amanda

amanda Oct 2020

you do not get to
call me

magical

brilliant

stunning

you do not get to
turn those beautiful words
into a consolation prize

you lost the right
to love me
the moment you chose her

amanda Oct 2020

you're afraid

you're afraid
of how far you'd fall
if you jumped

you're afraid
i wouldn’t catch you

you're more afraid
i would

everything about
a future with me
scares the **** out of you

because you're a smart man

amanda Oct 2020

dead end

so i just sit here
parked at this dead end
of a relationship

because it's still
the most beautiful road
i've ever taken

amanda Oct 2020

same state

at least now we both exist
in the same state

confusion
heartbreak
yearning
virginia

i love being
this close to you

even if we’re worlds apart

amanda Oct 2020

collapse

i guess we finally
found out

we can't both fall
and not collapse

the second
you started having
feelings for me

we started cracking

i was afraid of that

amanda Oct 2020

insomnia

i’m grateful for the nights
i can’t sleep
for the time i get to spend
with the stars—
none of us knowing
why we have to exist
in the dark,
but choosing to shine anyway

4am and counting

amanda Oct 2020

it’s not your fault

it’s not your fault
that he needed
two women
to make him happy

it’s not your fault
that she met him first

it’s not your fault
that you refuse to be second