The butterflies in her stomach
assure her she is alive
with a nervous glance
and anxious sigh
she dreamily wonders about "her guy"

I had you in the palm of my hand
I held on too tight.. I guess
I never wanted you to go, I just wanted you stay

I...
I crushed you
I let you crumble, but you were still in my hand
I still had you

Then
I let you slip away
Slipped through the cracks..

Through my fingertips,
You fell
I tried to pick you up
But I only got pieces and particles

I'm sorry I let you crumble
It's my turn now,
So far
no one's tried to pick up my pieces

I’m trying hard to hear what you say,
But I’m busy being afraid that in every glance you make,
My racing heart be betrayed to you,
To you I’m hanging on,
I’m hanging on to your every word,
Cuz for you I’m falling,
I’m falling for you and getting crushed,
Where this will go in time, I don’t know,
I don’t know, in time if you’ll know, where I want us to go,
I don’t know if you’ll be mine,
Or I’ll let you forget there is a me you know

I can't figure out why you stare at me
I can't figure out if the rumors are true
your the one i want to see
your the reason i watch what i do.
I don't think my feelings will change
you got me feeling kinda strange
you've got me worrying about he way i walk
and thinking before i talk.
the way you give me a rush
I'm thinkin' i got a crush.

it's why we write these poems, you know.
we are a delicate
    and intrinsic
        and easily broken bunch.
when our feelings creep out
    like sneaky, giggling children,
and then someone
  -some of them
               don't even mean to -
crushes them
and we call.
   "wait!"
      we call
    "i didn't even know
           they got out!"
but they did.
  some people
a tender friend
a boy as adorable,
                     breathless
                           clumsy
                              and careful
                          fumbling, but trying
                                                as can be
cradles them
   delicately, in their hands
and knows
         they must be tended
well -
   isn't that
          why we risk
the crushing?

There he is, I spotted him for the first time
he looks like an angel, could this be for real?
it doesn't seem true that I met you
but I have, and I'm loving this feeling,
this feeling for you

ah yes,
the crush

that festering,
infected,
growth
on your heart
that,

right now,

seems small
and
innocent
and
peaceful

but give it time

it will grow

increasing in size
and power until
you can’t deny it;
like genghis khan
knocking on the door
of those pompous,
Abbasid emperors
of a thousand years
ago

then you’ve lost
you can’t fight it
you don’t even want too
you just want to love,
to hug,
to caress,
to kiss,

her.

and then it all comes crashing down with a simple

no

but you know
what they
say:

“it’s only a crush”

and boy
how right they
are

Honey I'm crushing
Hard as hell
Baby its on you
You know I like you
Oh yes I know you do
But sweetie you're perfect
sweet as sugar
honest as washington
but I guess you want someone
pretty, funny, and smart
im just an old ****
whatever i know you don't want me
im lame as can be
I can't help crushing on you
I mean seriously boy look in a mirror
You'll see how perfect you are
look through my eyes to how i see you
I know I shouldn't like you
I should give up
But if I do give up
I think I will give up with love overall

© 2013 Emily Larrabee. Legally Copyrighted, all rights reserved