See that tear in my eye 
Well it's full pain
If I give up now
Does it mean everything I've struggled for
Done in vain?
I know times get rough
But it seems as if my good just isn't....
Good enough
I try an give my all
Still some how I seem to fall
I look for inspiration 
And all I find is temptation 
Leading to my corruption
So now I'm thinking and breathing
Heavy 
Just waiting on the day that 
All this will break me
I feel like I'm chained at my hands and
My feet
So instead of trying 
I lie in defeat 
Ashamed of my failures
At times I feel like this war I'll never
Win
And my only option is to retreat

Love *****
it's like AIDS for your emotions
like a special drawn up poison potion
how can such a small thing cause so much
commotion
so much destruction
so much pain
breaking down your emotional defenses
like **** for the heart
never leaving you the same
just torn apart
giving you ups and downs
smiles and frowns
your addicted
even though it's bad
something that makes you happy
and horribly sad
then you have withdraw
so you put up this wall
this sense of security
cause one gives their all
just to fall
you believe in something so fake
so unreal
to the point your numb
and can't feel
crying over it
while they forget it
you feel lost
and the cost
was a broken heart
cause you wore your heart on your sleeve
and it got walked on
and stomped on
so now you just try to recover
and get yourself together
putting the pieces together
hoping it will get better
but a broken heart will always need fixing
and there will always be a few pieces missing
so I know how you feel
so here is my token
this was written for you the heart broken

It may seem like our fire has been a little  burnt out
It may seem like we haven't been the same in awhile
Just tribulation & trail
No longer get those sweet text
About how you feeling me
Do­esn't change the fact you're my queen
To be
Our world maybe upside down
But all we gotta do is stick aroun­d
Because after the night comes day  After work comes play
If we give it our all
When we take this leap 
We'll survive the fall 
My end all be al­l 
My dearest woman of mine 
The x and o on my valentine 
There is no place in the world id rather be
Then next to thee
In just a matter of time sparks
Will fly
We'll soar into the sky
And let the wind take us where ever
No matter how harsh the weather
We'll get thru it as long as we are together

Lord knows she's beautiful
All that hurt and that pain 
Is her fuel
To make it big 
And get out of this **** hole
It's getting harder and harder 
Not to fold 
So here's a few words
You're beautiful and strong
And I'm proud that you are still hold on
You deserve a grammy
Cause you really had me
Thinking you were fine 
But as time goes by 
I hear you say 
That everything is falling apart
That you have a tainted heart 
with me you don't have to lie
In me you can confide 
There's no need to hide 
Let it pour
And if I could I'd take that pain 
Away
just to hear you say everything 
Is great 
That you're feelin good and
Livin better 
That you made it 
And got your **** together
And no more trying, no more crying
I hope these words of encouragement 
Help you push through 
But even if this fails 
Know that 
you're beautiful
And strong 
keep holding on

This is for the lovers who give and never receive
This is for all those people who loved me
This is for the ones who cry
   for the ones who try
This is for all those who we're deprived
This is for all those who never got their light
This is for those who might have lost their sight
    but still put up a fight
This is for the single mother whose child will be sheltered and covered
This is for the million and one tears shed from a broken heart
This is for the families whose lives have been torn apart
This is for the trust worthy
This is for the lonely
This is for the what ifs and oh wells
This is for the I don't give a **** and I don't give a hell
This is for people who live life and don't waste time
This is you who puts a smile upon this face
This is for the person who lights up this place
This is for your lonely cry
This is for your special guy and your special girl
This is for the world
This is for the people at the bottom and top
And everything in between
This is for you from me

If you really knew me
you could see past this facade
past this mirage
you could see I constantly cry
like a water fountain
but you will never know
cause my tear clouds never make it over the mountain
I hold them back
cause I am strong (so I think)
but if you look close enough
you can see my flaws
the worn cracks in my face
and how I'm a dark pit
a dark place
you'll see me fall apart bit by bit
you could see how my eyes are closed shut
yet my soul bleeds
it bleeds endlessly onto this worn out paper piece
now you really know me

