We seem to be roommates for life
With love and but more often strife

This is the vex:
Life with no ***

Our time here as husband and wife

Give me Nepenthe
To relieve the odd grief of

Sodden swollen days
Odd different ways

We need some forgetting
Of sadness and regretting

I shan’t regret thee, napenthe
For your welcome Elysian sway

The walls implode
The ceiling falls
The floor is no more

This is the new new
Not what we’ve known
That ship has flown

Adapt, adopt, improve
I always say; save it
For another day

Please, save me from home and our status quo zones
Where my dear and the misanthrope stay
Where sometimes is heard no dispiriting words
But the clouds are still cloudy all day

Home, home is so strange
Where my fear and the forlorn hope lay
Where is often is heard many recurring words
And I need to go outside and play

We are all
Hungry hungry
Hippos

In Buddha’s boat
Staying afloat:safe
For tomorrow

I’m slipping through time again
From the when to then
From tomorrow’s sorrow
To today’s begin

The real ***** is the stitch
Where we actually exist
Between memory and wonder
And therein lies the itch

Remembering the past
Thinking of next
Wallowing in now
Sliding the narrow

They spread fast
Across the blue dot
With impact to last
In the end a blot

Planet plagued
Tyrannosaurus
Age through age
The virus are us

I was mid-sentence
of a hazy-crazy
argument with her;
spittle sprayed with
unguarded gesticulations
when a butterfly landed
on my finger that was
slashing toward her.
First, I seethed.
Then, froze and
stopped breathing as
I watched gentle flickering
of her beautiful wings.
Delicate things
What was I splaying?
I didn’t matter anymore.
Just stuff to sort later.

I’ll never play checkers
  with my dad again
Can’t go back to that
  place or when

I remember being
  sick at six
But mom knew soup
  and other tricks

[here’s where you think
  of who/what you lost
both the gain and/or
  the precious cost]

We’re on a time slide
  What a ride!
    Only towards
       So look forward

3 cups dandelion greens
A quarter cup of water
1 waxed sleeve of saltines, crushed
A pinch of coriander
A pinch of curry
A stintch of ginger
Any remaining salt
Stir into a slurry
Serve with appropriate liquid

I reach down
And what is gone is
An identity fluidity to
Engender remember

Inney or outy
Is our infinity?
No. Flexibility
Today, he
Tomorrow…

Regrets? I’ve had a few
I’ve done a lot; what's more to do?

I haven’t seen the northern lights
Or seen earth from sub-orbital flight

I never saw a show at the Apollo
Can you dig it? Do you follow?

I never asked a boy to me kiss
Nor ate the cheeks of a blowfish

I haven’t climbed Kilimanjaro
(But I could still do that tomorrow)

But then again…

I threw myself from an aero plane
So, I don’t need to do that again

I zip-lined a mile chasm in Costa Rica
And hot-ballooned over Tlacochahuaya

I’ve been a nudist in Albuquerque
Yes, those that know, I am that quirky

Crossed crevasses to the South Pole
And flung myself into the future solo

Regrets? I’ve had a few
But far, far more adventures, too

49.3: Sustainability
      -b.2d: yoghurt
          • easy peasy!
          • scrape container
          • soft boil milk *(see Fu.2)
          • mix remains
          • wrap, keep warm, covered
                = several hours
                = viola!
                = yoghurt!

                          

                                * [Fu.2 -> get cow]

To know you are a sinner
Is to be a winner

More important than wrong
Is the penitent song

Not heavenly forgiveness
but to be witness

To admission to the
Loved one wronged

Absolution?

Totally up to them

You can only know
Approaching a
Black hole
That the event horizon
Is compelling

An insidious abyss
The black maw
As you fall
And then, “Catch!”
You hate her smile

No,

You love it

Today I lost my ****
I did; that’s all is it?
Older and bolder?

No, just lost my ****
Not bolder,  just older
Not good with it

I lost my ****
This is it
I’m old

It lands with a thud
No hello, no “can I come in?”

Depression

Come on! Buck up man!
Get that off your back!

That’s your impression?

Change the channel?

Put on a fresh shirt and smile?

