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Dream within a dream within a dream
Nothing is what it seems
Problems and consequences wants
Nothing more to float away
Like a feather caught in a breeze
Love wants to be a part of the picture
But it fades out too quickly to realize
What's going on
All the love lost
Thinking this could of been the one
Just another dream
Was it all meant to be
Was it exactly the way it was
Suppose to go down
I never wanted to intentionally
Hurt anyone
Life just fades out and returns to a dream
Once again a dream within a dream.
A dream.
Can someone please wake me up?
Beauty is worth seeing and there is a lot of beauty out there to see. A lot of ugliness too and I have been through stages of feeling so depressed I just felt like I didn't want to exist anymore. But closing my eyes and thinking about my daughter definitely put me in a better mood. What is that but beauty in a nutshell
Sitting alone in a room without you
How did it end up this way
I wasn't the best thing for you
But I was always there for you
I wouldn't turn my back on you
You turned your back on me
Not once, not twice, you just kept at it
No matter what I did or didn't do
You showed no interest in me
Then it got me thinking
That you never loved me to begin with
Was just using me like I was using you
It's funny how things like that unfold
So how can I be angry at you
You was just doing your thing
Like I was trying to figure out things
Where I stood with you
If I even loved you
You just stuck around cause
Of self-preservation
I get that. Not angry at that
Well, a little angry because of that.
But how easy it was for you to turn
Your back on me.
The pain, the pain, the pain
Why did it come to me
Visit me like the night
Enveloping my sleepy eyes
It was once slightly better than this
But then the pain came
Hasn't gone away for months
I try to make things beautiful again
Like a rose blooming in springtime
How beautiful can it be?
I am just as curious as you
Does God send out the pain
To see if I can handle it
I want no God like that
There has to be something better
Somehow, some way, something more to it
Better than these words
I love words
It's definitely a poetry about it all
Maybe the pain can get caught in these words
Disappear in between sentences
My mind is cluttered
And I feel like ****
All I want is to feel better
But everyday is a struggle
Struggle to get up in the morning
And stay awake
All I want to do is sleep my life away
My depression has me in its grips
Wanting to cloud everything
And make it dark
I want to break free
And smile once again
Even faith as tiny as a mustard seed can be a spark
But most days I plug along
Hurting inside with these dark emotions
Wishing I could just disappear
Be forever lost in the nothingness
Though I know the Universe isn't out to get me
I need good vibes to win me over to the lighter side
I have to stay focus on what is right
And that's love will conquer all
Love of life
Love of family
Love of a pet even
They're no friends of mine
Why would I want that in my life
All they bring is misery and pain
Nothing but bullies
I get lost in the rain
Trying to escape
Escape the suffering
I want something better
Something tangible and real
Though it wouldn't be smart to think I can get away from pain.
It's always going to be out there. Waiting.
It's how I handle it is what's going to be sane
Maybe these bullies, society who are dum about mental illness and try to make things harder on me, are ****** in the head. They're the head cases that need the help. But I'm still going to be me, that's all I have, I can't trust no one else, and they ain't going to ******* change that.
Splintered emotions
Falling away from oneself
Can't undo the past
Though it's revisited of every minute
Of everyday.
Try to think of positive things
but that's few and far between
Especially when you're almost down for the count Others see this and try to take advantage
Of the fact you're depressed, that I am depressed.
Stigmitism runs deep and hollow souls try to make it worse. They want us to lose it. They get a kick out of it. It makes them happy because they have no life of their own. They're just plain ******* bullies. They would rather pry in your life than take care of their own. Their intentions are felt by us. We're the ones that get their baggage cause they can't go a day without making fun of us.
They're a useless bunch.
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