Standing here withered, with clenched fist and a dented tongue.
Cracked teeth and a collapsed lung.
My nerves jumping the gun and firing sporadically,
... A million jolts to the body at once.

I'm here, with wide eyes and a broken jaw.
My heart races in anticipation.
A battle against myself.

A war I've never won.

There isn't a hum compatible,
littered with jet planes and sirens and door slam salutations.
I escape slumber.

Maybe I've just forgotten to close the window.
My mind remains an accessible outlet,
attentive at worst,
a meticulous observation; noticing the slightest bit of dirt under the nail of your index finger.
You may not even trace the outlines of my cheek by the time I have swam deep inside the caverns of your collarbone.
I have to convince myself not to drown.  
Cue curiosity.
The fabric hanging from your body does not prevent me from taking a photograph of your anatomy,
I perfect the direction from which your strength begins.
An indented landmark in your sternum, located in a space that creates an appropriate resting place for a traveling palm.
                                                    I should remember to close the window...

The energy given.
Depleted and mistreated.
As though my timelines have no relevancy to those around me.
Drained without replenishment, no water for my roots.
Only synthesizing the air for you to breathe a higher quality of self involvement.
I'm seeking a synergistic bond where helping hands spread beyond two.
I'm fighting my way through the balance.
Where positivity is borderline naive.
Where I can believe before seeing.
Where the truth in me lifts the truth in you and we exchange oxygen freely without needing to speak of need.
To meet along lines of being human and the same, without the hierarchy of names.
To meet from which we came.

Infinite dream waves rippling out spinal fluid.
  Slipping slowly from reality, the fallacies.
My insecurities beating me repeatedly.
  Filtering endlessly through my integrity.
I close my eyes so I can see.
  I'm lost within this waking dream.

Spatial relations; fading and dissipating.
  Consciously participating.

Space realms flood view.
Same colors, changed hues.
Switches views, new clues.

I navigate mental pathways and imagined dreamscapes
I'm looking straight into the eyes on the unknown.
Alone.

You wanted me to meet you in the ocean but I forgot how to swim and I'm too busy drowning in you. You make me better but I still see everything as tragedy. I still don't think I'm ready to be human with you but I want to try anyway, which is saying a lot considering I don't know how to do anything besides write poetry about you. You tell me I'm special but I think you'll grow to hate that about me. I'll probably always feel safer laying in the grass than in your arms but I want to show you I can do this, I can want you as much as I need you and I need you more than coffee at 6am or cigarettes in the dark and I need you more than I need peace or identity. I always have the desire to ask you to run away with me because I don't want to find myself with anyone but you. Let me find ways to open my heart without scaring you, let me find out how to love you in ways that don't make sense. You make me feel like I'm dreaming and I'd rather not wake up without you. I like us more than I like the silence or distance or longing. I yearn to make sense to you, to be the answer to everything you've ever wondered about. I want to be so much more to you but I can't find the words to tell you. I'm drinking about you again, trying to figure out why you're such a big part of me. I love you and none of this makes sense to me but I don't care. Nothing needs to make sense as long as I have you.

We're all walking cliche's,
So what's the big deal?
I can  wear a beanie and a gay pride tee shirt and moccasins,
And listen to Neutral Milk Hotel,
And talk about feminism and politics.
Do not kiss me with your mustang convertible and your ****** piercings.
I am a taken woman.
But I will take your free drugs.
Thank you very much.
Stop mourning me,
My arrogance should never have been a turn on.
Pretzel crisps, tattoos, and student loans.
It's hard walking down the boulevard of broken dreams,
And bumping into all the other lonely souls.

I miss you
I heard the remorse in your voice as you said it.
Well, sweetheart, I guess I could say I miss you too.

I *miss your judgemental demeanor
And your pugnacious attitude.

I miss you treating me like ****
And your constant complaining.

I miss your vicious words
And your pointless insecurities.

I miss your pissy glare
And your interrogating questions.

I miss your painful attempts at saying sorry
And especially your violent movements.

And do you remember the first day you came into my life?
Oh, love, how I wish I could have missed that too.

There is light beyond this flesh.
Atoms, molecules, and stardust float freely through my veins.
Just another girl, another day.
There is more within my eyes than just the color they retain.