I don't think about him or the fear he ignited in me but when I see his face
Why do I have to keep seeing your face?
Every feeling comes back
Fear
Self blame
Confusion
I feel so small
Your eyes and mouth were enough to push me into a dark abyss
I have the need to cover my skin
Like if it's my responsibility to make sure my body doesn't provoke you
I have the need to hide who I truly am
Like it's my responsibility to make sure my personality doesn't provoke you
I know it's not my fault but can you blame me?

wavy chestnut hair
brown dreamy eyes
take me by surprise every time
freckles
resembling tiny stars on his nose
intellectual
dreamy
I can't emphasize
cute
handsome
broad shoulders
strong arms
stripes

Chaos
something that I'm going through
constantly
But who isn't?

Intravedo nel mio passato
nel mio presente
vedo crecita
ci sono tre cose quelle mi fanno sorridere
il amore
la vita
e Gesu Cristo
il amore era qualcosa che non ** potuto riconoscere
Adesso lo e tutto per me
Qualcuno che conosco o qualcosa che faccio sempre lo attenziono con amore
la vita e qualcosa sacra e stupenda
Adesso vedo che la mia prospettiva mi ha cambiato
Finalmente ** Gesu Cristo
Prima di lui avevo molti problemi
Adesso ** i stessi probemli ma non sto sola
Adesso io sono forte e felice
Oggi sono la persona quella sono  perche lui

I'm so tired of you
You and your excuses

Every time I think about him
I see you and him
together
and I feel weak

I don't know a lot of things
But I do know Life is good
Believe me I know

I've been feeling empty
Careless
Nothing affects me
And I don't like it

I actually like liking you
I feel so good

I get goosebumps
whenever I dig deep into my soul
& I like it

I understand now
She smokes because she's tired

I saw you
but you weren't alone
I felt my fragile heart cringe
Because maybe I'm scare that it's going to stop beating for you
I don't know you
But somehow I feel like I do
I read your every movement
I hug you with my shadow
I crave to see a glance of you
Maybe she's right
Maybe I should stop
Waiting for you

I don't know
But I don't want it

I want to write poems on your skin with my mouth

I need to be in peace

Every time I see you
Your presence soothes my body
There's this pressure in my chest
As my heart pounds rapidly
My lungs lack oxygen
Sufficate
I have the urge to touch your soul
To know you
I want to be close to you
But I'm running out of time

I really miss you

My whole life I've been following a
Schedule
So why now?
Why does it bother me?

Maybe because I am no longer part of a
System
Maybe because I woke up
I realize I can be
Anyone
Anything
I desire
Especially who I was called to be

We are one

I can't bare to risk you
No
I want you close
Even maybe as strangers
Or as lovers who are too
Naive
But I need to know you're okay
Alive
I care so much
I want to hold you
Maybe later
Who knows?
But for right now
I just can't

You're such a babe

I was full of pride
Trying to be the best
The vessel
The good guy

But inside was this small human
So small
Layered up
So afraid
To be seen as weak

My shell began to be more than protection
It began to take control
Control of my emotions
You couldn't see me

I tried
I really did
Or did I ?

But it would just repel
My Ego was too strong
Rooted into my flesh
I needed to break
So I did

I'm not who I was
I know who I am
And I know what I'm not

I'm just tired
Tired of you not knowing me
Of not trying
I am human
You have to show me that you love me
I need to know that everything is okay
That you trust me
You make me feel so small
So tired

I look back
I'm not who I was
My mind has been modified
Transformed
I'm in love with the simple stuff
Life
Humanity
Earth
I'm hungry for compassion
My heart has been touched
I feel the need to spread the word
We are not alone
Peace spreads through my body
For the first time I feel
Alive
This time things will come to their place
I'm in control
I will let things flow
For the first time my soul feels awake
Yes
I am awake.

I just want to feel your heart beat
Pounding into my chest
Feel your warmth
Of your body
As I take hold of your soul

Why am I so cynical about love?
I know it's out there
But I just believe it's not for me
You know

I know love
The kind of love from your friends
But I linger for the type that makes you feel
All this emotions

I tend to run
Away
From feeling like I need someone
Someone who makes you feel complete

I just need time

I became emotional
Anxious
Thinking maybe it was you

As I waited for your response
I began to contemplate about your
Every move

Is life so weird
My affection for you
Is fading into the nothingness

Although I still do wish to be with you
But a in way that soothes my heart

Your existence
Brings chaos
The kind that brings peace
To my soul

It's something I can't contain
Trap
Unable to sensor my own thoughts
My heart beats fast
And fast
And fast
I **** so much
My mind tries to purge your existence
Unsuccessful
Soon I learn to accept you
It satisfies my soul
I'm fine

I was destined
To break free
Locked in by religion and temptation
Now I find myself running
With all my might
As if that was my purpose
Into the light

As my heart is being touch
My body suaves with the rest of the world  
And my soul feels tranquil
Just like my mind is unaware
I feel just as I should
Me

The voyage is set to begin
Behind the battle line
Lingering with aspiration
Billions of others
Just like me
The desire to achieve this feat
Trespass the Zona
Break it free  

An amorous key
Essential to transcribe
Me to thee

New page to fill
I know now you live
Within me
I came here to seek
And I found
A beginning
And it will take hold of my life
You were always there
In my heart
Even when I set you aside
I'm happy now
Even better
I'm saved

Disconnect
Something we should practice
Shut everything that attracts anything
But life
Off
A break from all these afflictions
That feed on our existence
Build a barrier from reality
All I want is to feel human
Alive

You are a toxic
A myth I created
Nothing but desire
Get out
Leave
My mind implores for more
But my soul knows
Shuns every possibility
It's just an illusion it says

Shatter me with your sense
Soothe my soul with your every touch  
You are my temple
For I will commend your existence
The only life there is
I am thy