They called him a delusional because he told the truth. Ever since he called them on their lies now they are mad. Trying to talk bad about him like it's justified. What's worse is family he stood tall for them and they wouldn't even look out for him.
Never to his face always behind his back. He had better things going on than wasting time with people who made up their mind about him. He stopped caring walked away. Still talking thinking they are right. He wanted to get away from it all.

Years of shutting off emotions and feelings held on. Feeling numb and depressed because things didn't happen or turn out accordingly. Still in the pursuing a dream, doing what he likes loves trying to bring it together.
Looking for yourself in the work being part of the material. Who he was and what he's becoming in the future.

After a long day of hard labor
He would put on 80s music get lost in the moment
While writing in his journal he would reflect
Organize all the clutter within his mind
So much he wanted to do with his limited time
Learning to slow down always in a rush on the go
He listened to his body since it ached with tenderness the pain of an older body that had limits
After years of commitment, they did not hold up their end of the of the deal
Diving into head first without hesitation he began to feel taken forgranted
He was hardworking professional while opportunity passed
He applied but never given an interview
There was always work but wanted to be in one location instead of bouncing around to multiple places.

Found peace talking about it able to concentrate. Focus on living things that matter. The past is history you cant change it thinking about it becomes a roadblock detours to get blessings. Its not meant to be a hard connect to grasp process so many obsessions causing confusion. So many distractions others imposing and projecting these bad ideas concepts that you don't agree with. Things that have nothing to do with yo I labels so others will think less of you. All these voices don't matter the only one voice in your head.

Hanging by the jacuzzi trying to relax unwind always on the go busy at work no time for a social life. Had a beer or two for a buzz not getting wasted or smashed self destruction isolated pity party.
Having fun socializing with the crowd instead of being antisocial usually anti establishment. Working on being better than losing it over people who don't value or care about you.

Hip hop made me strong
Thinking how life use to be easier
From a curious youth to a overwhelmed adult
Dating was fun, an adrenaline rush
Now it's like I end up with the same person
Different body same crazy mind set
Another person I'll probably regret
Moving on is hard full of regret
Might be right for me
Might be wrong for me
Never know since it won't go anywhere
One minute we are talking
Now she's talking to someone new
Can't get mad she's not mine and never belonged to me
She's ****** when she sees me talking to a female friend
She jumps to conclusions but still doing her thing
She don't want me but don't want me with anyone else

Didn't get social cues right away
They opened up or kept him out
Another day working for it
Another way to get it done
Told them he loved them they ran away
Didn't say how he felt heart in conflict
Didn't feel the same way back

Bouncing ideas off others to grow
Some give feed back
While others give look at you like you're weird
Hearing it out loud thinking about the next move
Been around different crowds always their person
But they aren't mine we grew apart seeing friends like family
To be treated like a distant friend

Always been into hard work saying it will pay so many road blocks and detours but chasing a dream. Its the worse when you try and it never turns out in my head of accordingly. Building off the experience learning from the encounter. Thought this would work didn't want a boss but a team to make film and get my scripts/sketches made.
Always open to creative ideas trying to make them a reality. Never seen as an equal but working twice as hard.

You say funny stuff because it's true. Writing it down being open and awesome with people. They don't always agree but that's opinion. Sleep patterns are jacked. Always seeking inspiration love to create it comes to life before these eyes.
Changes are part of life open to grow learn how to do it and be better at it. Use to tell sad stories wrestle with the struggle don't want to do it anymore. Lots of change for the right for the better. Got over trying to fix the bad seeing beauty in others if they settle that's on them.

Standing in the hot sand the ocean breeze hits my face. The sound of the ocean waves crashing. The sound of laughter people playing in the sand splashing in the water. You touch your toes in the cold water the tide rises to your ankles. The you walk close as the water moves up your leg debating to jump in or walk till the water consumes your body. Water is waist level the worse part is water on your back but once the refreshing water take you in you become immune. The tide pulls you in but will release you. The end of the day the tide tossed and pushed you around feeling drained exhausted but a much needed Beach day so it will talk all the stress and worries away.

Once you sober up you see who your true friends are. When you get clean they don't call you anymore. You try to hang but it's not the same. Alcohol was the only way you can bond with this person. They made you feel guilty for not drinking but they felt bad because they were drinking. You respected one another's decisions and departed. Once you get clean you feel empowered not to be self destructive but become more creative not so angry finding other outlets for misplaced aggression.
After while you find courage to do what matters no more liquid courage that gives you false hope no more waking up hung over after a long night of drinking till you black and don't remember what happen or hearing about all the crazy you did while recovering from a hang over.
Stay clean and sober clarity of mind no going back not about that anymore. The right people stay while all the wrong leave you.