It doesn’t work that way
Not for some while

“A yam is a yam” said Sam
As I am who I am

And I am what I can, I said
“A good scam!” said Sam

Overcome the span
If maybe we can

Slap it, cap it
Snap it, trap it

Then we began
The save it plan

What? I’m aghast!
S/He doesn’t have a podcast?

How do we knows
Which way s/he flows?

I like what s/he says
Should really be prez

But w/o social tweets
Who truly competes?

Tell me, tell me Facebook
Which way should I look?

Lockstep in totality
In our virtual reality

I have been to the top of the hill
Thinking as a hero

I’ve crashed into the ditch
My power never lower

Mostly, in-between
Taking all as it seems

Bored Sisyphus
Doing daily things

But some moments
Define time for action

Et–hem; that time is now

Buenos días
Hoy es sábado aquí
Hoy es domingo allí en Australia
Hoy es በማንኛውም ቀን
En el Planeta Próxima

El sol salió hace 15 minutos
No veo ¿Que?
Esta detras de las nubes
Pero sabe estas allí
¿Porque?
Se lo que se.

Sé que cada día es un milagro.
Sé que para ser amado,
Necesitas amar
Sé que soy amado porque
Te amos

Extraño mi perro
Extraño mi padre
Extraño mi madre

I don’t miss my friends
I long for them, puedo
Keep them close

“To miss” is a powerful verb
Missing a lovely mystery
Being missed is wistful

ERROR CODE 6034:
Undeliverable: philosophical differences

ERROR CODE 6035:
Philosophy incompatible

ERROR CODE 6038:
Indiscernible philosophy

ERROR CODE 6070:
Not detected

ERRIR CDE 666
ah funny Hugh much Nih had

DELIVERED

My hellcat wiffled and wharbled
As I fell through space
Dodging enemy discharge.

“Dispatch; status!”
“Status nominal. Dismissal eminent.
Dispersal advised.“

Swerving left and up, I
cut thrusters and
Bit down on the tube, hard.

All wrong, all gone as I dispersed.
I smelled peaches.
I saw a nascent sunset.

I might have puked.
Then it was over.
I took off the gloves,

lifted the visor and
Detached all sensors.
I needed electrolytes, stat..

Later, I checked my gradis.
I had died twice, virtually of course
But gained only 67 credits.

Somewhere, though,
Lives were lost
That actually happened.

“It’s on,” she said,
as she slid her hands
into her stirrups.

I countered with a hearty “Harf!”
and jumped aboard my steeley steed.
The klaxon clanged
and we were off.

I rounded the first turn inside,
scraping the turnstile.
She laughed heartily as
she glided swiftly by.
Suddenly, smoke and
screeching terrors!

Aluaurms sounded
Medicaloes swooped
swarming with pinging lights strobing
.
My steed whinnzied and shuddered
I swooped around and sloped down.
As I puttered to a stop,
she emerged from the twisted,

Ok’d.

That day, no one shivel lost,
but she had won!

What did she feel
As she clicked her heels
Dorothy over the rainbow?

Simple winner’s elation?
A dubious jubilation
Ennui; sodden sorrow?

Ding, ****, murderess
Dog, scarecrow distress
Walking the yellow narrow

Waking quaking with them
Neighbors, uncles and aunt Em
Fortold with cards Tarot

A heart made of tin?
Working wizard’s sin?
Deep in the marrow?

Good witch switch
Knowing bad from which?
Leaving only sorrow

How could she know
Tracks of lion’s sorrow
After that tomorrow

This is my body
I pick at and scratch
To rearrange the strange

It’s an eternal assault
This war between
My skin and me

Keep napkin a
Or tissue near
There will be blood

Pick and pick and pick
Argument against free will
She says “Stop!” Can I?

You see me hide the scars
And think it strange
I’m embarrassed

I own this neurosis
While I can’t stop it
It won’t stop me

And then one day it happened.
Not one gun was used, nor knife.
There was not a mass shooting;
no one was killed.

Not s car hit a pedestrian,
not even by accident.
No deaths by heroine overdose
nor by fentanyl were recorded.

No one committed a ****** crime
against anyone.
Doors opened for indigents
and immigrants.

It became more strange:

Truth was spoken everywhere,
even on Fox News.
Corrupt leaders abdicated—
get this—even Trump!

Acrid air cleared, waters too
and salmon swam upstream to spawn.
The earth cooled half a degree,
over the rainbow.

