John Bartholomew

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

It tells a story, the grip of such men
You can give it a mark from one up to ten
The flaccid none particular of whom you might as well forget
From the strong and sturdy and pleased to meet you, much more of a safe bet
For a hand with five fingers that has no strength will hold up no life long wills
It will crumble and fail at the first sign on danger, never willing to foot the bills
But a rigorous grasp with a smile and heartily clasp is a better hand to follow
Not a weak and wet lettuce, whose hand felt like a cretins, mostly hiding in the shadows
As life can often take us on a path led by utter dimwits
But choose a journey not laid out by those who you just don't seem fit.

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

Rodney the Reindeer (The Forgotten Reindeer)

It's ok, I've never heard of me either
I'm what's called 'back-up' in case a famous one loses its tether
You think the big man relies wholly on the ones that you've heard
They're just for the kiddies tales baby, don't be so absurd
There's Splodger, Spliffer, Ransack and me,
To name but a few with names that don't agree
There's Woody and Wobbler with Randy and Tiddler
You'll get the jist with the names that have been called here
All stood out the back after the main ones have been chosen and cleared
Kids don't want to hear of the ones who break all the rules
Sitting around all day stinking of their own stools
For this isn't the way of a tale to be told
If written in books then none would be sold
As I am the just the Reindeer waiting in the wings
Credit to Rudolph and the other ones who's names the children sing,
As I am happy to be just waiting here, stuck between the shadows
As time will tell if Rodney fits a story, that all will someday follow

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

A Rebel Without a Pause

Causing trouble for the sake of it
Stampeding through life without a thought to think and sit
Mumbled words that when heard offend
Sitting on the fence is a place for the quiet to send
Rampaging on occasions that can get on his wick
Sometimes wrong but they are wounds he can now lick
Sitting back and thinking it through
Maybe Johnny was better as a boy named Sue
Not my place they say but I'm allowed my opinion
I'll cry if I want even if I'm not cutting those onions
Born as you are it's up to them if they really want the change
Sometimes its a shock with looks that can be strange
From girl to boy to woman to man
You want to break those rules because you really can
when acted by the legendary man that was James Dean
This is how you want the world for you to be seen
A rebel without a cause
I don't stop under your set rules
Set by years of the norm and played out by fools
As I am,

A Rebel Without a Pause

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

Public Service Communication

THIS IS AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO ALL WAITING ON PLATFORM 3. YOUR TRAIN IS CURRENTLY RUNNING 30 MINUTES LATE. WE APOLOGISE FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE.

Oh great.
And this to make up for always being late.
Maybe its fate.
A love that was never meant to be.
Something that only the Gods of time can see.
A text.
What can I do but maybe make-up ***
A text
A wait
Now a reply of hate
Flowers in the bin and I won't bother
She'd be better with a more reliable lover
A girl with no watch and an absence of time
If available then join the back of the line
Time to defect and walk back down those stations steps
Always another girl so what the heck
There in the back ground whilst kicking some stones
The noise of an announcement far away from the stations tones....

WE WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGISE FOR THE RECENT MISCOMMUNICATION ANNOUNCED REGARDING PLATFORM 3. THAT TRAIN IS NOW PULLING IN AND IS ON TIME. AGAIN, WE APOLOGISE FOR THIS ERROR.

**** it.

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

Division

I voted out
You voted in
Who would have thought what a mess this ended up in

No rules just lies
Some even on the street having a public cry
All we can do now is just try

I love this great land for all that its worth
From its music and history to football and its birth
Now we just fight over a decision asked by DC and his smirk

All we hear on the news is a choice of which way to turn
Article 50 may as well have been burned
We now need a leader to guide this ship with a hand that is stern

Decisions, settlement, judgement
Still up in the air that needs some stable guidance
Who's to be next to blame and sail to safer climates

As for now we just don't know
Who holds the dice and who's next to throw
For this land needs to come together and head for a new vision

As the last thing we need is this now,

Division

JJB

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

Drunken Party Dancing

If you want to show them what your like then do
(Think about it now)
Let you be you
(Don't)
Get up and dance, ignoring the few
(Please don't)
You've been here 2 weeks, it's good to be true
(Seriously, listen to that voice in future)
The MD's wife looks alright, put out your hand
(What have I just done)
Get up my love, never mind him, let's dance
(Oh God)
Put your hands out to this beat, be it 60's or trance
(Seemed like fun)
Now I'm thinking back to what the hell have I done
(I told you)
A few drinks on the company bill, was only a bit of fun
(how can I avoid work on Monday?)
The start of the new week and what have I to come
(Are they smirking still at my boldness)
Sit down, computer on, Inbox half full
(OK, not so bad)
Usual junk and the odd serious email but there it is, lingering
(Let's hope he's in a good mood)
See me at 10, we need to have a chat
(**** it)

JJB

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. ...- Ernest Hemingway

It's okay saying sorry, but when you are drunk you say what you really feel - Vidal Sassoon

An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy, would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men - Charles Darwin

John Bartholomew Dec 2018

False Death

Death
  It happens
   No avoiding it
      Who's gonna miss you?
       Well lets stay and find out
       Fake it and hide at the funeral
      And see who really cared for you fool
       Who sheds a tear or who's just for a beer
        Your jokes were risky but with good humour
            Some walked away but no one would really tell ya
            You larked around and sometimes pushed the limits
          Well that's just life and that's just the way it sometimes is
           Never to grow up and still acting like one of the daft kids
           Living life without a care oh yes ignorance really is bliss
            even my neighbour turned up over my Uncle and Aunt
            Surprising as he hated my music well my Robert Plant
            Well even the Gooner turned up as football is respect
           He wouldn't even bite even if it was on a daft text
         So this is the showing that I have amount too
          Me stuck in a bush watching this rabble cry
            I'm actually flattered that they even tried
          Should I reveal myself to spoil the gig
          Just to show me to be a selfish pig
             I'm honoured I really truly am
              Shame about the sandwiches
              Pickled onions with Spam
            Think I'll stay alive
             As the foods bad
              No party now
               So overrated
               Is death
                R.I.P.

There are more dead people than living. And their numbers are increasing. The living are getting rarer - EUGENE IONESCO, Rhinoceros

Dying is like getting audited by the IRS--something that only happens to other people ... until it happens to you - JEROME P. CRABB, Death Quotes and Quibbles

Cowards die many times before their deaths
The valiant never taste of death but once - WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE, Julius Caesar