Maybe it makes sense to you
In your brain,
But it doesn't in mine.
Must have sounded like rain
In your thoughts.
But it's thunder and lies.
I want to believe that
When you wrote those words
You were Intending some sort of miracle
Some kind of beautiful world.
But ignorance and selfishness
Won't manifest love,
Kindness, greatness or gifts from above.
Because your heart is dark and your words mean nothing;
Just letters on a page,
A child's bear stuffing.

With the wind fighting back
and the words all against you.
Why are the tears left for only a few?
Why does it take six hours to make it,
but only one second to break...
Yet over and over again
I'll try.
Oh poor unfortunate you.
They probably will never see,
how broken you feel
despite what you do.

Today I dug up your old grave,
where you keep your old bones.
I wasn't looking for it,
something to break me.
But I found it.
Curiosity won and my heart lost.

Back in these sheets,
with my breath gone.
Back to just me,
it didn't take long.

     Once again they fell crazy,
     and I fell sick.

They only want skin in the game.
I only want peace in my brain.

Last night we were perfect,
But it was all in my head.
Because my eyes were shut and lost in bed.
There is two sides to every story,
even my own.
Mostly I feel lost,
Because you were my home.

Who engraved into you,
the idea that your hands were only made to work,
and love was something meant for someone else.
Who convinced you that your worth was found in the way you fixed what they broke.
Because you confess to me that your chest is comfortably numb
and you can take it...
But I don't want you to take any more.
Your strength is so beautiful,
with its gentleness
you keep me safe.
I want you to cry about the birds leaving and smile at her return.
Dance in the storm with me and tell me about your dreams.
Run further then you were aloud and yell at the clouds for hiding the sun.
My world would crash without those hands.
Some things can stay broken,
but not your wonderful soul.

The pieces in my chest are too crushed to be called a heart,
and glass tears stream down my cheeks for the last time.
Because tonight I can’t reassemble myself again,  
not like I’ve done so many times before.
I think I’ll just stay broken,
and feel the weight lower me down.
Close my eyes and rest,
for once to feel peaceful;
for once to feel nothing.

I still love you like the first day,
though my head hurts and my feet.
I still cry at night when your body leaves,
and my stomach aches for relief.
He didn’t take my heart when he touched my lips,
but you look at me like he did.
I’ve never stopped being only yours,
even when your wants seemed torn.
I’ve always been here, your keeper,
and love you more.
I still think about your body,
how it fits perfectly into everything,
and holds me together.
It’s not a matter of time,
or the unknown of life without you,
because I still remember the before.
How I didn’t know anyone who knew.
I was a secret, even to myself,
but you came and called me out.
I still think we dance better,
even when fall, at lest it’s together.
At lest we’re honest,
like when you cried in my chest
and promised me more.
I still think you’re the best,
I don’t know anyone who can play like you do.
I still get lost in your songs,
though they seem to be getting sadder.
Your eyes smile louder then yesterday.
But I won’t let myself believe I’m the reason,
only the cause of pain and pay.
I still can’t explain to you why,
even though it’s up in my own brain.

Breaking down into crumpled pieces.
Reaching for goals but falling for shame.
Either smiling for fun or masking the pain,
All too quickly you’r progress slips away.
The threats that are screaming in your mind,
Hide the joy that belongs there.
Every night is just a struggle to breathe.

When you say you miss the old me,
Don't you mean the younger me?

Because there is your problem;
You think the world revolves around you,
And time works a different way for you,
when if fact it doesn't.

Time only goes forward.
Therefore you can't miss something  
you never got to experience,
Such as the old me.

I had a moment;
a few weak minutes.
I thought about ending early.
Then I surely wouldn't lose.
How can I lose a game
that I never really finish.

You cover yourself with tattoos
to finally have something in your life that won't leave you.
You keep your house spotless
to make up for your filthy heart.
You read slowly
because the feeling of being passed over kills.
So you watch a lot of movies
to pretend for a new reality…
only to wake up 165 minutes later,
still alone,
still *****,
still overlooked.

Why must I constrict my poem to only ten words?

If
Problems
Follow
You
Everywhere,
I'd
Rather
Be
Miserable
In
California

I have this real bad pain,
in the back of my head that won't go away.
They lied when they said it gets easier.
It doesn't, just look at today.
There is this little voice that's constant,
asking why bother to stay.
I really consider quitting,
every time I have days like today.

My heart,
it screams for You.
Darling, it hurts way too much;
To live in this body,
when it begs for Your touch.

Love like a shower, never quite long enough.
You keep turning up the heat, because it’s getting too comfortable.
I could have soaked in your love, just a bit longer.
But you shut me down; never realize how I was so breakable.

