Hi my name is insomnia, there is an expression I like that says ¨ the city never sleeps ¨ guess what neither do i. Because my name is insomnia and I want to spend all my nights talking to you. My name is insomnia and i think we could stay up for one more night. My name is insomnia and I won't let you rest even when your body aches for sleep and you long for rest. Because I am insomnia I may not be good for you but you´ll always stay. Because I am insomnia and I will never let you close your eyes because you don't want to miss anything that happens at night. I am insomnia and you will never rest with me.
The roses have wilted, The violets are dead. The demons run circles, Round and round in my head. The parents are crying, Their kids keep on dying.
Because that's what modern society bred, And nothing was said.
The way you held me
The way you spoke
The way you smiled
The way you cared
The way we laughed
The softness of your touch
The way you made me feel whole
The ways you did things that I can never get back
In one moment, In the blink of an eye your whole world could end.
Its the truth dont take things for granted
Tall and Beautiful is she
Smart and Strong way stronger than me
Graceful like an angel sent from above
Gave me all her attention and love
The moment we met the second I saw her face
But no one can match you for turn of phrase
Dearest Kayley please never change
Take one pill in the morning accompanied by this one it will help
with the pain but beware of the numbing feeling it can fill you
it can take you away so are you sure you want this
or do you want to feel the pain.
You said I was stupid when you got mad at me
You said that I was ugly and I need to lose weight
You said I would never compare to the other girls
You said so many things, but the things you never said were
That you needed me or that you wanted me around
You never told me I was pretty or that you liked me
You never told me I was smart, you never wanted me
The words you would never say
Hidden in plain site I watch you take note of your every move.
I lurk waiting for the right time, for my moment to strike.
I know what makes you afraid and I know how to use it.
I am a monster hunting you and just know its your fault.
You have starved me of your love teased me with your beauty.
You should have listened to your mama when she said cover up.
Because now you are in my arms begging me to stop but I wont.
I AM THE MONSTER
A letter to my past self we could have done so much good.
We could have sat silently and smiled politely but no.
We turned to smoking *** in the bathroom with our ¨friends¨.
Like I said we could have done so much good but we didn't like that.
We liked the thrill from rebelling in some way no one would ever think of.
We also wanted to dye our hair and pierce our face while wanting to be alone.
We laid lazealy on the couch pretending to be as innocent as a baby.
We listened to heavy metal in the dark to feel less angry with ourselves.
We cried and lied to everyone around told them that we where fine.
A letter to my past self we can learn to get better and heal with everyday.
Big, Beautiful, & Bold
You said you loved me this way
Big, Loud, & Proud
You said you needed me
Now you want THIN
Thin is pretty you know
Thin, Quiet, & Polite
Thats the shape of us
You want thin not big
You want that to be the shape of us
I was broken since I can remember
A broken doll for the world to view
The way they stare at me for the cracks
The make a face and whisper about the ugliness
How they feel it is abnormal
That a broken doll is unnatural with the pretty ones
Kayley an angle hidden in plain sight
Kayley so bright and full of joy you can´t help but smile
Kayley bold and beautiful
Kayley you have a gift like no other
Kayley god will be so happy when she brings you home
Words from you make my heart beat one million miles an hour
Words from you make me smile
Words from you make it all seem worth it
Words from you make it all seem alright
Thank you for the words you gave to me
And thank you for never leaving me alone
You found me in the rain.
You held me in your arms.
Gave me warmth and love.
You said pretty lies that made me cry.
Held my hand then pushed me down.
You told me you loved me then you would leave.
Because you are the cold and the rain.
But I miss and will always stay.
Im kinda a fool for my cold whether boy. I hope you never find yours because they break you.
🖤 = Heartless
♐ = Sagittarius
⚰️ = Where I want to be
🧷 = Because I felt like it
🖤 = Stone cold
You lured me in with sweet lollipops but now Im be taken away.
You say that the money I will make can help people like you survive.
Im rented by the hour they drink and do drugs I get hurt a lot.
the man says I will never leave because I was full of greed.
so now im his and the lollipop dreams of a child will wither and die.
because of the bad men who want me to do these bad acts.
