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282 · Jan 2017
Dancing the Universe
She used to dance so high
The stars her playground
Then became tethered to the earth
The moon now comes to her
Kissing her softly each night
With stars as his tears
281 · Dec 2016
Voiceless
Stories that never had a voice
Spoken in hushed tongue

                    we

Loves that are forgotten
Brought again back

                   we are

Laughter echoes
the halls of the mind

                       all

Turmoil and hate
Forever near

                   all we are

Tears sit
In the waiting room

                        left

Longing teeters
On the edge of lips

                      voiceless

The warmth of breath
Crystallizes in the air between

All we are left with
a voiceless

                  *symphony
#muse #ineed
281 · Mar 2016
Untitled (explicit)
Blindfold on
Hands *******
Feathery delights
Scalding touch
Deeper still
Up to the hilt
Hands on neck
Don't need to ask what's next
Breathless lungs
Come undone
Hand prints bare
Claimed what's there
Over again
So many times
No longer a sin
Galaxies collide
What a hell of a ride
#fantasy? #ride #collide
281 · Mar 2016
Him
Him
he speaks of love as only a poet can
one who has had
 his heaRt
ripped out and placed back
in hIs hands,
how i long to
hold him tiGht
to show him that
it will be juSt fine
but no i must not, cannot
i must stay in this so called friend spot
hopefully one day though he will see
that i've been trying to put his heart back, along with mine
where it needs to be
muse..
281 · Jun 2016
Daddy
What happened daddy
Where did you go
We had a rough start
You liked the drugs and alcohol more

Then you grew up
And so did I
I wouldn't speak to you
No, not for a long time

Then I was pushed
Call and talk
That's when I realized
I missed you all those years
I needed that rock

But you weren't a rock yet
Pebbles of sand
Finally glued together
To make you a father man

We grew to know eachother
After all those years
I miss you now daddy
Your voice and wisdom you bestowed
I want to break daddy
But I know
*In heaven, there are no tears
This is not your typical Father's Day poem. Anyone who knows me knows my father's and mine relationship was nearly non-existent. 8 years before his passing we finally reconnected fully. I miss you daddy. I love you. I pray you have escaped purgatory and are in the arms of God.
279 · Mar 2016
The Dark Side Red
Pregnant clouds darken the sky
Winter gives one last sigh
Nor'easter blows strong
Through the city it's goodbye song

Into the storm she goes
Down the walk water flows
Deftly on the cobblestones she steps
Leaving where she never should have been

Ladies and gents in uniform black
Scurrying about to find shelter from the wet
To their respected office these drones
In black suits and umbrellas they hone

Upon umbrellas of black
The rain plays their song
Pitter pat-a-tat tat
She herself hums along

An enigma in the mass
She adorns red from the rest
As the blood that had pooled at her feet
Red as the ones of whom she left to bleed

Upon this dreary rainy morn
She does not in humanity conform
Standing red amongst the black
Red as the ones of whom she has broken and left
278 · Aug 2016
Hell Hath No Fury
They are mine!
I refuse to roll over
No, not this time

I have tried to play fair
Agreeing to your condescending ways
Now you have provoked mother bear

You do not deserve them for all time
You leach their positive energy
Their souls you refuse let shine

Refuse to let God into your house
You taunt them of their belief
As a cat to a mouse

I now carry the rage of God
I will split your temple
As when they killed his only son

Hell hath no fury as a woman's scorn
I have God on my side
Threaten me with my natural born

You will rhue the day you set this forth
Try and take them I dare you
You will end up six foot under earth
Nobody threatens to take my babies!
276 · Dec 2015
Sand
The sands of time slip through my fingers
Each granule distinct, no two the same  
A thought, a fleeting moment
An eyelash on the cheek softly caressed away
The laughter, the tears, the reality of fear
Passing through my hands as though I am a ghost, never really here
Softly they fall thru as though a gentle mist upon the dew kissed ground
All things are muted as I watch, deaf I am to sound
Individual they are, they do not hurt
Together they create a knife that stabs this continual beating heart    
The tears that come are as dry as the sand
I attempt to grasp them all with this ghost of a hand  
To keep them from creating the knife
The one that takes pleasure in my strife
My attempts are in vain
None can hold and destroy these granules of sand
The ones that slip through the fingers of my hand
275 · Jul 2015
The Balm
All love is splayed open in the night Splayed open to reveal it's true intent
It's ****** fire dripping like acid upon the stone
It's tears are rivers down her beautifully distraught face
She has found her love painful when he is not near
But when he holds her it is  a healing balm.
Her love is splayed open on this night of pain
But he has come to sooth the pain.
275 · Dec 2015
Chesire Moon
The moon wears a Cheshire grin tonight
Beckoning me down the rabbit hole
Her pull on me strong as the ocean's tide
I cannot help but go