Taking their insults like bullets
The knife from backstabbing remains
Absorbing all the pain and hurt
Letting it die within rising above hate
Instead of inflicting the toxic on others
Saving the day filling the void
Gave it to god and prayed to survive
Staying strong bouncing back
The fire within burned out
Revived from the chaos not going back

The day came he got his transplant from Cali to AZ. He prayed for the moment giving the glory and victory to God. Thankful and blessed it finally happened. He got discouraged but never lost faith. He couldn't do this alone He gave it to God. God's speed God's will thankful to be out of the danger zone feeling saved and filled with grace. No more yellow eyes, but a smile on his face.  
He was working hard to keep distracted. Doing pad work now he had to work on his life style changes after the transplant. He set new goals and didn't feel restricted

Keeping contact not a memory
Reaching out can't get enough
So she won't forget me move on
Was scared to try didn't want to hurt
Not trying to hurt anyone
Instead of careless dreaming
Worried for others kept out
Things are going well not worries
Someone is dealing with health issues
Out of touch disconnected
Plugged in when times are bad
Working to better the situation
Other things neglected thrown off
Find balance be centered for once

Almost time to go home
All these ideas in my mind roam
Smiled because we shared a laugh
Keep focused trying to get the job done
Strive to stay alive hearts open to be revived
Some days are okay others overwhelming staying focused
Keep working till you get it right
It becomes natural makes sense

The people that hurt you
Made you stronger head up
Protect your heart stay truthful
All the betrayal ended it all
Kept you loyal to yourself
Tears wiped away healing
The emotionless cold stare
Recovery is a processes
Setting goals to achieve
Back to grind find a way

All he wanted was to be alone. Anything he did bothered people. He never talked about people he told them straight up. All the smack talking got personal jokes turned into insults. He stopped seeking and wanting their approval. More critics talking that never did anything worthy of his time. He lost friends some tried to stand in his glory take credit for his work. He was mad that friends became enemies becoming roadblock and detours to his progress. Family never seemed to understand but always talking.

He looked out the window
Wondered about his life
The betrayal he use to be fun
Too bad he's not the one
All the work not credit
Holding the place for someone else
Then quickly replaced by another
Failed friends formal lovers
Hard to trust moving on is a must
Heart crusted now protected
A screening process more selective
Missing everyone pursuing the dream
Over the one way love going forward
Making his own path rolling solo
His goals needed to be done alone
Others don't define him feeling excluded
Made a stand no going back
Didn't want to deny himself
Just to make happy it was sickening
Been rejected doesn't fit in
After adjustments left uncomfortable
Feeling right walking away

Dream chasing over the detour
Been trusting in the process
feeling lost going back but it's never the same
With or without you life goes on times change
Turn the page enjoy life act your age
No more suppressed rage vent the truth
Others don't understand so they see you as ruthless
Told the truth got nothing but hate it's never too late to make your dreams come true
They think you're crazy they have no clue
You respect their choices while they know your effort
Instead of hating they could be doing more of what they love.

Can't always say what I feel or think
My words twisted or feeling used against me
I've said the truth and got hated for my honesty
While others lie and are fake they get praised
It should be me but they chose someone else
Toughed it out, all the doubt can I do without
Did so much not doing anything now
Drives me crazy asking what I did wrong
Can't be this or can't do that worked hard
Overlooked deep down shook taken forgranted
Not my place made it a home and have grown
Deep breaths overwhelmed not sure if I want to do it anymore
Writing hearing voices things that need to be said
Some get hurt in respond eats me up dead inside
All I want is to be alive make it to the end of the day and survive

The couple had just broken up she invited him over. He knew it would get ugly and confusing. She wanted to make it work. While he struggled with the idea it didn't make sense. They were in a bad relationships unhealthy for one another. She wanted it to be only them no one else. He was social had friends enjoyed people. At that time he didn't know get it or grasp the concept.

Id open up but people get hurt I hold back but feels like I'm denying part of myself. I can't blame you for some reason I blame myself especially when I catch you at fault. If I make mistakes you are quick to hang me out to dry. Sad how people act how people claim to love but only unless they need something or need a favor. I see good in you but you are at your worse I'd expose you in the end the truth will catch up to you expose you for. Everyone wants to be right; no one makes time to understand.

