hand to hold when my tears fell
a fight against the world
me all alone
but instead of misery i chose him
i lost a lo t but gained even more
aside from the pounds
and away from the fear
i feel bad for you

488 · Jul 2010

It Is You.

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

It Is You.

Drama follows me
Problems that seem so false
Something out of a fiction novel
Just as the bees follow hunny
I like to fear
Just so things
never look boring and clear
Cant you see?
I create such a ruckous
I am so loud
Yet I hate it
But in the end
Id never ever change it

I hate the drama
You take it away
Its you
You change my mind
You help me find
The purpose
The reason
The Understanding of why

Im still here season after season.

486 · Jul 2010

creep

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

creep

you want to tear me down
I always leave without a sound.
Its never me
But you make it me
I can never please you
Just as much as I can
Never stop hating you
Too much poison and confusion,
Its harder and harder
everysingle day

484 · Jul 2010

Ive got 99 problems

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

Ive got 99 problems

Ive got some issues that nobody can see
but all of these emotions are pouring out of me
this is the soundtrack to my life...

480 · Apr 2011

Parenthesis please

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

Parenthesis please

You were all I wanted.
Everything I dreamt
All I needed.
IT came to a dribbling end.
I tried moving on
I tried Everything.
Nothing
except you.
You were still there

478 · Dec 2011

These words are true

Kimmy-Nichole Dec 2011

These words are true

as the wind blows,
the air chills,
the frost nips at my nose,
and the cold chaps my lips;
I think about the life I live
and the future ahead.
It may be blissful and bright,
or perhaps short lived,
however the cards play out
there is only one thing
I live to think about;
**everything happens for a reason

472 · Apr 2011

ughl

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

ughl

silence in the library
the stillness of the air
the creepy crawl in the pit of my stomach
mixed with the continuous pinching presumes
you hope they dont stare

471 · Apr 2011

The boy downstairs

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

The boy downstairs

The sky is so lit with silver diamonds shimmering in the night sky
so pretty so prestine
why oh why cant this just be one big bad dream
alone in isolation
forced to learn
how to grow up
and not to be the ***** from so cal
who loves me
but doesnt respect me
yet is so protective of me from other guys
but no from his choice violent choice of words
from the little boy with one big ego

471 · Apr 2011

22 4/21/20Eleven

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

22 4/21/20Eleven

the pages are blank bulk and empty.
my mind.
forced with the temptation to reminsce
on the joys and smiles that we shared
made with the memories
ill treasure for ever
in the dreams ill dream upon slumber.

you are stilll apart of me every single day
and behind the miles apart and the struggles and tests we haved faced together; a friendship built upon trust and chance ruined; forever my greatest regret.

470 · Feb 2012

marriage

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

marriage

i want it i dream it i see it i believe it
destiny and fate
love and commitment
following your heart
trusting whats right
finding the right guy
is all i need
where is he?
patience is a virtue

469 · Apr 2011

Great bones broken phone

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

Great bones broken phone

ive done it this time further than ever before
who cares -
i am completly alone
in my head and in my soul

so fried and flicked
******* and ticked

trapped in my own head
insanity has captivated my mind

its me
im the one with the problems

or is this just another life lesson
taught down on my journey of life.

469 · Jan 2011

oceans.

Kimmy-Nichole Jan 2011

oceans.

my dreams
too many to keep count of
float through my conciounce
every second despite being awake,
I question just as much as ever

469 · Jul 2010

It Is Love.

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

It Is Love.

Its happened Its here
My Dreaded days of disgust
Feel as if they might just dissapear-
I am so in love with him
Yes, it feels so good to say it
It is you my babyLove
My dear

Everything I have built up
And let out
You were there
You listened-
It was You who chased my pain
All the way to the finish line
I am so In love with you

467 · Dec 2010

Flash Off.

Kimmy-Nichole Dec 2010

Flash Off.