Line three thrummed;
bisectional translateral
segments echoed sympathetically.

Eyes one through nine
snapped open
as all legs were put on high alert.

I proceeded down lines
two through five cautiously
to see what was disrupting.

What was I fractually perceiving??
Food, yes; but what—
The fly (but what? half a fly?)

twisted and twirled in my web a
s the homunculus shouted,
and the hairs on my legs tingled in horror,

as I heard, “heeelp meeee!”

The screech was unimaginable.
Forget fingernails on chalk,
this was far worse.
We hunkered down
behind concrete slabs
as skëūäįęßás screamed above us
as dïønš scanned with flickering florescence.
I glanced to Diego hoping he’d get it.
Chick-schlick-pa-pa-pa-pow!
He did.

Exhausted, I slid down,
as the spent clip clinged away.
We were safe for another day.

Beneath the fabric
Covering her eyes
Tears puddle and flow

Arms tired, spirit disgraced
The scales list dangerously
Sword lies discarded

Her constitution weak
Battered by righteous fools
This is how justice dies

I have a hundred words
to decide what to do.

If I ask and she accepts,
well then, that’s a complicated novel
and game over.

I don’t know.
If I don’t ask,
it will always just be a poem
of longing and regret;
and who wants that?

I could equivocate, stall,
pad out the proposal
with flowery propositions
and run-on sentences
with irrelevant red herrings
and perhaps a false dilemma or two
but in the end
how could that eventuate
a more acceptable outcome?

Sigh.

Buck up, man.
It’s only words.
Do it; do it now:
“Paula, will you…?”

“What was your card?”
“The queen of hearts”
I tossed the withhold deck and
palmed her as she squirmed.
The cards fluttered as my hand
crossed my face it
landed between my lips.
I plucked it forth with a flourish
and pronounced,
“This card?”

There were sounds of astonishment
and tumultuous applause.
I felt sick as I bowed and
left the stage, dejected.
The tiny queen squirmed in my pocket.
A sulfur stench assailed me
as I entered my dressing room.
He sat crossed-kneed, red, scowling,
the end of his barbed tail thumping.
“Not good enough. Try again .“

Days, months of hot brown
Walking around here, there

I wake with a poem of home
Far from the familiar fog

Missing the mist and rain
Missing the wet and green

Full moon tonight in Oaxaca
It’s full too, in Freshwater

Don’t forget us, gatos
We will be home and wet soon

02/08/2020
Oaxaca, Mexico

There once was a
Grand Old Party
Formed against slavery
The Free Soil party

Defenders of the constitution
And the omnibus declaration
First to be President:
Abraham Lincoln

The 20s were the
Republican decade
Harding, Coolidge and Hoover
A decade sadly a century past

A temporal chasm loomed
Until conservative hero
Former democrat Reagan
Trickled up the elephant’s trunk

Take eye of Newt
And two from Bush
Alchemy trickery: viola kazam!
The great bamboozle began

It’s no longer conservatism
No longer less federalism
A horrible takeover
This GOP makeover

Fend for self
Wall off power
Distort report
All else enemy

Walk lock-step
Repeat refrain
Us not them
Say it again

My senator father
Is spinning in his grave
Fox in the henhouse
This Mitch debprave

“Compass?”
“Check.”
“Matches?”
“Check.”
“Maple syrup?”
“Check.”
“Swiss Army Knife?”
“What do you think?”
It was on.
With shouldered packs we set off.
The acorns were scarce at first
but more plentiful later.
Waters roared from recent rains.
Wildflowers were glorious!
I gathered some violets.
Then shelling, leaching, drying and
grinding the bitter nutmeats.
Fire on, cast iron oiled and
the first cakes were poured.
The judges seemed astonished.
We smiled.
First prize in the second only
backwoods pancake contest.
Pete thought it was the syrup
we made in Vermont.
I knew it was the violets.