If I could I would take it all back.
to all the poor kids stolen away
I am A Brave Man
I wonder When This War Will End
I hear The Sounds Of Distant Gunshots
I see Men I Know Die
I want To Save Mine And Others Lifes
I am A Scared Soldier
I pretend To Have No Fears
I feel Terrified By The Outcomes That Could Happen
I touch The Dry Paper Of The Letter
I worry We Wont Make It Out
I cry While holding My Dying Comrade
I am A New Man
I understand Why We Go To War
I say I want What Is Best For The People
I dream Of The Soldiers We Killed
I try Not To Be Scared
I hope That I Survive
I am Just A Person
I held hands with death all those times
I wanted him to take me away
I tried to end my life with pills and blades
I was so ready for death but he never came
I am trying to get better
But the memory of him still stayed
I smile through the pain
I constantly doubt myself
I belittle myself
these cuts and scars
Are A Cry For Help
I need love
but I have no faith
I dont know how to trust people
When I cant trust myself
Still this is a cry for help
That word it hangs in the air like her cold lifeless body.
It rolls off your tongue like his eyes did when he overdosed.
The idea washes over you like the tears their families cry.
They say it was because they were sad.
But really they were in pain and they want it to stop.
Suicide it live in the darkest parts of us.
Dont say it was a mistake or foolish because it was the only way.
The only way they saw so the took the chance for it to all stop.
Suicide it take us and breaks our hearts.
For those who suffered or are suffering you are not alone.
Whats that on your arm?
**** its nothing sorry.
**** do you cut because if you do thats really bad.
No its nothing really.
I saw them that **** is bad promise me something.
Gavin I am fine please.
Noo if you do it again tell me but promise you wont.
Please Im worried
Promise but dont get too much hope
Because I have none
Elle était pleine de lumière
elle était pleine de vie
Mais ensuite elle a dû partir et mourir
Je suis désolé d'exister
Je suis désolé d'exister
আমি দুঃখিত আমি উপস্থিত আছি
Ek is jammer dat ek bestaan
Me vjen keq qe ekzistoj
أنا آسف لوجودي
Iավում եմ, որ գոյություն ունեմ
Mövcud olduğum üçün üzr istəyirəm
Sentitzen dut existitzea
Мне шкада, што я існую
Žao mi je što postojim
Съжалявам, че съществувам
Pasensya na nga naa ko
Dear Unknown loves, I hope this brings us joy.
I hope you have my eyes and your dads smile.
I hope you are happy that we have a kid.
I hope to greet you both with a smile.
I hope we can be together forever.
I hope we have love in our home.
I hope to be a good future wife and mom.
It started with him, he constantly said I was doing something wrong
So every time he did I would say ¨I´m sorry¨
I would say it so much it became a habit that was hard to shake
For every little thing I would say I´m sorry
even if there was nothing to be sorry for
It became the thing that was spoke the most
he had me feeling so small so sorry for him that thats all my voice knows
So when it comes time I will say my sorrys to all
¨Meet me at dawn so I can meet every part of you.¨
That note its words swirl wildly in my head.
We met at the river on that moonless night.
everything was a blur but one thing was clear you were full of hunger.
Lust and rage filled you as you pinned me to the ground.
Dark ****** things were said that was the seduction.
Alex hit me and took away my pride in the school locker rooms
Gavin is super kind but broke my heart
Jorden kissed me in the woods the told me I should just die
Leo called me beautiful but then broke me in half when he said it was a lie
There are more but I can't count all the boys who hurt me
I sit in the dark and cry
I pull the blade across my wrist slowly to feel the pain
That's the first time I tried
She was very mean to me so ******* mean
She believed I deserved to to die and so did I
Suicide at 3 A.M. but it failed and I was left with scars
The are barely visible now but they are still there
soft pink lips
deep blue eyes
Promised to stay awhile
held my hand
broke my heart
****** me up from the start
It was an average day but little did I know what was coming.
It was a slow day in my math class but then there you were.
Suddenly you lit up the room like fire lights up the night we all gazed.
Mesmerized by your very existence, then you walked over and sat down.
When the lesson resumed you handed me a slip of paper shocked I read it.
The words made my face burn I turned red that is how the seduction began.
The messages you send are full of lies
The messages you send are a waste of our time
You send things saying I'm pretty but when you're done I am nothing
The messages you send have broke my heart yet I stay
The messages you send have broke me time and time again
But my reply is always the same "please stay"
My new love meet me in the graveyard so I can finally see who you are, and who you will soon be.
I will carefully approach you so you dont feel you have to hide your face, meet me in the graveyard our secret hiding place.
You can be my undead lover and I will be your corpse bride so meet me in the graveyard, and I will be yours tonight.
You came home enraged slamming the door as you yelled my name.
I hid afraid but you found me, your ice cold fingers wrapped around me.