I jump freely into the abyss
Looking only down, never right or left
I do not need to see what passes by
The words I hear, for I am not deaf

As I fall whispers caress my mind
Spoken words of love, longing, and lust
They are the things I must learn
For to court the dark side I must

The fall has ended, my feet firmly on the ground
There is no light here, all grey and gloom
But in the distance I do see a glow
Here from the dark side of the moon

First I must court the dark side
Attempt to help it find the light
All of this stemming from
The moon's Cheshire pull of the night
Only half her face was showing the other night. Instead of a frown, a smile was there.
#Chesire #darkside #lust #longing
275 · Nov 2015
House of Cards
How we live in this house of cards
Everything here is fragile
Everything here we guard
We line them up
These cards we play
Stack them meticulously
Careful to not make a disarray
A sudden whisper of wind though
Is all it takes  
A sudden goodbye softly laid
This house of cards
f
   a
      l
        l
          s
They all......
fall.........

*down
273 · Dec 2016
House of God
Chestnut hands splayed
Across the white of my skin
Lips igniting a fire
Within my soul
The priest speaks
As these thoughts bombard me
Unable to listen to the sermon
As the roar of memory
Crash against my mind
As waves upon a shore
With each time
the water kisses the lakeside
It takes a piece of it back
as do you
Even while in the house of God
Memories consume every inch of my mind.
#muse
273 · Nov 2016
He Wants Me?
He wants me
he wants me not
He needs me
leaves me to rot
One moment it's on
the next it's not
An open book man
no simple thought
He shows himself fully
a web of shadows he's caught
My heart he holds
i fear will let drop
He wants me
*he wants me not
Not truly knowing is the worst torcher..
272 · May 2016
Yeah, That's It
Emotions flying everywhere
A storm inside
Threatening to destroy all you hold dear

Tears threaten to fall from grace
First time you've seen him since that day
How beautiful it is that he is alive
After his chest you broke, but brought back to life

Tongue is pock marked with scars
Biting as you do
Not sent to ears
Words sent instead to the stars

Eyes wanting the glasses
Rose in color of course
Who wants to see anything but
Instead forced to see the masses

Ears hearing every word
Begging for deafness
From the cries of pain and joy
Instead all is heard

Mind attempting to make sense
The senses seem to be too much
Overcoming all rational thought
You scream inside, too intense

Heart beating out the seconds
Needs to be slowing
Beating faster against will
Peace is for what it beckons
272 · Feb 2016
Unseen
She strolls the green fields
With mist trailing in her wake
Looking for something
What she knows not

A dream pulled her
To this misty green
Searching for something
Possibly something unseen

He mounts his steed
Kicking him hard in the flanks
Racing to somewhere
Leaving the known in his wake

A dream pulled him
To mount his dark steed
Searching for something
Possibly something unseen

Into the forest they both went
Unknown to eachother
In a clearing
That's where they met

Her hazel eyes shone in the moonlight
Beneath hooded lashes dark
His steed glistening from sweat
As he dismounts in the forest dark

Unknowing what to speak
They let nature take the lead
They have found what was unseen
Under the moons twilight gleam

Rose red lips
Sink deep into calloused ones flesh
Leather hands became velvet
As he held her close to him

Their moment of ecstasy
Lasting till the twilight tall
They heeded the dreams
They heeded fates call

Her a lowly chamber maid
Him a high prince
Came together for just one night
Of the unseens presence
What do you do in the unseen?
269 · Sep 2017
Cicadas (part 2)
The cicadas are gone
The story has been told
And so she waits
To see what now will unfold

