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release those words into the environment
without consideration
of the situation
of their implications
testing my patience

it was 'nice' to hear my voice for a couple seconds
still sending mixed signals
said it was just as gentle
so sentimental
driving me mental

i think you mean what you say
but it doesn't even matter
can't just bust in after
you left me shattered
pieces too scattered

to even bother picking myself up
had to start fresh
which was really just a mess
youre so ridiculously blessed
you don't know what it's like being second best
baby boy
wasn't his fault
one day the pain
had to stop
started with a fist
ended with a knot
leaving us behind
in his absence perpetually lost
something's gotta change
i can't keep doing this everyday
i know the things i want
but they don't reciprocate
always turned the other way
never mine to have or take
withheld from me
whether or not i behave
so that's why i huff
and kick an already shattered plate
frustration isn't the best option
but i'm tired of saying its all okay
zero patience
no remorse
what should i be sorry for

you made your choice
seemed so sure
didn't have to slam the door

on your way out
it's too charged now
bad taste in my mouth
don't try to turn around now

you spit in my face
made a disgrace
of every promise you made
i have no need to save
you from your fate
the architect of your pain
laughing as i walk away
by your leash
she pulled the noose
bad behavior
given any excuse
you almost let
that **** **** you
at the very least
it was some pretty good news
when i heard what happened
the eventual separation
it's expected with us kids
in this ****** up generation
a mixture of attachment issues
and gutting desperation
not much else i can say
that would be respectful if i say it
already confused all the time
and your confession isn't helping
i'm staring in the mirror
it's taking all my will to keep from melting
into the mold i despise
spilling over and ruining photos
developing to the role
your own quasimodo
hurting myself with scenarios
that would probably never happen
but in my mind anything is possible
and that's enough to **** my peace
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