The kitchen was running a temperature
the chef was having a fit
I was in the bathroom
having a crafty
smoke,

what else?

naughty taught me
how not to get caught
but you
catch me every time.

What a day
work away
sweat away
get no pay,
oh
that's not true,
the compensation for my labour
does not make me blue.

We're back to Monday
again.

Have you ever felt that Monday's
just a game that God plays on us
a game like  'blind man's buff'?

or is it all a bluff
and we fall for the same old
game yet again?

Not morning yet or rather
it's not light enough to tell
if it's morning yet
and here I am
cup of coffee,
toast and jam
looking
for all the world like a King,

I haven't seen
that face in the mirror
the one with the razor
I have no wish to gaze upon that.

Think I have tinnitus
which is like arthritis
but more musical
or
it could be
the kettle whistlin'

*** me it's bedtime
hardly had time
for me time
and She says
it's your time
to shine.

Here in Santiago
where I often go
for
forgiveness
from his holiness
it's hot,

not that it worries me
and that's odd
because
most thing bother me
but not this.

There are heirlooms
that are used daily
and dusted weekly
because
the butler left
without notice
except
I noticed

and now
I have to
beg forgiveness again
for
cursing him.

Breakfast in bed
and She said,
something but I wasn't listening
I was putting the bacon in the
'George Foreman'
guaranteed to give it more of
a punch,
tomatoes in the pan
eggs in the poacher
not forgetting
two slices in the toaster,

She said,
is it nearly done?

I was chasing the eggs which
had started to run
the bacon had shrunk
the toast was black,
I'll be back
says I
closing the door and ready to fly
to the nearest go-to
for a take-away.

some stay
some go
and
some no longer want to know,

everything hurts when everything hurts.

It's Sunday,
shall we pray or
shall we go outside and play,
and by we I mean of course me
because no one wants to stay,
well
can't cry over split peas
spilt milk or cold teas so
I'll get on by getting along
by myself.

It's Sunday and at the risk of
repeating myself,
some stay
that
is what makes every day
bearable,

which is like terrible but
nicer.

John
though not the Baptist
still
lost his head over a girl.

If you view older people as
architectural salvage
they become
as they should do
more valuable.

I'm in the classic range
which is a mountainous region
in Spain
or so
I'm led to believe.

There's a lot of humour about
don't let them take it from you.

When you begin to realise that each day has an expiry date and that's the date that the day falls on, finite and it was a fine night but I was tired by seven, home by eight, crawled into bed at nine and here I am again starting another day for the 25 thousandth time give or take a day or two.

Once again I am not complaining
just thinking of all those hours I put in
to get here.

Saturday and I've seen a few of these
mostly upright without the knackered knees
but I count my blessings and it turns out
that my blessings equal the number of days
I've been around and I'm a bit rounder now
or so She says.

She says
that I'm doing well and to keep on going
but
She always says the nicest things.

I swear
that if we're ever going to get there
we're
going to have to change the ringmaster
rearrange the circus tent and be what we're
supposed to be.

Civilisation.

It'll go one of two ways
and if it goes your way
you're in,

and if it doesn't
you're still in
but it'll be in
something different.

Remember Yogi Bear?
does it
sometimes
feel like we're all there
in Jellystone
with Boo-Boo,
waiting for
walkers?

or is it just me being hungry?

Poor Pete
six feet under
it's a wonder
I'm not too.

Sometimes it's blank and
I sit and look but don't see
don't really hear much either,
and then I snap out of it
back into the thick of it.

Safety mechanisms
keep us safe,

yeah
a Kalashnikov's fine
but if you've got
a brain as scrambled as mine,
you'll forget to load it.

And there they go
consigned to the deep
at Scapa Flow.

if you can't beat them
sink them,

It's
all or nothing or it's
all and nothing to do
with me.

I've been out
but I'm lit now
joining the ranks
of
how it used to be.