Collapsible, like a fold up tent.
You used my walls to hide in,
but only until my warmth was spent.
I could have used some heat myself.
But I admit, I thought I was on top of the world.
Had me loving that view, from the pedestal on your shelf.

I’ll stay,
Wrapped up in your passion.
Cuddled in,
with your dreaming mind.
In love,
with your single heart.
You’re the one that keeps this smile real,
even when we’re far apart.

There is nothing I long for more,
Then to make you the happiest man on this earth.
And if it’s my eyes that bring you light,
Please take them for your own.

Because I’ll stay,
If you’re ready like I am.
Never looking back.
Because baby,
Forever would be too short.

Last night you poured out on the bed,
drained the lies from your mind, and cleared your head.
Cleansing tears, washing away fears,
promising to be the man I’ve deserved for years.
Methods of destruction, from your drawers to the trash.
Setting fire to the old, till all that remained was ash.
Starting new, this time for good;
putting me first, like you know you should,
loving yourself more then you previously could.  

Because this time,
you got it right.
This time,
you know it’s worth the fight.

And there is a light at the end of this road.
You have so much beauty, just ready to be showed.
Like a raincloud, just ready to explode, and I love it.

Every piece of you.

Can’t you see your brokenness is perfect to me?

I’ll love you through the fall,
withdrawal.
Help you break down each wall,
close call.
Until you are that man I know you can’t hide.
The greatest recovery of all; The man inside.

Your teeth lay in rows and your body rests on its toes.

Like a coffee shop you pay for what you get,
but i'm tired of paying for what I want to forget.

Looking back into your eyes,
I'd forgive all the lies.

It's something they never wanted to tell us in school,
that love consists of more then two sides.

People wearing masks of love but I can tell they're not fine.
There must be a underlying problem that continues to arise.

Even though it's dark I can still see those tears,
feel those wet cheeks and hear the cries of your fears.
****** screams, piercing my ears.

Your lips taste like cherry and you're ready to marry.
But ****, you're a burden just too heavy to carry.

So I open my door 24 times a day
hoping that the next hour would feel ok.
Hoping that your face would once appear...

My dear, I feel like you should just live here.
Away from those busy streets and into my bed,
where you can lay your head and banish these burdens.

See if this happpend I guess we could marry.
With no more burdens for me to carry..
Your fingers match mine, so isnt that a sign,
that you and me will be just fine?

You know I'm sick and not exactly prefect,
but to you that doesn't mean I'm deserted.
I hate you, but I love that you're true.
I love that I hate and love that it's you.

Bipolar reactions , but you knew this.
So just understand that not all my feelings are bliss,
they change from time to time.
But one thing stays,
you'll always be mine
and will kiss these faded eyes when they're blind.

Sorry if this was way too much.
*But I don't regret a word, it's your heart they're meant to touch.

If there ever was a day
where I could find the words to say
how you make me feel,
and prove each passion real,
that would be the day
to believe in what you pray
because it would be the day,
of the impossible.

If there ever came a time
where loving you was a crime,
and I couldn’t see your face
or hold you tight in the right place,
my next breath would never come,
because without you I’m not whole, I’m some;

Somewhat happy,
Somewhat satisfied.
Somewhat gone,
Somewhat dying.

If there ever came a moment, that we could hold forever,
a guarantee that no matter what, we’d be together,
you wouldn’t dare look away.
Because if that day was today,
I’d take advantage in every way.
Because it would be the day,
Of the impossible.

Felt almost happy today, forgetting this wreck.
Until you came back and kissed scars onto my neck.
Counted up my bruises, one for each day.
Knowing that some, won’t ever be going away.

I can’t trust my own body.
My mind craves food,
but my stomach throws it back at me.
Thirty seconds of uncontrolled rejection.
Fifty-two of unhealthy affection.
Staring in the mirror,
my mind hates what it sees.
And my eyes turn away because each one agrees.
Thinking one thing, then doing another.
Wanting a best friend, but needing a mother.
Pain isn’t the problem,
I can take quite a lot.
But my mind is against me,
injecting poison with every thought.

I don’t want you to be hurting,
your pain is not my prize.
But I can’t help thinking,
the sadness is beauty in your eyes.  
It’s not that I want you to feel lonely,
I wasn’t glad last night when you cried.
But watching you amazes me,
your tears are love that’s liquefied.

There isn't much keeping us away,
from each other I mean.
It's not like we are in prison,
there are no chains here.
So why are we not touching?
Why are you there and I'm still
not?
If tomorrow isn't guaranteed,
which I am told true,
I'd rather be walking, thinking, breathing
next to you.  
Let my love be the bridge that your feet trust.
Because there isn't much keeping us away.
All that's between us,
it's only air.

He asked her, "are you living your dream?"
She said, "if I am it's a nightmare."