John Bartholomew

John Bartholomew Feb 2020

Wake up
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My god, she added last night
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14 new comments
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***. I cannot believe she posted that picture
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Best look on Insta
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No Way!
22 new pics
Who is he?
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Her ex? Again, no way!
I'll give it an hour
5 minutes pass.
I might have missed something
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Nothing
OK
Not OK
No pics of me yet
Why no pics of me?
Did I look that bad?
Better check
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Nothing
This could have been a mistake last night
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Fear Of Missing Out

JJB

FOMO (fear of missing out) is the enemy of valuing your own time - Andrew Yang

The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once. - Albert Einstein

I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

John Bartholomew Feb 2020

Pictures of Matchstick Men (L.S Lowry)

For he drew whatever was the scene
Of Northern towns and sometimes swings,
Of wherever he had been
The detail not always riveting like a Van Gogh or a Constable
But always on set, and you could always bet, simplicity is a sacred tool
If the stroke portrayed kindness,
And each drawing a wellness
To how we lived in other times to now

L. S. Lowry

JJB

John Bartholomew Jan 2020

I'm not OK

I don't know how to keep disguising the fact,
That when someone asks me how I am,
I don't like to say,
But,
OKAY,
I'm not OK

JJB

John Bartholomew Jan 2020

Leaning

A little to the left
A little to the right
Hell I think I've seen all our sins
Looking beyond all what might have been

We lean a different way everyday in life
Depends on what has been giving you trouble and strife
I'll vote Labour one day and the Greens another, prey
It's all who has the best policies in all of what they say

My favourite actor, footballer or the car that I might drive next
All different decisions on what hasn't got me vexed
For our minds do blow on the direction of our inner winds
As a politician you were great now look at their dastardly sins

Again, a lean to the left when all is good and proud
A lean for right to get it off your mind, a shout now heard so loud

Whatever way you lean it's good to get it off your chest
For only you can decide which way to lean,
And do for you,
What really is for the best

JJB

There are two things that are more difficult than making an after-dinner speech: climbing a wall which is leaning toward you and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.

Winston Churchill

Management is efficiency in climbing the ladder of success; leadership determines whether the ladder is leaning against the right wall.

Stephen Covey

I've been to the Leaning Tower of Pisa. It's a tower, and it's leaning. You look at it, but nothing happens, so then you look for someplace to get a sandwich.

Danny DeVito

If you are not leaning, no one will ever let you down.

Robert Anthony

John Bartholomew Jan 2020

Teddy Bear (in worn out wear)

Rummaging round the cupboard and the smell was getting rife
There he sat, proud as punch, that bear made by Steiff
1920's since he'd last had any play
Just sat in the corner looking benign, and that's where he'd stay
A move of his arm under that cardigan they'd had knit
Legs that dangle and now lose, let's get him fighting fit

Rotten to the core his fluff now to be rebuffed
A filler of modern type, now that's the kind of stuff
Eyes that hang on from the nimblest of thread
A cuddle and a kiss and this bear is ready for bed

A story he could tell of the Germans and how they did slaughter
Dropped in the corner by the village mayors daughter
Just left to rot until it's new owners undamaged his house
Feet now nibbled and left to rot, all by the local mouse

Love can come in many guises and this new life is so sweet
It's new owners place him proud with pictures for their tweet
Now a star of the telly on a show by BBC's The Repair Shop
Thanks Julie and Amanda,
You've given me a new life,
Please don't ever stop :)

Teddy Bear (in worn out wear)

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2019

How can it already be the end?

Arriving like a flash of pure light,
A buzz,
A whiff,
A, look at me, I'm not here just as a gift

Momentous,
Crucial,
Pivotal,
Names I have plundered, on a Sunday morning call

Historical,
Far-reaching,
Consequential,
Fateful, all in a book, no author may dare claim

Evidenceless,
Timeless,
But always on trend
Oh Lord, how can it already be the end?

JJB

“Disbelief held me down inside my footsteps, making my body heavy but my heart wild.”― Markus Zusak

John Bartholomew Dec 2019

Odd Socks

Whether black or blue, white or brown
We all find each other in these quirky little towns
Love is a thing of a thousand discussions
If your English, Irish, French or Russian
Language is but a barrier as long as you trust them
Supporting rival teams but still laugh at the same stuff on the telly
She cleans his boots, takes a sniff, although he's properly smelly
Then makes his favourite desert, mmm, ice cream and jelly
For we all have our differences, let just make it fit
No room on the sofa, let's laugh, chat, here's somewhere to sit
As we don't have enough time to hold such grudges,
tick-tock
tick-tock
Because, lets face it, we are all really, just odd socks.

JJB