I didn't read for a long time
It reminded me too much of you
Every book I picked up
Felt like a shard of glass
Piercing into my stomach

I've spent quite some time
Trying to figure out
Why you would leave me
What I did wrong

It wasn't until a month ago
Nearly two years after the breakup
That I figured out
I didn't do anything wrong
I loved and loved
But you weren't ready

I feel as though
If we were to meet for the first time
Today
Things will be different
Maybe we could have made this last

I spent months
Trying to avoid anything that reminded me of you
But that meant shutting the world out
I threw my books everywhere
I couldn't take the pain

I started reading a new book today
I'm trying to heal

I remember the day dad brought you home.
You were barking and jumping after that plastic bone.
Your eyes met mine and your tongue found my face.
You were my first real friend that couldn't be replaced.

We spent the days running and dancing around the trees.
You were always the first to come when I skinned my knees.
When I jumped in the lake you'd run along the shore.
And then you'd catch a scent and run off to explore.

During my early teenage years girls entered my mind.
I know you waited by the window under the blinds.
But even though I barely even scratched your ears.
You stayed by my side during those troubled years.

As I packed up my things to start my college life.
I turned around to notice you with a tear in your eye.
Memories flooded my head with the good times together.
We looked at each other and knew we'd be friends forever.

A few years later I received a call that twisted my head.
My dad said that you'd fallen ill and would soon be dead.
They took you to the vet to try to find a helpful answer.
After all the poking and tests they said that you had cancer.

Well I came home to visit you during your final days.
I could tell the end was near by your distant gaze.
Although you were seconds away from heaven's place.
You lifted your head just to have a last lick of my face.  

Now that I'm married and have a kid who's turned ten.  
It's time to head to town to start the cycle again.
I can't wait for his eyes to light up when I come in the door.
It'll be one of those memories that I'll remember forever more.

sometimes you get tired.
of waiting for happiness to sprout inside of you again, no matter how many "fun" things you go out and do.
of those comments drowning out the thoughts in your own head until you yet again, go numb inside.
sometimes you get tired of watching people talk about other people,
for no better reason but to, make them feel better about their miniscule, petty little egos,
of people being cowards,
of people thinking that hey this won't matter in 20 years.
of people thinking
that picking on someone everyday won't change their entire being,
their entire future,
life, happiness, love
of believing that its okay to be in agreement with the general opinion of our decaying society, just to be thought of as "cool".
of thinking mediocrity is something to be proud of.
hey sometimes you get tired.
of people.
of their lack of effort.
of their ignorance.
of their ****.
of people thinking it's okay to sit there and watch someone get beaten down by somebody who's really just as fragile on the inside.
sometimes you get tired.
of society's disregard for any kind of just act.
a moral code.
sometimes you get tired of it all.
sometimes you can't take it anymore.
and sometimes
you just get so **** tired of it **ALL

my hair a halo,
veins rivers wielding through,
my face a solar system,
skin like milk,
knees are the dunes,
eyes hold the ocean,
mouth contains the storm,
tongue hailing down,
purple under eye bags, same as winter clouds,
this is my body,
sometimes I wonder how