Emotions run cold 
When your no longer here to hold
Ice runs through my veins 
My heart carries stains 
And scars
So I bury it in the dark abyss 
"I love you"
I hate that I remember this
Coming from you 
It would be easier just to erase you
Just to CTRL + ALT + DEL  
But if I do I delete apart me
I know it's for the better 
But I can't stand not being together 
I'm torn 
Torn in two 
Can't imagine a life without you
But you've caused so much pain
That me and pain see each other constantly
Emotionally, and mentally I'm broken
Some say love is a token 
But I have nothing to Show for it
Emotions run cold 
This **** is getting old 
But I still don't know why it's you 
I still want to hold

Look at me 
May you see what you see
Either way imma be who I be 
I'm not gonna seek 
A different identity 
Cause conformity 
Just isn't me 
But as you read
You'll see I bleed, me 
So read into it 
Cause I put my all into it 
So don't judge a book by its cover 
Until you've read all through it
So you say you real 
Prove it 
Actions are louder than words
But words tend to hurt or heal
So I try to practice what I preach 
I try to follow before I teach
So look at me 
Look at me 
I'm just a product of my environment 
My surroundings may be dark
But my soul stays vibrant
Through this writing I become fluent 
Because without my writings I feel translucent 
To tell you truth I couldn't give a ****
So save your two cents
So look at me 
Conquer this insanity 
Tupac would be proud 
Of the man in me
So I don't know if you can keep up
Imma feed my dreams 
Till I blow up 
It's either show up or
Get shown up
I won't shatter 
As I gather 
And dunk on my opponent 
Cause my mind is like the lane
I own it 
May it never be chained down by anything or anyone
I just want you to look at me for who I am and the good I've 
Done .... Look at me

If you really knew me...
you would know I love to write poetry
it can be random or about me
it can be complex or as simple as can be
I can write and get so into it
the transition from mind to sheet
can be so fluent
at times my emotions tend to spill
letting out all that I feel
like a movie reel
played before your eyes
you would know this easily
that's if you really knew me...

For each death there was a tear from a star
For each death there was a cry from a far
A million plus deaths, A million plus tears
A million plus cries, A million plus ignore what they hear

Something needs fixing 
Something has gone missing
So I start with the man in the mirror
I get up close just to see clearer 
I try to figure out what I see
But what I see isn't me
Broken down and disfigured 
Reassembled but misconfigured 
Like a collage glued together
With tears,  pain, hurt, and lies
False hopes, empty promises,
A bunch of tries, and silent cries
But I hide all this 
Cause who would want this
**** I barely want this
So what doesn't **** you makes you stronger?
I don't believe this to be true
Cause at times I don't know what to do
So as I stare upon this reflection
Straight opposite of perfection 
But I have to start somewhere 
So I start here 
With the man in the mirror

I'm not gonna lie
At times when I'm alone
I cry
I shed a tear 
Or 2
And I feel like no 1
Understands what I'm going through 
But I have to keep my head up
And when I fall I have to get up
I was once told 
Not everything that shines
Is gold
And just because you have someone
In your life doesn't mean they will
Always be there to hold
And just because I cry 
Doesn't mean I'm weak
And just because im silent
Doesn't mean the world can't 
Hear me speak
And action are louder 
Then words 
But what good are words
If they're never heard 
And how can we prepare for
The future 
Without studying the past
And how can I think about my next step
If I haven't finished my last
And how can someone be so close
But seem so far
Surrounded by people
And still feel alone
And the place where I lay my head 
Not feel like home
And how do they want me to lead 
If I have yet learn to follow
It's hard to swallow 
But maybe I'm doing everything wrong
All along
And they say with each ending
Comes a new beginning 
But it seems like with each beginning
There is always an ending
How could something so dear to me
Frighten me
Maybe the same way 
Dark things
Enlighten me
You know teach me 
All these thoughts go bye
In a blink of an eye
So yeah I'm not gonna lie 
I cry 
From time to time

My deepest fear is ....
not that I'm inadequate To loving you
It's  falling for you 
It's dealing with something so powerful 
That I can't control 
Can't contain or hold, Bend or fold 
something greater than you and me 
Something I can't see but I can feel With in me
It's scary falling not knowing 
Where you might end
Where this might lead 
Whether its real or fake
What I might have to give or take
It's being happy beyond imagine
Beyond comprehension 
It's being loved beyond measure 
It's having this to treasure
My deepest fear is .....
US .....

