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Don't you hate it when you constantly tear yourself down, more and more each day; but there's nothing you do or say, nothing but radio silence.. as our minds are at peak, trying to create a better image for our eyes to see; and for our hearts and souls to love..needing Some way to put our minds at ease; something that makes us feel like we're in our own little escape.. something that isn't a misconception of our minds, that isn't a worded mishap of failure.. something or someone that helps build us up, not tear us down.. sometimes it's the vibration of music that we play so loudly to drown out our thoughts... or it may be watching t.v or hanging out with friends to distract ourselves from feeling.. tricking us into thinking we're okay.. when we're clearly not.. sometimes we sleep to avoid pain and that sickening pit in your stomach when we wake up.. sometimes we just stare blankly .. as if we weren't there .. and we just sit and we think.. we feel numb.. so numb..and in that moment you feel "fine" and at that moment.. your mind tricks you and you feel "okay" once more.. and it's a repetitive cycle.. day in and day out.. you think.. you worry.. you cry.. and you're in pain, emotionally torn.. just to find out later that you want to feel " okay " so badly that you ignore everything and everyone around you.. open your eyes and realize what is and what isn't real..who is there for you and who is not.. who is willing to do anything in their power to make sure you're okay at the end of the day..Notice the little things.
 May 2016 J Ray
Aeerdna
creep
 May 2016 J Ray
Aeerdna
Today I cannot write,
my soul crawling in  misery
I have a lump in my throat
and all I can do is fight the wish
to cut it out.

At the end of my fingertips
the words are dying
as I touch them with my red nails
and in my mind I am slowly realising
that the world is not the place
where I belong.

I'm a misfit,
a creep ,
my ugliness  building walls in my soul,
my eyes are bleeding,
while in my heart I am still wondering
whether I deserve to be loved.

upon myself the sky cries
icy teardrops
cracking up my brain
my skin hurts
and in my soul
the answer to my question is a big NO.

*No, love will never find its road towards my soul.
 May 2016 J Ray
Gidgette
I was raised up a Southern Baptist,
Never missed a Sunday
There I'd be, fourth row back
To hear what the preacher would say
He preached of pearly gates,
Streets paved with gold
He said we'd see our passed loved ones
And treasures we would behold
He spoke of damnation should we stray
In the lake of fire there to dwell
But honestly, I always thought,
I'd have to die to go to hell
I'm not trying to offend or make a religious statement of any kind. Just a sour mood expression;)
 Apr 2016 J Ray
Gidgette
We are none truly alone,
I've written of this before
I shall write of our souls
And the invisible chains, once more

We are all connected,
By these universal chains
From the beggar on the corner,
To the broker squandering gains

We are seven billion shades,
Different shades of the same hue
From me here in my mountains,
Across the earth to you

Whether you're a dancer,
Stepping to a tune
Or a night fisherman,
Gathering food, under the moon

These universal chains,
They bind us each together
That's what the universe wanted,
And so it is forever

Each time you defame,
Your fellow human across the way
You're defaming part of yourself,
So be careful what you say

This is how its been since the beginning
This is how it is until the end
Be kind to each other,
Remember we're all akin
Oh wow! Thank you my fellow poets. Thank you for reading and liking my words.<3
 Apr 2016 J Ray
Cindy Gaeta
every night,
is so lonely without you here.
i sleep curled up in a ball on one side of the bed, and when i turn in the opposite direction, the coldness of the sheets rubs up against my skin. i turn away immediately,
for in that moment it clicks.
you are no longer mine.
 Apr 2016 J Ray
js
Untitled
 Apr 2016 J Ray
js
Women are like cigarettes.

When I'm finished with each,
I think about the other
while I stare at
their butts . . .
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