In the dim of twilight
With the air turning cold
She sits with bated breath
To see if her world does fall..
268 · May 2017
Untitled 50
I am a stranger
In a familiar place
Four walls surround me
I know no longer their face

Upon the counter
Objects galore
What once was familiar
They're now obscure

This used to be a safe place
A refuge from the storm
Now it's nothing
A shape, a form

This is what happens
When emotions collide
Deny what they want
Pain never subsides
268 · Jan 2016
Poem 12 (haiku)
Moonlight bathes the land
  Chandelier picturesque scene
Softly dance off ice
My view this late night/early morn
268 · Apr 2017
Raven
I peered into the eyes of yesteryear
Into the depths of the sky
I saw a raven flying high
It hovered looking me in the eye

It showed me the past crystal clear
It showed me the present
That I don't want to see
It showed me a future
Of what is will
Another of what can be

Unblinking it soared
Into the great unknown
Taking with it a part of me
Leaving me here alone

A fortnight has passed
And still I see
With crystal clear eyes
The past of what was yesteryear
The path of future is mine
Yes, the future is mine....
268 · Dec 2015
T-Shirt
I was going to put it up today
Fold it nicely, place it in a drawer under my old clothes. Or,  just cut it up and watch it burn in my fireplace
Both thoughts made me want to cry
So I didn't
I didn't burn it, I didn't hide it
Hide it from myself to find months or years later,, just to pull it out and remember and let the sadness wash thru me again
I instead put it on
Your scent, it lingers still  
I wonder if it would still linger months, years later
Even after washing it for so long
I was going to put it up today
Never to be seen except by chance
Instead I decided that I would wear it
Wish upon it again and again.....
This is an old one of mine, back from high school. Came across it today. I still own that shirt, the scent is gone.....
267 · Jan 2016
2015-2016
As I sit here on this second day of the new year
I ponder and reflect on my past year
So much has changed
I have grown, I am not the same
Reality hit me early on
A love that was supposed to have last was dead, gone
Two people with two children together could not stay
Now our children the price they'll pay
I worry that they will forever be scarred
That their sweet innocence forever marred
How one year can change everything
Including a marriage that was to last eternity
266 · Mar 2016
Sin
Sin
Sin is just a string which we are all on
the more sin we commit
The stronger the string becomes
The stronger it is, the harder to break

When we are born
We have one string on us
As we become older
More strings appear

Pretty soon we become Satan's marionette
His own little soldier
Even though we reach this point at least once in our lives
We can always turn back to the Lord, Jesus Christ

Though the strings may be hard to break
Through the power of the Lord
We will overcome.
Ok, please be kind.  I wrote this one about 19 years ago. Hard to believe I still have my old high school works.  I have not tweaked it any. This is it in its raw form. It was published in a poetry journal. Again, please be kind.
Here we go again
I knew it was to good to be true
I was feeling happy
Smiling more
Laughing, loving
Then out of nowhere
WHACK!
No reason
No real trigger
The old words flow in..
"you're not good enough"
"he must have someone else"
"you'll never work again"
"might as well just die"
"can't even take care of your kids"
"your whole life is a lie"

My heart races
My tears threaten to fall
I don't know why
It's just there
I can't turn it off
GOD! Please save me!!!
This is a real problem in many lives. We can't just turn it off. Unfortunately, it controls us. We can take medicine, but it's only a bandaid. Love us, remind us we are worth it. That our fears may seem real, but you are there to protect us. Please don't judge us. Stay with us. We always need a hand...
264 · Apr 2016
Country Song
Woke up alone in my bed
My kids at their dad's
I wonder what stories he put in their heads

Worked ******
Everyone was being an igit
I sometimes wonder if it's even worth it

Got paid today
Gone in a flash
Bills mounting up I have no cash

Picked up the kids from their dad's
He decided to fight
Called me a *****, man what a drag

