As I run away
Thoughts overtaking me
I've signed off for good
Hating how much I need you

But you find me
With your busted finger
Resentfully childish
And everything that I've ever needed

World of lines, there lies special curves
Of random life, yet
Mathematically precise
Able beyond measure
Nothing short of perfection

To live as a darling throwaway
As you fulfill your harrowing
"dreams"

Dreams wishing to play hideaway
You'll be sure to hear my
"SCREAMS"

Alone
I have been
For all of this time

Angry
I became
For there was silence

But I
Mistaken
Consumed with terror

Could not
See the rest
Hidden in plain sight

Enclosed
Your picture
Among the china

At once
I could feel
Your understanding

At last
I could know
We have each other

So close I can feel it
All around
I am reaching ******
All the way
My heart swallowed by you
All of it
Your love encompassing
All of me
I tremble at the thought
All the time
You want me forever
All 'your days
Instead I find the lies
All too quick
Consuming me blindly
All I see
It's truthfully tragic
All in all

You want to give it all

But what if........

Is it better to love in the midst of entire uncertainty?

Is it better to merely survive in the midst of certain security?

She was never one for ensuring her own death..

She was also never one to be anything but in love with everything around her to the most extreme of all extremes.

It's the same thousand year old story
On a continuous loop
Spinning out of control
Yet too familiar to be unrecognizable

The same beginning...

She doesn't merely embody beauty
She is a very real piece of it
She is the dust floating through space
Breathing life into all within her reach
A Queen

The same middle...

Her enchantment must be squashed
The fate of it all rests on her shoulders
The weight of it crushing her womb
She births the men of the world
Men who represent humanity
Undeservingly

The same end...

The world cannot go on
Not without her ultimate sacrifice
And the many others along the way
She trades pleasure for heroism
Love for security, and all the rest

In the end
The only phrase the people can muster
For the queen, mind you
All of the queens of the world

Off with her head!

Wah wah, poor little me
I've done it again
But there's no hope for me

Wah wah, poor little me
A girl mysterious and private
Who cares? Look at me

Look how well I open your door
I ******* up your face some more
I love you even though you're a *****
Watch me put my heart on the floor

Wah wah, love me in weakness
But I love you, I do!
Wait...
I told the "KK" your secrets

Soreness

               here...

Shame

               her...

Space

               he...

Silence

               h...

Sorrow

               ...

Infinite space all around
Still, you walk right into me
Making me feel as if I have no right
To exist in my pocket-sized corner of space
Awareness gives way to mortification
Hands disappear into pockets
Pockets disappear into nothing
I am made nothing in my pockets
My pocket-sized corner of space

You move to action
Through fleeting moments of inspiration
Only to have such a gem stripped away
By the chaos that is the world

It is not easy to swallow
To have gone all this time
Believing progress to be
The result of perfect harmony

It is the opposite that is true
Our existence made possible
By the colliding of infinity
None of it being the same

So with every learning moment
All of the time spent outside of yourself
I will fight to further the limits
You've spent your entire life cutting short

Please don't fade away
For the world needs your chaos too

The feelings I hid away
You wanted them
But I know the best for you
And they would **** you

I've always known the best for you
And that's why you sent me away
But the sorrow that consumes me hole
I cannot feel today

I turn to you in hopes that I
Can continue on without
These feelings that I hid away
But ****, they demand to be felt

I'm in a place I've been before
The one that most don't survive
But she is here, she put herself here
That never was a surprise

She turns to me, in hopes that she
Can continue on without
The guilt she tries to hide away
By filling me with doubt

A future, safety, all of the things
The things not set in stone
Begin to slowly fade away
Before I could make them my own

She looks at me, words on her tongue
I'm scared for what is to come
"We have to stay away from her"
"It's him, she has become"

Just rip my heart from my chest
I'd rather feel that instead
Cause the one thing I knew for sure
Was that he'd never get in my head

Everything about it
It was all so perfect
Yet I could see the end
From the very beginning
It was all so heavy

Your love for me
Was enough to end me
The seas you crossed
Unfortunately
You're so heavy

I could have been fine
That would not have been me
I absorb all things unseen
Unfortunately
I'm so heavy

It was all so flattering
Until I felt you behind me
Hurling machinery in anger
In your love
You almost took my life

I'm left feeling terrified
In my hatred for all of it
Yet the walking bass line
That I love so much
I can't even hear it
Without a sense of longing

It was all too heavy

So cold, I know you can't believe it
Sometimes you gotta face the feeling
When you don't care if you get up again
There's a thousand things I will not understand
How you dealing with the hell I put you through?
If I had my way I would be right there next to you
There's certain things in life you cannot change
There's certain things

I hope you know I care

I've been alone too many nights
Too proud to tell you when you're right
A little patience would have helped me then
A lot like the break has been the common standard
All the angels above the earth I prayed
Send this message right into his head
There's certain things in life I cannot take
And I will wait

I hope you know I care

This pain
All encompassing
A strange filth
That I can't wash off
I mean how
How could I possibly
Ever see
All of those buildings
All of those hallways
All of those streets
That library
Without instantly melting
Into the ground
Where I belong
Where my purpose lies

I am the abelias

We are not alone
and although it is uncertain
It is something we just know
We are not the strongest, nor the smartest
For it just cannot be
Yet in the midst of our downfall
We possess the power to find infinite beauty

I love the people
'Specially the helpless ones

I cried real hard
When you fell off your bike

What's a miss like me doing
Hoisting little round ones?

How can such a hōre
Have a place in this world?

When there isn't even a place
In her own home.