From Everything Ive felt

through it all

Its not enough

every ounce of hurt

layered in more hurt

than smothered with hate

this is it

the emotion that hits every level of pain

The end to being relieved of pain

is killing my self slowly

464 · Oct 2010

First We Run.

Kimmy-Nichole Oct 2010

First We Run.

i want to go home
i hate this i want out
im over it
ive experienced all i needed
all i want
all i need
baby in the dark
you cant see shiny cars
stupid quote
from that stupid song
my life is one big combination
of lyrics
that fit together to make the best
piece of nonsense

460 · Nov 2010

chipped

Kimmy-Nichole Nov 2010

chipped

Fright
fear
not even a tear
here
near
wrong or wright
right?
Forget the past
Just live it as if every days crystal clear
yah, pretend its now
live in the future.
Not even close
**** it Im not like most

457 · May 2011

So updated, So current

Kimmy-Nichole May 2011

So updated, So current

22 eager and proud,
Not afraid to be blunt,
Ready to reflect myself from hurt,
And to feel with my mind,
And to see the world from life on the otherside;
A benefit of plenty,
Is the feeling of empty.
(In regards to how you must feel and how sorry I am for hurting you)

456 · Aug 2010

More For Fun

Kimmy-Nichole Aug 2010

More For Fun

Standby
Fade Away
Dream the Night Away
Seize the Day
Every Second In Every Hour
More and More
Less and Less
Be that Girl
Just a Little Less
Mischivious

453 · Apr 2011

22 4/21/20Eleven

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

22 4/21/20Eleven

the pages are blank bulk and empty.
my mind.
forced with the temptation to reminsce
on the joys and smiles that we shared
made with the memories
ill treasure for ever
in the dreams ill dream upon slumber.

you are stilll apart of me every single day
and behind the miles apart and the struggles and tests we haved faced together; a friendship built upon trust and chance ruined; forever my greatest regret.

452 · Aug 2010

Hauntings of Yesterday

Kimmy-Nichole Aug 2010

Hauntings of Yesterday

Zen.
Never have I felt it,
Quite as much as I do now;
As the hours pass on,
And the nights pass quicker,
I am positive-
That all the toxic filled problems
that haunted me day after day-
Are finally coming to shore;
To slowly be brushed back into the sea,
Forever and Eternity,
Just as they once were.

449 · Jun 2010

That Was That.

Kimmy-Nichole Jun 2010

That Was That.

This is this.
I can not change the way I was raised
Nor the lessons learned
Or the issues of yesterday
I can not let the day fade away-
In fear of what is sure to come
For That was that
And this is....This

442 · Feb 2012

WHERE IS MY HEAD

Kimmy-Nichole Feb 2012

WHERE IS MY HEAD

where is mind.
\is it outside
inside
under the bed
over the moon
in the roome
on the spoon.
where
where oh were
can some one please
help me find it
im hurting inside
i feel like somethings missing.
its my mind

440 · Apr 2011

ughl

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

ughl

silence in the library
the stillness of the air
the creepy crawl in the pit of my stomach
mixed with the continuous pinching presumes
you hope they dont stare

437 · Mar 2012

love

Kimmy-Nichole Mar 2012

love

so fast
so new
so right
it is not in my control
i follow my heart
listen to my soul
feel of the vibes
it feels so perfect

433 · Apr 2011

iron and wine

Kimmy-Nichole Apr 2011

iron and wine

my heart
my head
throb with confusion
and question my existance

the life im living
the women im becoming
im not quite sure

you would recognize her

iron and wine - the boy with the coin

432 · Jul 2010

Irrelevant

Kimmy-Nichole Jul 2010

Irrelevant

the better i get - it is
h
  a
     r
         d
            e
                r
it is to grasp

430 · Aug 2010

Spinning Free

Kimmy-Nichole Aug 2010

Spinning Free

Impact. Lead.
Ignorance is my Bliss
Be the You If Ill be The Me-
Between the Lines We read It is Clearly Not So Clean
As a Matter of - - -
It Is *****, and Misleading
But Promising In all Actuality.