After some movies the kids fell asleep
Alone now with my thoughts
Yeah, and my idiot dog just left me...
True story...
264 · Feb 2016
Flame
Back burner?
No babe, I'm more than that
I'm the flame in your chest
The spark in your eyes
*I'm the bonfire that will ignite your soul
#backburner #no
264 · Mar 2016
Anticipation
Itches to the core
Butterflies begin to soar
Pupils narrow seeking
Heart's beat racing
Lips dry and waiting
Mouth waters
                     anticipating
Nerve endings fire
A spark within desire
How you pray it stays a kindle
Oh this wonderful thing
*Anticipation
Ready or not, here we go....
263 · Oct 2015
Bar
Bar
Weathered hands hold a beer
Speaking of times gone by
Younger hands and voice, sing along with the band
Merle Haggerd is being covered
"The Bottle Let Me Down"
A couple in a corner, with love all around
Another couple sitting opposite eachother
No words to be found
The bar keep keeping everyone happy
Such an incredible feat
The drinks flowing
As easily as the conversations
Young and old on the dance floor meet
Dancing in drunken rythym to the beat
Ahh the wonders the bar beholds
Some are young
Some are old
262 · Sep 2015
*One Day*
May the moon soothe your lips where the sun has scorched them.
May the stars forever sing your lullaby
262 · May 2016
It's Over
It is over
It is done
Goodbye to all of our fun
Goodbye to riding it to the line
You jumped ship before we could truly try
So may darkness keep you inside her breast
May light never reach inside your chest
I hope all lovers stale in my wake
I hope at night you see only my face
Let the memory of me consume
Every last inch of you
Let every new woman feel
Wasted and decrepit against your steel
May you never reach new heights
**May darkness keep you even in light
Speaks for itself...
262 · Jan 2016
Broken
You cannot hurt me
Let me tell you why  

                                             u
You cannot make my    s     n     rest  


If my sun does never    r      e  
                                            i­  s


You cannot force me into darkness    


                        a                   m
When the    t     r   and    o  
                    s        s             o
                                               n    

are my lovers


You cannot     b   e   k                  
                            r     a

something  
            
When it is already     bro k
                                                  e
           ­                                           n
#Broken #night #sun #canthurtme
259 · Nov 2015
How Dare You!
How dare you!
Co-parenting my ***!
I thought we could be amicable
Thought maybe our friendship would last.
How dare you!
If I could,  I'd tear off your member
Shove it down your throat
Set you on fire
sit back and gloat
Do not dare to cross me again
You haven't seen crazy
Oh no, you have yet to see me sin
Oh he's ****** me off now!
#exhusband #******* #divorcewithkids
259 · May 2016
My Mother
I've seen your tears
When you thought I wasn't looking
I heard the "I love you's"
When you said be careful
I felt your strength
When you thought you were weak
When you held me
I felt your pain
When I disappointed
I saw your sacrifices
When you tried to hide them
I felt your love
When you whispered goodnight
Now it is my turn
I hope you don't mind
I will hide the pain and sacrifices
I hope from your eyes
I want you to hear the "I love you's"
When I say goodbye
I want you to feel joy
When you look into my eyes
I want to make your last days here
Ones you don't regret
I want you to feel my love
The same as the day we met
Mother you are strong
You are my safe place
Mother you are mine
No one will take that away
You are my best friend
My forever secret keeper
No matter how old I am
You will be my mother forever
Happy Mother's Day!
259 · Nov 2015
Ravaged
Like a thief in the night
He ravaged her body, took her to new heights
With each moan that ensued
His monster that was caged was let out, let loose
He took her claim after claim
Triumphing over her demons, casting them away  
How she longs for goodbye not be bade
As she looks at the demons cast aside from the bed where they laid
256 · Feb 2016
Dear Cupid
Dear Cupid,

I ask that you please go away today. You see, my heart doesn't want to play. The games you like to throw at us all. My love is always given but never returned in these games where I fall. You have yet to do me right. I've never had a happy Valentine's so why should it be different tonight? So go away I implore of you. Find someone else to shoot your arrow through. Yes I know you have given me a lover. That's fine.  But cupid, I can find those ten pennies on the dime. Your arrow it nicked me and now I'm mad. For a lover is all he wants to be. Now you've gone and done it. **** your arrow that has nicked me.