Woke up feeling great no need to debate
Going strong don't like to be late
Pursuing greatness overcome weakness gain strength
Been doing good but only getting better
Been down for too long just want to get it right
Made peace with the wrong and learned
Made my mistakes right tired of being wrong
Learned to say NO and put myself first
Focused on myself for once and it feels right
Lots of growth and progression up late nights
Rage out of the cage filled with inner peace

Working with Thai pad is a work out of its own. Taking punches and kicks being able to adapt and adjusted. Doing drills coming up with combos
Coaching and being coached helps put things into perspective. Building confidence being able to take what's taught apply and learn from it.
Doing some extra work is a rewarding feeling pushing the body past its limits. A good sore not over working but going through the motions.

Saying sorry hoping to be forgiven
Made mistakes shouldn't be excluded for them
Some will never forgive stuck in that place
Same old face new behavior altered for the better
Can't live in the past trying to be in the moment
Tomorrow isn't promised treasure it while it lasts

Sad how people claim to hate you but keeping tabs. They tell you, you changed but that's part of life. Be the talked about not the one talking. So many hate you but some how they need a favor. When you're not doing favors they act like you've never done anything. Not trying to argue or fight. They never believed in you once you made it they cling into like if they made you great when all they did was hate riding your coat tail. All you want to do is succeed all they do is set you up to fail but deep down no quit or surrender. Keep doing what needs to be done because it's right. No need to pretend don't like me stay away dealing with your fakeness was of time and waste of the day. Please go away no need for you to stay. Better off with out don't need you or your doubt.

He minded his business so many problems while others Intrude their opinion. He felt provoked and taunted all he did was keep to himself. Some people have nothing going on so they bothered him in his space when all he wanted was to be left alone. He doesn't know these people but they act like he owes them something. They play loud music and throw liter in his area. He cleans it up while they continue to disrespect him he was better than them to lower himself just so they can feel some level of importance. He had a good day and they ruined it for him. He already takes on enough at work hard working determined to move up but stuck in transition. He didn't bother with anyone or need approval. He did what he could but felt so limited like the world was against him. He prayed gave it to god. He was a believer but felt challenged he sacrificed himself he was losing his grip on reality and who he was from who he seen himself becoming. He didn't like to argue because his mouth got him I trouble. His honesty was direct and straight to the point. They called him mean and blunt that's not who he was or wanted to be.

Always rooting for the underdog
They told them no over looked
Never given a chance took risks
Or they couldn't do it but been at it
Having more heart and caring more
Being disrespected trying harder
Never going to quit or surrender
Mocked more mouths to shut
Believing in himself no one cares
What he felt set up to fail
What he did wanting results
Win or learn ways to gain

Tired from work but wide awake so much burden filling the void making the most of everything. The heat is picking up. Hard to relax so much on the mind.
Trying to have a life not just be stuck in a crazy routine. The days blur together. Getting older dealing with the youth learn to be more into detail over fast actions slowing down quality over quantity. Feeling the flow going slow same old thing need to make the most of everything.
In the mirror facing your worse critic no need for friends or enemies on your case. Family giving you hate you knock yourself trying to be great. Millions of things done one mistake feeling like a failure. Give yourself credit no regret for trying. Stress turning your hair white and knots in the stomach.

He was the black sheep of the family. He wasn't bad but he wanted more; while the rest of his siblings settled. He had his own unique style and got criticized for it he was the oldest of 6. He didn't follow but he was a trailBlazer. They knocked him but he kept going forward. His family was not rich but family did judge them and looked down on them. He was hard working strived for more. He would not settle for less or lower himself to be accepted. He enjoyed giving his all and bringing out the best in others.
As he got older his mind gathered knowledge and wiser up. He is always battling comparing himself to who he was and who he has become. He asked questions and prepared for the task since its always an obstacle. Things come natural or learned quickly because he doesn't like relying on anyone. He never made excuses but dived in willing to conquer make it his own.
He was motivated to move up and strive to improve.

People made up their minds
No need to prover yourself
Over these made-up standards
These false ideals that are pointless
Gave my life to God following his rules
fueled by faith, no time for hate
stopped worrying about what was
Focused on what could be
working for opportunity taking risks
Love over lust survived broken trust

Life is a blessing with growth
Change your mindset new perspective
Leave old ideas behind open to new
Emotional bankrupt bad investments
Feelings burglarized by imposters
True colors shined through
Causing friendships to fade away
Failed relationship to shattered dreams
Hit rock bottom a steady foundation
Buried by family slanderous talk
Hurts the most still love them
Still living life to the fullest
Made up rules in their favor
Once you spoke up or disagreed
They tried to make others hate you
Trying excommunicate your existence

