I use to hope that you'd keep that
photo of me tacked by your bedside
but you took it down, (vengefully)
I know this because you tore out the portraits
of me from your sketchbook the first time around

so I hope you find bobby pins still within your clothes
catch whiffs of my old perfume on the streets and feel your
spine cinch softly, I hope a single earring rolls forward in the
desk drawer, but I really cannot hope these things anymore.

so i hope the earring stays lodged in the crack, that all stray bobby
pins find their way back and that my perfume is never worn, never worn
never worn. I hope that my perfume is never worn
around
you.

I realize now how hard it is to see through the dark stains that have tainted the past.
How difficult it is to remember how lifted I felt,
how utterly blissful,
how completely cared for.
The delicate words flowing from your fingertips soothed my soul.
Your light filled every crack in my body.
You made my glow.
You made every daunting task,
every mountain I knew I had to climb,
seem as easy as lifting a finger.
With you, I could've changed the sky.

Now, there is dark red pouring over every memory until they've been
completely, and unrecognizably distorted.
Now, they match my own alteration.
I wish I could've kept them the same:
unsaturated, and untouched.

Before, you kept me safe, warm and loved.
Then, you changed. You judged, hurt and broke.
Now, you do nothing.

It’s all in a librarian’s day
surrounded by books
and serving people who pretend
to be book lovers
when they’ve just come in to escape
the heat or the winter cold

Books for Politicians?
Try the Fiction Section
Books on Houdini?
I’m afraid they’ve all disappeared
Books on Camouflage?
They’re in the Computers Section –
of course it makes sense, just think about it
Books on Suicide?* – They’re on the third floor
but be warned: once borrowed, they’re never returned
Just like books on amnesia are usually returned, if ever,
long past due date
Books on Making Money On The Stock Exchange?
We used them all for toilet paper
during the GFC Library Fund Cuts

Recommended titles in Romantic Fiction?
“I’ll Love You Forever” “Faithful All Days”
“My Life Is Yours – Absolutely”  “Love, Yes; ***, No”
“Only You Count” “Guide To A Happy Marriage”

The Classics Section? – That’s where we keep the books
which are most praised, but least read
and most people don’t go past the Contents page
and a decent percentage give up reading forever

Did you find the movie better than the book?
Well, you should never judge a book by its movie

Yeah, thieves never break into libraries
cos they know the judge will give them long sentences

*Oh, thank you for your concern -
I just slipped cos, after all, this is non-friction section

Intending to escape the world
Like a convict from a jailhouse
Only for the penny strippers and corner tippers,
Professionals of the arousal.

How soon we are to arrive,
That we would rather leave.
Grass of multi-colored pigments
Sway cemented in my mind.

Yet, I do not disagree.
Imagination take me.
Whispering dove of pity
Flies to a land that is free.

I step outside of myself
And see the stringed bow pull back,
Watch the arrow fly through foggy air,
And land on an island
In the middle of unnamed lake.

She calls to me then, crying for
Her lover has left again.
Timing tears with labor
As he sharpens his dull saber.

He watched her as tears streamed down her face,
Wondering if any of it was even worth it anymore.
The dog barked as he drew himself a glass of water,
Looking into the water as the sun reflected in its downward motion.

Outside of myself and out of my mind.
Leaving the world to its own self behind.
A hacking wish covered in spittle and blood,
Love for some is just not enough.

And now, when he sees his reflection, he sees her.
Cracks of his face remind him of chipped high-ball glasses.
Swollen eyes reel re-runs of wine stained teeth.
His shallow cheeks of late-night love making.

There was never meant to be perfection.
Life is really just one big accident.
Or a coincidence, a mistake, or a miracle.
There was never meant to be perfection, honest.

Do you think I would lie to you?