Forever loathing you cupid,
Me
Happy Valentine's everyone!!!
256 · Oct 2015
Believe
Here's the deal
I don't know if love is real
I believe lust reigns true
I believe in a life of me and you
I believe in partnership
Someone you can share your hardships
Not only those that can be shared
Also someone to hold you, showing they care
I believe in late night talks
I believe in darkest secrets unlocked
So see, I do not believe that love is real
I just believe what I feel
If that's love, so be it
256 · Jan 2016
Mamma
(Chorus)

Mamma can you hear me?
This is your daughter crying out
Oh holiest of mothers can't you hear?
My heart is weeping so loud  
Oh ****** mother dear
Your daughter's heart is ripping out  
Will you not save me momma?
Save me from all this pain and doubt?

(First verse)

He has left me
Abandoned me to the shore
Sailed on to new adventures
He seeks for me no more  

(Second verse )

The waves crash against me
Tearing away at my soul
He has left me hollow
I am broken now, not whole

(Third verse)*

The salt hurts my wounds
Bleeding them fresh with every kiss
How I long for his embrace
As I am made into the sea's mist
My first attempt at a song. A little sacrilegious I know especially for a Catholic like me. Be kind.... I do not know what chord to place this in. I'm thinking a minor most definitely.
255 · Mar 2016
Thrice
Lead me into temptation
Keep me not from the elation
Deny me tonight once again
Keeping us both from our favorite sin

Deny me once
I shall forgive
Deny me twice
My will starts to bend
Deny me thrice
my soul becomes ice

Engage me soon
Forever my angels sing your tune
their song is deafening
My will is breaking

Return to me my favorite sin
Hold me close once again
Thaw this soul of ice
*Ask for penance of denying thrice
Deny us no more...
255 · May 2016
It Happened, It Is Done
Lust swirls off us
as fog over the lake
passion ignites with chaste kiss
clothes burn away
the heat of us an inferno
unable to cool it down
no want to turn to ice
only need of the flames
licking our bodies
scorching our minds
there is no pain
only pleasure is felt
this our private play
here where rage and lust
intermingle, one in the same
bodies broken, bruised
uncaring, ready for more
handprints seared
upon the body and mind
words spoken under the cover of the stars
shown to stand true
under the burning of the sun
no longer are we
two thieves in the night
the edifice we created
crumbled before us
showing all who we are
No need for questions....it has been affirmed.
#inferno #exclusive #finally
254 · Feb 2016
Of Whom Are You?
"Who are you?
Where have you gone?"

"Whom of do you speak?"

"Her, that one."

"Oh, I have killed her
Set her soul free
She was too kind, too weak
Her once repressed soul
Now resides in me"


"Do you not like what you now see?"

"No, I want her back with me"

*"Too bad. She's gone
You never from her should have run
She gave herself to me then"
Let's go down the rabbit hole. The Cheshire Cat has killed her, set her new self free. Be wary of whom you turn from. They will never the same be.....
254 · Feb 2016
Monster
Ten years asleep
Awoken from the coma
Bleary-eyed seeking
Hungry, thirsty
Weak from not feeding
A morsel here
A drop of nectar there
Stronger now fighting
Unlocked you did
Insatiable appetite
Unprepared I fear you are
The monster now set free
Uh oh, what have you done??
#*** #hunger #lust #monster
253 · Jan 2016
Poem 14
Mist comes off the pavement
As though waves from the ocean
Mother nature is trying hard to not weep
Upon this cold winter's eve
  
Unable to hold it in any longer
Mist turns to a fine rain
Wind starts to pick up
Rain drops now menacing, larger

Thunder starts it's rythmic beat
Lightning forks across the sky
Dancing not with the thunder
Yet in erratic silver streaks

Mother nature is not pleased
The heavens are open now
So much damage to come
Vengeance is hers to seek  

Thunder continues to pound its steady beat
Trying to have lightning dance along
But lightning is feral
Having its own rythym to keep

