It took me a few seconds
to realize what this feeling in my chest was.

A smile on my face,
a warm, full feeling in my heart.

Oh
Oh

Loved.
I feel loved.

Her breath is wasted
Thinking she's teaching us well.
I hear blah blah blah.

You came into my life in February.
At the beach, of all places.
Of all my favorite places.

When I was wandering through greyscale
You sparked in front of my face, blinding me

And I realized that maybe even though I wasn't looking
In that moment, meeting you was my reason.

We spent the first five months of knowing each other
Distant and casual and nothing other than friendly.
Being separated by 100 miles isn't so conducive for dating.

I think that made things better.
Enough time to talk.
Enough to realize I could be really interested.

In my humble opinion, we started dating September 4, 2015.

When you took me out for my birthday,
I think our thoughts were running along similar lines;
I want there to be more.

I really wanted that to be a date.
For what we were doing to be a thing we could keep doing
And not because I was lonely or I'd been single too long.

But because in a world where I hadn't dated in two years because I didn't want to
And no one I'd met was worth spending my time on
You appeared and I went, "Oh."

I want to kiss you so badly but I'm so nervous.

In no way do I mind being the one to make plans for us.
I'm a Virgo, it's in my nature
And as long as you keep saying yes, I'm happy.

But it was such a genuinely wonderful surprise to have you come back with ideas.
To me, that doesn't say, "We should carve pumpkins"
It says, "I'm interested in spending more time with you."
And that always makes me smile.

Today I got my nails painted your favorite color.
What am I doing?

Half the time on tumblr these days I'm just looking for quotes to describe how I feel.
About life; about you.

These days, you're in most of the dreams I remember.

All I'm saying is at this point I might be in just on the side of too deep to back out of the water without good reason.

I might be ******* if you ever find all of my poetry about you.

I am too warm
I begin to roll off my socks
one at a time
with my opposite foot
I wiggle my toes
They crack and I feel the coolness
of the sheets
so silky and soft
I want to move my feet around
make a snow angel in bed
Instead I stick one foot
out from under the covers
and settle into the softness
To do anything else
would wake you
and nothing is as beautiful
as your eyelashes resting on your face
nothing is as precious
as the curve of your neck
as the soft contradiction
of your pale cheek lightly flushed
I am still warm
But as if sensing my need you turn in sleep
facing me
Your breath steals across my cheekbones
leaving goosebumps in its wake
It is not in fear that my breath catches
but in awe and wonder
though the strong beat of my heart
cannot differentiate the two
You are a force of nature
stubborn and quick-witted
thoughtful and patient
You are human and strong and self-assured
and I have realized that I love you
My breath catches
You do not stir.

And just when I thought I was okay
I find myself back here again
Right where this all started
Unable to repress my feelings
Undeniably in love with you
Unable to do anything about it.

The good news is
I only have to hide this from you
For five more weeks
The bad news is
I only have you
For five more weeks

I cry for the boy
Whose own father
Abandoned him as a small child

I weep for the boy
Raised in a shallow world
Who succeeded beyond their expectations

My heart aches for the boy
Who lost his mother
To cancer

And breaks for the boy
Who lost his grandfather
That same year

I cry for that boy
Who does not cry for himself
But who has become an unfeeling man