some people are just plain *****-*** crazy
and i can't help feeling bad for them
but if i feel bad for too many people
all i do is feel bad all the time
and that just don't work
for this girl
some crazy people i have to let slide
i can't let them use me as a foothold
every time
footholds just get stepped on
and that just don't work
for this girl
that just don't
work

baby,
your hip bones aren't supposed to be sticking out
your ribs aren't supposed to either
they pump you full of pictures
of skeleton girls in cute bikinis
and weight loss tips
and though you always think "don't let it get to you, they're wrong"
it gets in your head.
because all the boys commenting on the photos say they'd totally ride her
long and hard
and all the comments on the girl who's slightly overweight
involves comparisons to cows
and you're so soaked in social media
that you can't help but see it
and all the girls commenting on how that's all they
want

but if all you want from life is to be "slightly sick"
to eat things and then puke them up
or not eat at all
you will never be satisfied
because you are feeding a hunger that does not go away
you lose the ability to judge how skinny
is too skinny
how pretty
is too pretty
after all, they are
the same
thing...

baby,
stop looking at those pictures.
stop reading those comments.
stop letting a pornographic generation of boys
tell you that ****** appeal is all you're worth.
start saying to yourself
i am not on the same level as a pornstar
because that is unrealistic
because **** is make believe
with plastic barbie dolls
to set the scene....
baby,
pretty isn't skinny
like pretty isn't fat
WE KNOW WHAT PRETTY REALLY IS

....we just ignore that fact.

flip-flop
flip-flop
flop-flip
goes them sandals that are too big
on ***** toes
ka-chunk
ka-chunk
ka-chunk
goes the scooter on the sidewalk cracks
flip-flopped toes
steering
tick
tick
tick
goes the library clock
on the red rug
in the quiet
click-clack
click-clack
click-clack
go the wooden puzzle pieces
in your small
elfin hands

i remember that you loved being read to
sitting on my lap, my arms around you
i pick out a stack of books
silly ones
you'll love
but you
sit on the other side of the rug
you won't
look at me.
i wait.
i ask.
i plead.
you won't
look at
me
my eyes want to turn into puddles
in front of the librarian
but i don't want you to know i'm sad
i ask you if you want to walk back
you say
yes.

ka-chunk
ka-chunk
ka-chunk
you look back at me
with your seven year old eyes
i almost say
i am sorry...
but this is not
our
fault.

you
stop
wait for me
to catch up
you hug my arm
put your face
in the crook of my elbow
look at me
say,
Red...
i want to read
a
story

we
went
back.

I am the awkward treble cleft resting against your crescendo heartbeat
All the while  thinking "I don't think Mozart could have ever written anything as beautiful as your breath"
And I bet when God made you, part of the angles choir found itself nestled in your vocal chords
Comfort
Like a down blanket you wrap me in the silk strands of your forearms
And all I want to know is how you got these scars
My guess is you fell to hard for a girl who was never your favorite song
And you had to nitpick the sour notes of her broken promises from your skin

You grow apples in the orchard
And tomatoes in the backyard
Both will be sown in the days to run
To ripen underneath the sun.

Come the season of the harvest
When your heart is at its earnest
You will pluck the morsels from the vine
And climb the tree 'til you swell your spine.

But winter, like the raging horses
Goes creeping like the darkest tempest
And let you do what needs to be done
To bring home just a single one.

It's quite funny but it's true
What these two things will do to you
They will just lie there side by side
To give you freedom to decide.

Which is which? You'll start asking
Here and there they'll go beguiling
Both are succulent, both are red
Both are fruits in the book you've read.

You will put one in the basket
And throw the other in a casket
To rush back home without a track
And leave the guilt behind your back.

An apple rolled on the table
It was the choice that you made able
It looked sweeter, that's what you think
It's bigger and would never shrink.

But as you took a bite it bled
The rancid juice it ever shed
And worms crawled out to sing your death
As you grappled your one last breath.

Alas! You lay in that coffin
While the soil crawled down and mud crept in
Seeds will drink your blood and sprout again
Red tomatoes you wish you would have taken.