Damage done now
No true winners here
Mist comes again like waves
Mother nature done throwing her temper
253 · Nov 2015
Untitled VII
The toll of the bell heralds in the time
1....
  2....
    3....
It's still dark out
I guess it's three am
The bell chimes again
1....
   2....
     3....
         4....
Another hour passed
I'm still awake
Pondering
Waiting
Anticipating
All for him..            
1....
  2....
    3....
      4....
         5....
Another sleepless night
over obsessed unrequitedness.
253 · Jan 2016
Love
"M'lady" he calls after her
"Dost thou not love thee"?
"Aye, my kind and gentle sir, but 'love' shall not part from mine lips for you. Love is just a word. One that is used far too great. One that is better shown and not said".
"Then what dost I to do my fair maid"?
"That is the question you must answer thy self."
253 · May 2016
Still So
The stars are shining bright tonight
Our constellations glowing
Closer to eachother
Still so far apart

The city lights radiate in the distance
Beckoning me home
They are closer now
Still so far away

Your body emits an inferno
Blazing upon my skin though not touching
You are closer to me now
Still so seperated from me

Our hearts begin to sync
Blood pulsing in our veins
We are closer now
Joined we are one
248 · Jan 2017
I am one..
Fire in my wake
Bridges burning around me
Heat is an inferno

am i still serene

Tears fall from my eyes
Ground becomes frozen where they fall
Winters follows easily

am i still passionate

Black surrounds me
A black hole my soul
Scars litter my being

am i still beautiful

A maelstrom of elements
A storm never tamed
I bow to no one

*can you handle me
248 · Jan 2016
Not Quite Sure
How did this happen?
When did it start?
I wanted nothing but friendship from the start
But you were there and so was I
We were both drunk, and on freedom I was high
I knew after that first night it wouldn't be the same
But I steeled myself to not get involved yet again
I refused to talk to you first for so long
Then the next thing I know it's from morning till dark, till dusk until dawn
You said, don't get attached
******, I think that's when the feelings attacked
I tried hard to just be friends
Now I'm just so **** curious where we will end
No commitment yet has been made
In a way though it feels we've both staked claim
I cannot wait till we both get over ourselves
Maybe then, in each other we can delve
#fwb? #feelings #**** #spider'sweb
248 · Sep 2016
I just want to rest..
I'm tired
Worn out
I don't know how much
I have in me to fight

These ten hours days
Sleepless nights
Taking a toll on me
More grey hairs in sight

I'm doing this
Five days a week
No break
Been doing this three weeks straight

Two of the three when I come home
Homework, dinner
Bath and bed
Clothes aren't fitting, getting thinner

I'm just so tired
I need a break
These ten hour days at work
Five days a week
Three weeks and counting straight
Training a new facility. Wearing me out. It's a good 45 minutes away from home base.
247 · Apr 2017
Mind's Eye
I want to read you
My poetry tonight
So tell me what it will be
Tell me what your mind's eye
Wants to see
Would you like something
Scary and dark
Or maybe one
That'll give you suicidal thoughts
How about something
Happy and carefree
Like children laughing
Playing tag and yelling
you can't catch me
Or how about
Carefree and bright
Inspirational
Make you ponder this so called life
Maybe one
Of unrequited love
Or one that'll make you swoon
Think past the gentle hug
So tell me your poison
I'd love to hear
Cause I want to read you
My poetry tonight
Have you feel my years
246 · Mar 2016
Green
Green eyes
Hard and piercing
Not likely to let go
Not until to her
Loyalty you show
Beautiful as she may be
But when her eyes turn green
A monster rarely let out
Takes charge and screams
You'd best show her boy
Tame the beast let loose
Or it will be you two
Swinging from the hangman's noose
Green eyed monster is abound. Make her yours lest it'll turn to a "see ya 'round"....
245 · Jan 2016
GO AWAY!
Go away
Please go away
This anger, this hurt, this pain
I cannot take it
No! I cannot take it another day
Just go away!
Leave me be!
Let me see
True colors
Not black and grey
I want to shine
Be sweet like wine

I want to laugh
No more looking at my past
Go away! Just go away!
No more breakdowns
i cannot break
I am strong
A woman am I, never wronged
Why was I right?
Why must I have seen the vision placed before me?
Why dear God did you put that for me to see?
An urn, a prayer
The waft of her hair
Why dear God did you do that to me!?
Why?
A picture I did not want to see
Yet, you did, made me believe
i was right all along
I knew it was the reapers song
Tonight I drink
For her and him
For me and them
Tonight I drink
For it to go away  
*just....go....away........
no words....
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