A long day
measured out in
bread with no jam
is longer than I can take,

Listen up
anyone who's even trying
to get there
gets my support
and I don't mean,
my truss.

struggles are real,
feel them and weep,
keep your hatred off
this platform.

Here
in my mind's eye
the minutiae
of this existence.

I always hear them crying
think they're trying to get
back to the sea
but here's a new thing
just heard some cowbells ring,

Stratford is getting weirder.

It's urgent
that's what she said to me
I answered her and quite casually
in the 1950's way
what?

oh, what said she,
you
were supposed to be here,
at the stroke of three

well
something came up

oh
how unusual
she said.

*** me
if I was only fifty years younger,

she burst out in laughter
and to be honest
ha
I don't blame her.

Oh yeah,
I live in the met' area
and yet never see the met' near here,
they must be eating doughnuts
at Krusties.

Crime is rife
and they tell me
that's life,

but me being good
think that life should
be better.

They're still here.
sometimes in the bathroom
the kitchen, the hall,
sometimes hidden so well
I can't see them at all
but
they're still here,
sometimes in the living room,
which is really peculiar
because they're all dead,
sometimes in my head
scrambling my brain
sometimes I think
that it's me
and I'm insane.

What it is
to be
something other
than
what it is.

sometimes
inertia wins
but I always rise
               to fight again

Well,
she asked
what are you doing next week?
and I replied
oh
I might go motorboating

when she picked herself up from the floor
and dried her tears of laughter
she said,
'say what?'

I had to google it,
but I meant speedboating.

haha living and learning.

If we are made up of elements
they must have made me from old
kettles and two-bar fires.

Ironworks
gasworks
electric works
even blasted roadworks
but nothing ever works
out right.

I am on the cusp
but
I developed a lisp,
then I fell over
so
it must have been a list.

Thanks to the Giant in the beanie hat
for that little pun.

I never won the lottery
not surprising really,
I didn't buy a ticket

I saw the long queue
and thought *** it,
but
I could have won it
if I'd done it.

Coffee.
the first cup's
just a waker upper,

the second,
is sheer extravagance

Jaws.
well
that's what some doors are
waiting to swallow you
up.

We go through them anyway
hoping for a different outcome
thinking we're Jonah
and that we'll come out
the same way we went in.

To each of us and everyone
we will in the end
choose
our own poison.

Passion's not a poison
but can certainly be a
killer.

Saturday night sat in
with a glass of
sparkling elderflower
and you thought I was
going to say
cyanide
ha
that's
a bit wide of the mark.

BC
is before coffee,

AD
is after dinner

now
jeessus will tell a different tale or rather his biographers will
and we have to decide on the truth of it.

I've forgotten all those begats
which in some eyes makes me
the woe-begotten
but
there are too many names to remember,
too many parables to decipher

and it's Saturday.

You'll come to your own understanding
if you're granted the time to put the time in,

'goodness and mercy will follow me'
but it's a ***** trying to get them
out of me.

it can be a rocky road
when you're carrying
the weight of the load
but
there is help if you seek it
if
you're prepared and ready
to take it,

I came to that understanding
when She put her hand
in mine.

The sky clears
but it's evening
even so
the sky is clear.

I'm here looking on
at the goings-on
which would go on
even if I didn't,

it's a sobering reality
when realising that time
will finish me,
hopefully not before tea,

She,
chimes in with what gives?
live it and love it or lose it

I choose to live it
and love it
so
I won't be winding the clock
anymore.

Then I think that I'm mistaken
believing that this is just the beginning
when the end is on the corner,
waiting for my numbers on the lottery

but if this was the lot for me
I'd take a moment,
to **** through the windows of
monotony

last chance to get out of there
before we head them off at the pass.

because we're running through the workings
when the works no longer exist
the foremen all retired
except for Septimus
he was fired for being ******,

we have no industry
we have coffee on every street,
a battalion of buckwheat
and
oat milk for christ's sake

there are no living people in the afterlife
and fit of fat
clever or a ****
you'll be dead when you get there
and
there'll be no flamin' oat milk.