I'd rather be with you 
Cause what's two 
Without my one
subtracting my happiness 
Adds on stress
Which multiplies to me being a mess
And divides me in two
All this equals me without you

Dear God,
I write this letter to you
even if it never reaches you
Just know I write this with all my heart
even though our relationship has grown apart
I've made mistakes
little and great
fueled with anger and hate
I have so little faith
that I'll change
I hope you see it a different way
I hope I'm still your son
through all my sinful lies
I hope you can still hear my sinful cries

Take a shot for me
take a shot, take a shot
as the clock furthers with it's tick-tock
i drink my feelings away
I'm stuck on this one chapter
time to change the page
time to start fresh and brand new
each shot helps me forget you,
helps me get through
wash away the thoughts of picture perfect
now looking back criticizing it was it all worth it
was it all my fault
was I the reason our relationship came to a halt
was it doomed by default
naw it wasn't me
one, two, maybe three
take them for the memories
and let the cup replenish
and the bad times diminish
each sip let's my pain relinquish
as my cup begins to finish
I start to forget thee
but you
you'll remember me
so **** all the *******
and take a shot for me

This is the longest Night in all of history
no love, just hate to nurture me
bodies all around but yet so lonely

If it is your love in which I feed
then it is your love in which I need
your presence is what helps me survive
but it is your love that keeps me alive
Does this love ever end?
if so I wish this love a never ending begin
Or is this love for eternity?
if so i shall wish this love immortality
Does this love know no rest?
I promise to give this love my very best!

How could it be
that you just played with me
you act like you don't regret
ademas you won that stupid bet
you left me here all alone
and now I can't help but feel prone
open to the impurities
and scrutiny of love
and look what I've become
a horrible sight to see
but this is what you have done to me
only a product of bad loven

Beauty 
Is in the eyes of the beholder 
Told her she was cold
But the world is colder
Just glad I'm the one that gets to hold her
Told her if she ever need one she'd 
Always have a shoulder 
To cry , lean 
And to dream on 
I can see us walking on the beach 
The stars never been touch 
But it never hurt to reach 
Her smile one of her best qualities
No coincidence it matches her personality 
And you the one I wrote this for 
My words bring forth action
Never decor 
Written with compassion 
Hoping you realize your worth 
And so much more

Kiss me kiss me like you miss me
Hug me like you love me
Turn my wishes of fantasy
Into reality 
Help me bury my past 
Make the present last 
Although the future maybe 
Unclear to me 
I only wish to spend it with thee
So let me wish 
Wish upon a star 
That this love never seems too far
Out of reach
Be my happy never end
Your my other half and my friend
This undeniable love
Something close to me
The thing I hold dearly
To my heart 
Pure like sun rays 
Memorable days
Endless smile
Endless hugs
Just living in your presence 
Bathing in your essence 
When I dream I dream of this
How this is bless
And when I reminisce 
About love 
I reminisce 
About this one

Let me give you my sight
My heart
It might shine some light
On how we fell apart
This is hard to explain
Maybe in the past year I've gone insane
There's been times I know I've failed
I carry that shame
Irrelevant people who I'd rather not name
Came between
I analyze it everyday
Still can't find the exact moment
It became this way
It's possible I lost you long ago,
Why is it though you wont let go?
This road has been a rough one
Does it ever end?
Hope I dont remember that day
As vivid as the day it began
Not scared to lose love
Just scared to love again
I know I took you for granted
I admit it
But can you
Take responsibility for anything you do
We both have cause pain
We both will never be the same
We both played the game
We lost
What else is there to gain
But to both go insane
Both caught up in this maze
We call love
Look how messy this **** has become
Look at what we have done
This is only my side
My view of the ride
Now the question is, and will always be
Do we stop or continue to be ?
Do we cut all ties , do we give it another try?
Kinda want the pain to stop, kinda not
Still want to love you, kinda want to hate you
Mixed emotions
Four letters cause such a commotion
It's getting tough to deal
On this side
Didn't know I was solo on this ride, or am I?
Your wave frequency comes strong then weak
We've hardly talked in the past week
It's funny how others want to give me their love
But its always yours I seek
Honestly I think I'm just gonna give up
Never been the one to do so
Just think enough is enough

You and 
                                                 Me
Thru thick and thin
Thin thru thick
                                                 You
Stood here 
Stood your ground
You stuck around
                                                 The
Struggle and pain
And I still feel the same
                                                 Possibility 
As before 
I want more 
                                                 Of Us