Did she really mean that?
What was that snarky smirk?
What the **** does that mean?
I can’t believe he just said that!
Does that mean that…

Here’s a chill pill
Don’t think the worse
Get over your brain strain
Move on to restrain
Here’s a new refrain

Surprise: more than you
No one aspires to conspire
Antagonists might be protagonists
Think better of everyone
Beatles: “All you need is…”

It was late. The coffee was past tense with only adrenaline left.
“There!” Bernard whispered.
I lifted my night-visions.
“See it?”
“Yeah, I see it.”
“Easy.” Bernard exhorted.
I replaced the binoculars with the gun. The sight was strong enough to compensate. Moments were painfully long as my finger slowly tensed.
“Pffffift!”
It was done! Target acquired! The Carfentanil did its work and the tons of meat hit with a thud.
We jumped from the Jeep to the specimen. It was breathing.
“Good. This is one species of rhino that won’t go extinct on my watch” I grinned.

And then she said, "No way, José!” But I did. I pulled back on the stick and quickly entered the new coordinates. We bounced off the atmosphere in an amazing collision of colored lights and gees. The warning blares hurt but she quickly muted them. Our frail capsules did what they should and our slingshot past Mars put us ahead. “Hang on,” I said, “this will be tricky.” Two pulses red, one violet, and then, finally, green. I threw up. She didn’t. But we had won.

And that’s when Larry arrived. Sheila freaked and dropped her tequila. We tried not to noticed but then Juan chortled as most of us feigned indifference. It didn’t help matters that the shattering glass made Sheila’s Pomeranian yelp in a distinctly manic manner. Others tried to suppress giggles but soon we were all laughing. We couldn’t stop. When the Roomba from its niche tried to sweep up the glass, it was over. Time out. Sheepishly, Larry dropped to one knee. Before he could propose, Elsa, the Pomeranian, bit his hand, hard. Yeah; it went into the Roomba.

I’m having
Kerning yearnings
Finding space between

Space is or is not
Too close is too close
I know that’s just your elbow

Too far is too far
Can’t hear can’t see
Eye before he except after she

Let us learn from letters
Some need to be closer
Some need to breathe

Not even hello, though?
When you go, you’re gone?
Close the door behind?

That’s the brand
In until you’re not
Then just mist

Don’t bang at gates
Always forever locked
Regroup, regain, retain

There once was a boy from Eureka
Not Kansas nor even Topeka
He took stock of life
Went off with his wife
To kayak in Lake Tanganyika

I wish life had subtitles
Or at least a Babel fish
Deep in my ear
To hear…everyone

Or a translator universal
As Seen in all series Trek:
Denobulan, Klingon, Ferengi:
I’d buy that for a dollar!

Walls fall
Borders borrando
I think I’d like a
Lingua Franca

We are roommates
But no longer lovers
As we once were though
Thoroughly married still

I love her, my not lover
Who does not share my bed
Even as we share our dreams
For the rest of life it seems

We will conquer the world
Traversing indifferent distance
Always returning home
To hearth home and them

The cinders of eros cold
We both grow old
Gnarled vines entwined
The fruit makes good wine

An ambulance mourns and wails
Someone down in this town

Church bells chime at all times
Weddings, masses, memorials

“BRRROUOOGH! GAS! OAXACA!”
On every street on every morning

Smaller, stiller sounds; listen:
Cooing doves in jacarandas

Silent dogs on rounds;
Stealthy, not needing us

Squeals, peals of children
Skating, biking in the park

Schnack-fwack brush
Of shoeshiners

Twhick—shwick—thwick
Of fastidious street sweepers

Traffic, thrumming always
The humming of Oaxaca

Line in the BIG sand
With the TERRORIST Iran
Because Sam I am

Knight’s Queen to Bishop three
The ignorant king decreed
Knowing not the board nor game

Irritated red, readily arrogant
He lets cawing crows fly
Their screech a presage of war

We need balance and check,
Mate; a jester gesture at least
Righteous pawns invoking Hoyle

There are rules to the game
Denied, defied not checked
End in shame and blame

A graceful pirouette towards death
With each and every waking breath
The ****** dance of being alive

The stank of floral perfumes
As memories expand and fade
Exotic as cinnamon and jade

We create and extinguish realms
Thinking we’re at the helm with
Joyous and dire exultation

Walking up the spiral trail
All below us is known
Above, oblivious bliss

Mind the gap
Tween want and need

Go somewhere else
Where you are alien

Taste the world
Outside your zone

Practice the language
The necessary one

Kindness to strangers
Cross the boundaries

Find the map
That turns from greed