Just Me: Favorites

Dec 2013 Just Me

feels

Dec 2013 Just Me

EJ Aghassi

feels

remind me why
I'm still awake
why does
sleep elude me so?

I've searched corners
under-bellies
empty bottles
for answers

but answers still elude me so

i doubt myself
and where I stand
hardly a
respectable man

but genuine
in whatever it is
that keeps me awake
until six

nothing makes
sense

and with street lights
guiding my way
flickering
fading
fulminating

I stumble
trip
through dawn cascading

the walk down every
alleyway
heavy steps upon the street

questioning until collapse
the empty beer cans at my feet

Dec 2013 Just Me

Shy Girl (With a Secret)

Dec 2013 Just Me

JDK

Shy Girl (With a Secret)

Shy girl with a secret
Silently scanning the room
I think I'll go over and try talking to you

Do you mind if I penetrate through your wall of silence?
I can regale you with the minutiae of cinema and science

Play the fool to make you smile
I don't believe I've ever seen one finer
I'm almost ashamed of how badly
I want to be inside her

Can I buy you a drink?
Then we can talk of desire
But no amount of spirits
Will put out this fire

The night's winding down; now where shall we go?
You play with your hair, and say "I don't know."

Shy girl with a secret
Quietly plotting my doom
I should have known better than to have spoken with you

Dec 2013 Just Me

Short and Sweet

Dec 2013 Just Me

JDK

Short and Sweet

Caught up in the space between the first word and the next
While I'm breathing softly into my sweet lover's neck
And when she stirs I feel a burn swell up inside my chest
Of all the tales I've ever heard; I like this one the best

Playing favorites

Oct 2013 Just Me

Shattered

Oct 2013 Just Me

Andy Cave

Shattered

My heart finally healed but it's once again shattered
I showed my true self but it didn't even matter.
I thought I'd found love but instead I found sadness,
the butterflies are dead now my mind is all madness.

Oct 2013 Just Me

what's your number? (10w)

Oct 2013 Just Me

Courtney Snodgrass

what's your number? (10w)

He was ‘the one,’

while she was just another number.

Oct 2013 Just Me

A recipe for a Girl

Oct 2013 Just Me

Artemesia Blastside

A recipe for a Girl

Start with dirt.
Trap a bird for a loving heart.
Wrap it in a rose so she can have thorns to protect it.
Add iron for a good backbone.
Teach her with chalk for righteousness.
Shake in some cinnamon for *****.
Melt chocolate for patience.
Add driftwood for wanderlust.
Build in her a door for loyalty.
Fill with coffee for curiosity.
Gift her a doll for kindness.
Put a book for cleverness.
Mold her a wind for empathy.
Fit her for glasses for self-control.

Stir in orange for dancing.
Stir in green for singing.
Stir in blue for crying.
Stir in red for screaming.
Stir in purple for thinking.

Give her words for pain.
Give her music for joy.
Give her darkness for fear.
Give her stars for rage.

Mold her.
Form her.
Love her.

Then give her a breath, for life.

Oct 2013 Just Me

The Love Song of a Knife

Oct 2013 Just Me

Artemesia Blastside

The Love Song of a Knife

Breathe in,
Breathe out,
...
I'm lying in bed
Honey-sweet sleep is pulling my eyes to unReality, dark and velvet and purple
But I got these words tossing in my belly
Roiling and churning up my throat
Trying to spill out
And burn the pale ****** air
BUT
at the same time
Trying to crawl back down
Scraping with just-cut claws down to my toes curling up in plush-snugly socks.
Scared to be born.
SO
I'm lying in bed
Ready to spin truth wrapped in fibs sprinkled with simile
I just feel frustrated
Because I'm saying the same thing over and over again
But it's just NOT RIGHT.
...
Here's the deal:
I'M NOT REAL.
Or rather, I might be real, but my existence is highly improbable.
I feel weightless,
like I could jump off a bridge and fly
But I can't even convince myself
I just hover on the knife's edge of uncertainty.
Am I real?
Or can I fly?
I know it's one or the other.
And I know it's double or nothing.
Either I'm real- just a person
(but- here's the rub- one who knows her limits...)
Or I'm not- I can fly and dance and
love men and **** dragons.

...

This knife blade is anguish.
I'm not suicidal.
I just want it to stop.

...

I need someone to prove me wrong.
I need you to look me in the eyes
And know that I am yours
And know that you are mine
And know beyond a doubt I exist
And maybe

just maybe

I'll see myself in your eyes
And you in mine
And some of that reflected certainty
might.
just.
stick.

....

*do you love me?

Oct 2013 Just Me

my bus ride home on October 16th

Oct 2013 Just Me

berry

my bus ride home on October 16th

just six minutes. that's all. hold it together.
stop. do not cry. please don't cry. they'll all see.
bite your lip. choke it back. be stone-faced.

five more minutes. you might get kicked out of school.
your parents money will have gone to waste.
they're going to be so mad. but please don't cry. don't.

alright, four minutes. keep your composure.
stop shaking your legs. your eyes are watering.
don't cry. just look out the window.

only three minutes now. breathe. don't cry.
do not cry on this bus. cry in your room. don't think about the fact
that you might've just ruined everything. more importantly - don't cry.

just two more minutes. that's all. the sky is so pretty.
look at your nails. ignore the lump in your throat. do not cry.
i'm begging you not to cry. don't. please, please, please don't.

one more minute. almost there. breathe. stay calm.
they don't know what's wrong. don't think about the fact that you ******* up so bad.
hold it in. alright. you're home now. you can cry, but you might not stop.

*(there's a stupidly long story behind this that i honestly don't have the time or desire to explain to anybody so don't worry about it i just really needed to distract myself on the bus.)