He showed emotions they called him a cry baby no one cared
He expressed his feelings they called him sensitive no one listened
When he showed no emotions he was called an ******* everyone noticed
He did well everyone quick to point out the mistake
He made a mistake and never heard the end of it
If he was happy negativity ruined his day
When he had a bad day everyone seemed to be in a good mood
He preferred to be alone stay distant
Reading for ideas so that he could write
Writing so that he could share his emotions and feelings so he could be heard
Called delusional for having an opinion
Judged for being different and having a heart
A hard worker one day the mule the next cut off
It gave him a voice since everyone gave his silence a false narrative

His dad told him he took a long time to say nothing. His own mother would insult others then say get over it. He was always supportive of them.
They didn't believe in him and only nice when they needed something. He always felt excluded for their love so he didn't bother anymore.
It was about

After the break up they had a casual ****** encounter. Things were weird. She accused him of being with someone else. He did not move on he needed time for himself. She would confess to having a fling with another guy. They were broken up and he could not get mad but she would blame him for her seeking attention else where. She was an adult responsible for her actions she knew what she was doing. They had broken up because he was not happy she was controlling jealous and insecure. He was opposite very casual and social trying to be accepted. He was not always liked by her. He couldn't go back and things will never be the same. They failed before why make that same mistake they already know the outcome why repeat this unhealthy pattern.

Going crazy over a girl
Had to move on get over it
Be strong putting yourself first
Not selfish learning to grow
Up late writing changing it up
Stayed sober cleaning up mentally
Music wanting to tell stories
Heart filled with beats and soul
Soul consuming scripture over hate

He was free from their death grip. They had joined say or control over his life. He was isolated and ignored. He expected nothing from them and gave them nothing to cling onto since they tried to bad mouth him slander his name.
The truth came out on them so they'll got quiet real quick. He didn't care what they did or said. He just wanted his name cleared
He was never a follower, or going to fall into place. Health conditions or not He was always going to be himself. They could never take that away from him He resisted rather than try to understand they tried to make him out to be the compilacated one.
It bugged him but knew they had a it coming back to them. If people believed the lies it was only a matter of time till the truth came. They tried to break his spirit and silence him. He was quiet while feeding his spirit with the word.
He was open to change and listen while their ignorance got the best of them. He made moves and wasn't apologizing for pursuing his goals and dreams.
They called him delusional, but they took and used the people they bad mouth. He was glad to be doing his own thing. All the talk no one felt bad for them and cared because of all the corruption they caused.

He was not good with others feelings so that made it hard for him to start over. Getting to know people is hard especially when everyone is sensitive or tries to twist his words. He had lost many friends because of a girl. He got along with everyone and was likeable. His friends had a crush but couldn't seal the deal. He accepted the ******* his friends behalf even though he could care less he just wanted his friend to be happy. They made him out to be the scapegoat because the girl they had interest in was not interested in them. He would be the middle man, his friend would hate him over a girl that he no longer associated with or he would befriend the girl losing his original over these failing events. He got tired of being blamed so he went away gave up his place because he didn't belong or like the pressure of others.
He never talked about anyone but everyone always had something to say about him when all he did was mind his business. He cared for his friends but they always got mad held a grudge. He got tired of caring the burdens of people who didn't care about him. He was only good for favors once that stopped everyone disappeared no where to be found. He made mistakes he not perfect nor did he claim to be. He learned if they didn't make him better or allow him to b happy and grow he didn't need them or care to associate with people who wanted him to give up part of himself to be liked or accepted.

He kept to himself so they assumed the worse.
He has manners and educated they assumed he was gay.
He was hard working didn't ask questions they called him a **** up.
Minded his business and never asked for their opinion but they always had one.
He told the truth while they bad mouth him and spread lies.
He turned away walked away stayed away because he knew their actions would comeback to them and he was not worried for the people who treated him bad, made him feel he didn't belong and didn't matter. Deep down he knew he was destine for greatness meant to be more. He got tired of failing putting others first since all they did was take credit never worked for it.

Things are not always what they appear
That loving couple caught in an argument
Friends bad mouthing another to others
A positive mind with personal struggle
Silent during the internal battle
Loud toxic people making problems
The intense silent use to fear it
Now relaxed and embrace it in
Grandma said no one's going to do it for you
It was the flame that got the fire started
Writing to clear the mind not stressing
On borrowed time losing patients
Waiting for a transplant
Hard working compared to before
Proving himself everyday
While others fail to try
Flirting with life and death
Now just trying to love
Have a heart do what's right
Tired of being closed off
Feeling isolated misunderstood