I lay awake and wonder how you can miss holding someone you've never touched, taste lips you've never kissed, loved someone you've never met. I wonder how you can be so close to me yet so far across the earth. I wonder if when I'm awake at 4:27 am thinking of you, you're at lunch thinking of me. I wonder how I could go my whole life not knowing you existed, only to find that you do more than live. You opened a chamber locked in my heart, weakening my soul for you to fill me will love and knowledge of the fire within your eyes and fears behind your smile. Your beautiful body and curve of your nose exposed yourself to be loved; for me to love you harder than anyone before our time.
I feel like I have to force you to be my friend. You only talk to me when there is no one else around to talk to you. Every once in a while you tell me I'm you "best friend," and that you love me and love how I've stuck around when "no one else was there." Exactly. I have been here for you through everything. You should treat me like I actually mean something to you. I know it's hard for you to open up to people at first, but you have been in my life for a year now, and that is long enough for me to find out all your weird traits and childhood stories. So don't you dare say I make you "anxious," because we all know that's not the case. You're so fake. You led me on to believe you loved me for 9 months, then decided you were straight and never liked me, only to find out you were dating my first love. Why I'm still you're friend? Honestly I have no idea. Maybe because I was genuinely happy for those 9 months, and I fell in love. And I know it's hard to pretend you don't have a crush on someone, but when you're in love with someone who is supposed to be you're best friend.. that's impossible. I'm done.
From the time I was a little girl,
they warned me about
drugs and addiction,
but they forgot to warn me about one specific drug.
The drug that courses through my veins,
***** with my mentality,
seizes my life,
and leaves me feeling momentarily
The drug that is your smile,
you as a whole,
as a human being that is transformed into this chemical
that I inject into my bloodstream.
They should have warned me about that drug.
In August of this past year, I was hospitalized for suicidal interaction. After being in countless institutions and fits of screams, I have entered recovery. I may never be the same.. but there were a handful of people involved in my remission, and because of them, I am here today. I hope to open the minds of sick children and wandering adults. As a young girl, I have a bright future of writing and love.
This isn't exactly poetry, but I want to share with you about who I am. Please, if anyone out there needs some reason, I am always happy to talk(:
Whoever decided how poetry is written?
What lines have to rhyme?
How many syllables are necessary?
Epic, sonnet, eulogy, haiku..
Who the hell cares any who?
How about we just do what we do?
We paint the picture of love
The picture of death
Or even the painting of how butterflies don't see their own beauty
Whatever wonder, way, or hope
If you have passion,
Your poetry is enough for me.
The moon never asks to disappear
But still we live in constant fear
That it will go away and never come back
Leaving the world drenched in black
You're the star
I'm the darkest night
Rain runs down my face
As I'm walking all alone.
Not many people have been in my place
Where your house is not a home.