Would you hold it against me
If i said there's nothing found
That i'll lay here and watch my dreams
Embers, falling to the ground

Would you hold it against me
If i had no strength to fight
And as tomorrow brings the war
Still, no tears escape my eyes

Would you fault it for its being
A doughnut on the shelf
Would you shun it's hollowness inside
It still tries to make its sweetness felt

For there are some that rake for dreams
With disparity in the dead of night
And others whose voracity
The world feared and extinguished light

- c.t.

The soul that yearns perfection
Amidst numbness and the pain
A broken vessel reaching
For love and light again

These bones are breaking fast
And I am bursting at the seams
These voices will not leave me be
And my hollow heart still screams

Emptiness transcends the physical
Maybe that's why my plate's full at times
For what no food or drink can satisfy
Maybe my hunger's a different kind

- c.t.

She was
A dreamer, with wings on her back
A singer, voice like honey in your ear
An actress, all the world was her stage
So many futures, and all of them hers,
but


She was.


- c.t.

you know what matters
is not the skin, but the heart
you know you've fallen in deep
and now you're falling apart
you've ever only seen skin-deep

but skin is all you have.

grasping at perfection
but the more you run it runs deeper
as you fear your reflection
and as this skin wraps these bones
and your heart struggles a beat
as you never find your happiness
emptiness swallows heaps
it's the weight that weighs you down again
and you've started to measure up
counting ways to perfection

but you're drowning in a cup

and it will take you nowhere
but these voices never leave
and you follow, engulfed

but you've ever only seen skin-deep

- c.t.

please take me
and just hold me
don't ask why
don't tell me
i'm hungry
for a perfection
this world demands
i'm broken
but as these bones
collapse
and as i remain
empty
running
from reflections
only i cannot accept
flawed in my eyes
just hold me
shaking soon
just tell me
i'm
beautiful

- c.t.

your words cut
deeper than i will ever let you see
but i know you don't mean
to hurt me or lose me.
and as my voice i stifle
afraid of burdens unborn
your voice, a chime unearthing
demons i thought long gone.

and once more
i cannot tell you
i cannot trust me
i cannot admit
the pain, the hurt, the fear
so for now, i guess
i'll just be
here.
just here.