Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
I don't obtain any of the qualities many girls my age appoint themselves to behold.
I refrain from what I'm told that I am expected to be.
I set my own expectations.
I come from where it's quiet at night, my parents spent my whole life ******* my head on tight so that I will never view my insight as crooked.
I've never been the girl that the cute boys liked, I've always been the sweet shy smiling type
In a world filled with wrongs, I'm just trying to do right
-while everyone around me is trying to be alike-
I'll fight to be different.
It comes naturally;
I've never fit in anywhere in my life
In a world full of darkness I'm just trying to be the light;
I just want to be me at my highest potential.
We all possess certain truths about ourselves,
Sort of like facts;
They encode the inevitable.
They're what makes us unique,
They're what makes us individuals.
I'll never sell my soul.
What's normal anyway?
and we lay pressed together,
he tries to teach me the dialect
of butterfly kisses,
and being so close,
we are no longer a landscape of two mountains and valleys moving,
but we are one,
and its so warm and comforting to feel his weight as he weighs on me,
and he still needs to be closer,
wrapping compact muscles,
around my stumps for legs,
and he is sticky fingers, that bestow solemn pinky promises,
half attempted secret whispers yelled across the room,

he is a sweet sunrise,
when all you have ever known is the blistering loneliness of night.
He is not afraid to talk and to share his thoughts,
and there are moments, snapshots of my failing infrastructure,
that lashes out at his incessant nature, me willing him to stop.

He discusses my beauty with strangers and mid thought tells me that I am so very beautiful,
and when he says it I believe it.

he falls asleep like one who is proud to tell anyone listening he is 3 and a half he had to add.

i wish he were mine,
mine to keep,
mine to trully love,
but I'm just make believing playing wifey to families,
with no need,

but right now its just
you and me
and the me I am with you,
and in this moment i hold your small 3 year old hands in my hand,
and its enough to be.
Homeless love.
Tattered looks
Paper back books
Stolen moments of peace in a jungle of brick and motar
Stone and deep seeded money
We are the pennies of the society dropped and looked over spared a glance we are blighten a blight on a commericial society of prada bags
But we wear the tattered rags of humanity best left overlooked
Blaming it on the overlooked
They see us as they overcooked but  they come to us in need place your order,but dont give to us
Pack mauls to your desire your disgust pale only to your addictive desire.. but i dont live here im just white girl passing thru.
you
brave and foolish soul
found me here
followed into
my impossible labyrinth
to battle with glowing torch
the demons

the fanged savages
those howling monsters
that take me into
their chest
bind me up in their fury
til my jaws rage
and claws strike
deep into your
earnest heart

and only after the damage has
run its burning course
will they drop me
the fire flickering away from my hollowed eyes
and i will see
your tears
and i will
press
my scarred
forehead
to your
quivering feet
and
with what is left of my agony
dragging itself from the ruins of
what is left of my soul
beg for a forgiveness
that you had
already
given
even before
i ceased
to be
myself.
The lost causes never remember
moonlight matters
it's tapping at your window
Sounds of baby peddles and November

The looming causes fail to comprehend
loneliness lingers
It's ebbing at your elbows
The best of beer bottles and dead ends

The loose causes refuse to acknowledge
Ignorance ignites
It's gnawing as it follows
Daily articles and unrefined polish

The least causes lose sight in the daybreak
blossoms bittering
It will fade as hearts hollow
Graveyard backyards and bone aches

The lone causes acquiesce to uncertainty
pages punctured
It is freeing as it swallows
Sunsets red and abrupt against afternoon purity

The loaned causes shatter against the bribery
Coins cascading
It is a vision as she wallows
Lipstick Luscious and cultivating calvary

The last causes shall never translate
Sculptures scalloped
it is swallowing in shallows
Hoarded hearts and breakup dates
I can picture you with her,
holding hands in a cold winter night.
Don’t you remember how you held me so tight
I can see us breaking walls,
trying to push through it all.
Don’t you remember our first last kiss,
it was back then in the fall.
I can forgive all the times,
you kept me up at night
waiting for you to miss your flight.
Could’ve sworn you were my white knight.
It’s called falling in love for a reason.
You take a leap of faith and jump, hoping you’ll end up on two feet.
After all, hoping just leaves you disappointed
Cause no, you don’t remember the laughs and memories we made on our way to the ground.
When you live everyday in the shadow of what you had with him and he doesn’t even remember the love lost.
 Nov 2013 Hayley Neininger
Jo
#5
 Nov 2013 Hayley Neininger
Jo
#5
I often fear
That I am an odd number.
My parity being
So that I cannot exist
In a pair
Without serving as a disruption
To all involved.  

I am a five
Drowning
In a sea of eights.  

Sometimes I wonder
Why I do not etch
Five fresh tallies
Into my soft, lonely skin.  
Watching the five new rivers
Run in red rivulets
Onto my bare, thirsty floor.  

Or use up five shiny, new rounds
To decorate my already cold body
With brand new holes –
Ones people don’t need
To understand to see –
Until it is lowered into
A sixth.  
My wax face
Made to look
As if I was put together
Rather than breaking
Into pieces
Scattering in five directions.  

And then I remember:

Pip One.
I promised,
While huddled in the dark –
Enveloped in the decorated arms
Of an angel
Forsaken by most –
To stick around.  

Pip Two.  
I promised
My brother,
Barely finished
Being a babe,
To teach him
All I knew.  

Pip Three.  
I promised
A boy like me,
Only brighter,
I wouldn’t leave him,
Like everyone else.  

Pip Four.  
I promised
A boy
I don’t even like
I wouldn’t
If he wouldn’t.  

Pip Five.  
I promised
Myself.  

Sometimes being
An odd number isn’t too bad.  
Sometimes.  
It gets better,
At least that’s what
Everyone seems to believe,
And maybe
I want to believe
It too.  

I am not a five
Drowning
In a sea of eights.







Rather I grow
Into pi,
Stretching past
The ****** sky,
And the eyes that try
To look beyond it.  

Just like everyone else.
Next page