Lost in my mind again,
Trying to find me.
Am I bi gay straight?
Why can’t I be free?
Lost in my gender like always.
Am I he/him she/her they/them?
  I see myself a guy but act like a girl but I feel neither.  
Why can’t I see me?
am I male, am I female, boy or girl?
The deeper I go.
I get further from finding out.
The more lost I get.
The harder it is to find me.
Will I know?

love is hard t find,
time is hard to control,
change is hard to handle,
life is hard to mature,
death is hard to watch,
but everyday we surpass,
everyday,
we find love,
everyday,
were on time(somewhere),
everyday,
change happens but we change with it,
everyday,
life  is made everywhere,
everyday,
death happens but they go to a better place,
everyday,
life gets hard but that's what it is,
don't forget 2020 is hard now but we are
the ones who can find the silver lining.
so look for it.

~gay poet Derick Arnold

The girl of my dreams
It’d be so hard to live without you
The one I want to spend my days with
It’d be so hard to not have you
The one that makes me smile
The one that lights up my day
The one that’s there when I need a shoulder to cry on
I could not live without your smile
I could not live without your laugh
I could not live without your beautiful eyes to get lost in
I can’t imagine not being with you
I couldn’t live without the warmth you give me
I couldn’t live with not seeing and being with you every single day
I couldn’t live without being able to call you mine
You are the one I could not live without
The hardest thing I could ever do,
is live without you

It’d be so hard to live without you
The girl of my dreams
The one I want to spend my days with
It’d be so hard to not have you
The one that makes me smile
The one that lights up my day
The one that’s there when I need a shoulder to cry on
You are the one I could not live without
The hardest thing I could ever do
is live without you