When doors were crushed
With fires breath
and 30,000
marched to their death
When screams rang bright
And hate rang true
And souls ran black
as midnight's hue

When books were burned
And shelves were bare
And  broken glass glittered
Through  winter's air
And cries rang out
despair and fear
unsated hate
unending tears


then chants resound
And rooms are bared
And dried blood glitters
In street lamps' glare
And cries ring out
both loud and true



When rockets flew
And silence blared
and bombs blew
Through autumn air
Yet all is fair
Yet all is fine
For hate
is war is love
Is just

There has to be more to life
than the elaborate mix
of endorphin, serotonin and dopamine.
There has to be more to this moment
than that seductive dance
between fight, flight and adrenaline.
There has to be more to each instance
than the tantalizing stroke of color on the palette of the eye
or the soothing spice of music that brings us to sighs.
More to it than the anticipation of a lover's caress,
or the murmur of a long forgotten scent.
More to it than the cringing from death,
the constant race from pain,
fear
of cigarette smoke, radiation,
gluten and epidemics.
More to it than tears and kittens,
Bougainvillea bushes and hot-rods.
Treasure hunts, graffiti,
date nights and shopping malls.
There has to be more,
for if there isn't,
Why are we so afraid to let "This" go?
Why are we so afraid to die?

See the cruelty of it all
**** that pig
Cut his throat
Spill her blood
The poison can be felt in the air
Permeating everything
The stench of hate
The baying for blood
All in the name of some imaginary friend
That demands blood
in exchange for
a ******, 72 mansions
a heaven on this earth we already destroyed.

I stopped dreaming a long time ago.
Hoping was replaced by survival,
Imagination by the grey grind of life.
I gave up.
I don't want to dream.
I fear the colors;
Blinding, dazzling, befuddling.
I don't want to hope,
I know I have to wake up
once dawn's bleak shadows
darken my window once more.
is it possible to sleep
if you're afraid of dreaming

Green fading to a dusky brown
The leech-like heat
That clings to your body
Menory of a desperate lover at the final goodbye.
Summer was here.
And with it
thoughts of lust,
intoxication
and broken promises
to match shattered hearts

It didn't matter
That i could outyell him
That when he forced his way in
I forced my way out
That when he grabbed my throat
I threw him off
Held him down
Told him it was over
It didn't matter
It didn't matter that i "won"
It still hurt

The sun plays through the window
dances on the railroad tracks
giving every color a distinct hue
Other-worldly
for a moment - Escape
Maybe I should play on the tracks as well
If just to discover
what it is
the sun finds there