walls don't talk back
when I spill out my secrets
instead they listen

My weapon sounds like a whip
when the strap hits my palm
wild satisfaction when it lands with a CRACK
oh, dear god its so good to be back
one, two, three, catch
whoosh repeat.
one, two, three, thud
wood smacks my bone
better than the dirt
I go back into my rhythm
as bruises start to form
Turning anger into beauty
and beauty into art

They say to lay down your guns
but instead I throw them up

why did she choose to call me today?
of all days
five thirty nine in the evening
I didn't pick up
I don't (think) I regret it
But why did she call?
when she knows I won't answer...

I've got a high key level of confidence
and one heartbreak sense of dominance
to knock the wind right from your lungs
steal ground right off your feet
I've got a hardened way to drown you out
see how I did that?
Just cut you out.
replaceable?
Not even.
More like not needed
(If we're being dishonest)

Look, I'll be there, okay?
Friday morning.
Won't be late
Nope, not this time
I promise.

Why do you give me that look?
Don't worry, trust me
I've got this
I'll remember
everything, always.

You're doubting me aren't you...
You don't have to
There's no need
This time is completely different
Just relax.

Again? Stop that.
We've gone over this
I told you
You have nothing to worry about.
No, nothing at all.

I want to see the color of your tomorrow
devour the taste of your daylight
in the 3pm glowing gold
of waning afternoon hours
I want your days
the springtime on your calendar
during early mornings
of kodak moments
worth retelling
I want your lunch breaks
to last for decades
never surrendering to the second shift
I want your sunsets to be infinite
for the sun to play hide and seek
with an ever hidden moon
where stars will never be seen
and darkness will never come
I want your first half
the promising twelve of twenty four
meaningful sections of time
that only go on
but I want that time to linger
like the trail of silver
silk worms leave behind
when its over