Clawing at my clothes forcing your mouth on mine I tried to push you away.
With that you explode my body goes numb as you ignore my pleads.
I cry silently as you force yourself on me you act as if im a new land.
Waiting to be discovered then you leave me a hollow shell of a girl I was.
Now im numb.
Hope is not what I want, But hope is what I have
He only talked to you because he likes the way you write
I know but I have hope, why do I have hope
**** your gonna get hurt, stop talking to him now
But he could maybe be my new friend, or not........
It has always been a weakness
it always will be
I hate it because it wont stop
I am weak so ******* weak
But I cant help but feel these feelings
I cant stop
I feel everything so vividly so deeply
For this I am weak
Shattered, Spread around, And sharp
Cracking under pressure it doesn't take much
Sparkling and beautiful
Yet sharp to the touch
is all I am
The boy named Luke was so precious and sweet I remember when you loved me.You held me close and smiled sweetly. I would have never thought you'd leave.But the day we said goodbye I got a present that fit in both my hands.
I looked you in the eyes as the wind blew your hair gold like sand.
You said i got this just for you, then i said my first i love you. You were 10 and I was nine. We stood in silence, which was fine.
You said I would always be your favorite girl that we'd meet again.
That nothing could keep us apart in this world.
So my sweet boy named Luke I really hope to see you soon.
this a poem about my first love I hope you like it.
He broke my heart over text
But I still love him
He shattered you into a million little parts
But you still asked him to stay
You ******* idiot why did you say that one word
You said wait and he did, you asked him to stay
He listened and stayed, but now all you feel is pain
Stupid girl you should have never said wait
you held my hand in the dark
then you tore me apart
leaving something new
leaving an opening for you
covered my mouth said not to scream
then I saw you weren't what you seemed to be
a monster hiding in the dark
broke my faith in humanity
now I never trust in the start
and to think you ever stole my heart
You are to fast and impatient
You expect him to like that
Your so stupid he will never like you
But I want him to like me he is kind
But then again we are worlds apart
Stupid stupid stupid girl
**** I always do this
The dreams I hold close to me are dreams wild and free.
They are dreams of me and you sitting on the sand talking slow as you hold my hand. The dreams when we are having fun we wear matching sunglasses and dance in the sun. The dreams of just you and me I need you most please set me free.
They hold you down pinned by your shoulders and waist
They say you have a nice and pretty face
They call you by your middle name
They slide their hand up your shirt and down your skirt
They belong to no one yet also everyone
They are monsters with a pretty face for a disguise
The boys in the schoolyard will tear you apart
The boys want to hold my hand only to break my heart.
They kiss me slow then leave me fast.
They say those 3 words then back out when they see the real me.
But Im a fool for the boys.
**** I think I love him
**** why did I promise
**** he looked so sad
**** I was careless so he saw
**** your so stupid he knows
******* never learn do you
**** I already broke the promise
**** go tell him use you words
Gavin Im sorry
No you didnt?
**** dont get hopeful he wont last
She was happy and always smiled
She helped people who need it most
how did we not see the signs
how did we miss the marks on her arms
How did we almost let her die
Suicide letters were found in her desk
We found her in the bathroom with bleeding wrists
She did not need to go to the hospital but what if we had found her to late
Suicide was all she wanted all she thought about
If only I had the will to live
My oldest friend
I have been there please reach out if you or a friend need help.
death is not the answer trust me.
I need space to breath
I need space to think
I need space to feel
I need you to be real
I need hope and I need love
I need to be the one you think of
I need strong and I need sweet
I need to be saved from me
I need help please
**** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****
I see you there and I panic I freak out I cry
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
I see you there and all the things from the past cross my mind
FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR
When you whisper in my ear and I know you want to grab me again
You wont get me back you wont get me alone in any room
I swore you wouldnt get me I swore you wouldnt get me
But now I am back here again
Mama said love is something good
But love is dark
Love is yelling at each other saying things that really hurt
Love is pushing him away so you can run
Love is him pushing you into a wall
Love is him getting mad because you didnt want a kiss
Love is him forcing you to do as he wants
Love is a war I wasnt ready for
Love is him cheating on you with your best friend
Love is being left alone to cry in the dark
Love is something good said Mama
Well love is *******
Your words the burn into me like fire burns into wood
Your hate is is planted in my memories like a seed in the ground
Your unholy ways are forced upon me like a wave on the sand
Your as faithful to making me feel like nothing as the people who go to church
You are as cold the arctic and as empty as my dreams
You are what I never wish to be