The hall of fame was shut
but
why would I care?
your name is not there
it is engraved on my heart.

But it was dark behind me
when the light was in front of me
and the door had been closed on me,

through the window
I could see
that I had become
a silhouette.

I asked her for a cocktail
she gave me a Molotov
which
blew my socks off

the rest is history.

After five and still dark
can someone please switch on
the sun.

August must run in my genes
and means that July has left me.

At the end of the pier
I see her
She sees me
and we dive into the depths
of a welcoming sea,

we surface and sink
I blink and
She's gone

can somebody please
switch
on the sun.

the council courts the needy
because every London council
is greedy and feed on the poverty stricken,

it sickens me
can't pay your council tax
taken to court
sought out by the court/council employees
offered a deal
and
suddenly
well
nothing's real,
you'll be evicted
given a temporary
and you'll think yourself lucky#

well *** me
corruption is rife
what a fukin life we're living.

You work your fingers to the bone
and what do you get?
bony fingers
but we all know it
and if we don't we should

it's a case of
'Buddy can you spare a dime'
and in another time
maybe
but
we've been left holding the baby
and it's a right little *******.


Vote them in
and
they'll carry you out
because you died of the cold,
but you're old
and they don't care about you.

Lost the plot
think it's too hot?
hell has a surprise
for you.

I was roasting
and not potatoes,
but it felt so nice
I roasted myself twice.

And today the weathermen say
cooler weather is on the way,

what a miserable shower they are.

Things either pan out or you get out
there are no other choices,

fool yourself and we all do
we all make do
and then one day
when the making do
doesn't do it for you
you get out.

I am a dreamer
and she seems a nice girl,
a sugar and spice girl,
but dreams are sometimes
nightmares.

I was watching those young
rollerskaters
wearing shorts that could split
the atom.

Happy but sometimes sad
you cry a bit and that makes them mad,

hey
you with the tears in your eyes,
man up or ship out,

there is hardly any space in the in-between
to be any different.

I never joined the dead at twenty-seven club,
I was probably down at the pub and
missed the boat,

funnily I never worried about that
so I wonder why some films
that I watch
make me cry.

Sometimes
you just gotta smack yourself awake,
shake the sleep from your bones
and wiggle your toes

those times are for when you forget
to buy coffee and the only thing to drink
is tap champagne
( water with Alka Seltzer )
there's some detox tea
which makes me ***
and something with vanilla in it
oh
wait a minute
no
that's ice cream

I could really do a double espresso
that'd make me get up
but not necessarily go

Tuesday
was
designed to be
scaled
so far
I have failed

nil points.

If jealousy was a nationality

what a world we live in
and
a planet we live on,

can't escape mate
fukin' gravity init?

anyway
reading comments
by
flamin' aliens on another post,
not my post,

education is done for
if those are the comments we hope for
and does it affect me?
not remotely

but it's the Internet
and I get it,
it's mostly ***** by the shovel load.

Already the bite is on
Labour is in
the old guard has gone
but not for very long,

this is just another thieving
conniving government
thriving on lies.

Thus we swerve them
those questions that are so hard
for most men
and we don't answer them.

And the female knows
that nothing grows
in barren ground.

I should have joined the army
but instead
I got me wed.

Grammarly tried to change me wed into mewed
well
I am a ***** cat

haha
off to work.

This is why they made glue
so that when you fall apart
you know what to do
yes, you
glue yourself back together.

a knowledge of your ****** geography
is necessary
and a bit of human biology comes in
handy.

always carry glue
it's what I do.

I've been sitting here for some time unwinding
chillin' out with Morgan and his crew
but
I think I'm done now
I put my time in
clocked out at eight
ain't that some rhyming

so
it's beddy bo-peep
bet I can't sleep
bet she won't either.

We must have all been there and not known
that childhood is outgrown

If I fall
when I fell
behind the scribbles
I made
I will dwell

and in the house made from a cornflake box
I will take off my socks and bite my toenails,

which we all did at one time
a long time ago