I built a home for you, out of me,
when the bricks break
it is because I have been raided. The blue sky's
not even immune to cloudbursts
the humid air lifts
to resemble some form of heartbreak.
Call it
a mushroom cloud, I go off almost nuclear.

The truth loves me enough to reveal itself
the truth loves me
even when you do not.

I've decorated the staircase with it
and discovered rope-burn,
calluses like children wanting you to just watch
what they can do
watch a ceremony. What fathers create.  

I've padded its feet
with snow, the whole summer leaks with December
and my kneecaps are rotting wood.

Creaking
using garland as a noose
you know when I walk and when I sit, the truth
cannot stand for not knowing.

I've not let it lay down either,
this ****** affair. My
walls stay white and unheard of, untouched
yours are only
the cream of glue, I should have kept the doorway
shut and tied to you with a string.
Not even the truth can dissolve over a lie
(but I can, I can, I).

But
when God smells fear, he makes it happen
and God can be
a man, a woman, a lover.

I remember summers when
we'd play baseball till the sun went down
and it got dark...and
We'd go out riding bicycles
With baseball cards tucked in the spokes
riding down the gravel roads
stopping quick to make the biggest mark...
that was just so long ago
summer time was such a time
with memories and sounds and smells
of transistor radios playing loud
while we played down at Wilson's park
waiting for the moon

Wearing PF Flyers out
and running faster when they're new
sitting trading baseball cards
and getting sweaty running free
because that's what children do
We'd collect old bottles
just to trade them in get the newest
batman comic book that we would read
out in the fort we'd made from sheets
of plywood that we'd found out in the forest
that....was what a summer was...a time
to be a kid ....when skies were blue

I remember summertime
Noises, coming everywhere
Children running fun and free
Wind was whipping through their hair
Playing out till Dad got home
then going in to eat up quick
and head on back to the park to be
the first one on the diamond so
another game could start again
and finish when the sun went down
Man, that was summertime for me

chorus

Take me back to summer days
When life, it was delivered
School was out and we would be
swimming in the quarry or the river
Man...I miss those days
summer days.....summer days

I lost my mind the other day.
I found it hiding
in the corner of my closet.
I tried to pick it up
it told me
“No more
I’ve been picking up after you for far too long. Give me a break.
I need to empty out the unfinished sentences
and broken scenarios you’ve left graffitied on my inside.”
“I’ll be back when I’ve healed”

It returned yesterday
and told me
"You worry me into a panic
I can't leave every time
you fall asleep
to the sound of your heart
pounding so loud you can hear
nothing else.
People are beautiful
and you know this
because you are one.
You have every reason to
love this world
You have every chance to explore it.
Instead you choose to stay at home
and watch a new movie
Because its much easier to watch excitement
than it is to experience it.
How selfish of you.
You were given this chance
to live
and instead you simply choose
to exist.
Do not sell yourself short.
Do not be afraid of New.
Do not harbor Old.
Release what you know
and replace it with
more.
Give life its chance to prove
that it isn't as scary
as you think
it is.
I won't leave you again
but don't give me
a reason to."

I'm looking for an answer
To a question I'm not sure of
As I'm trying to remember
What I'm trying to forget

I've drunk away a liquor store
and smoked half of my brain away
trying to find the trigger to
the question I once had

I'm in a motel room in reno
counting ceiling tiles in the dark
I know how many holes there are
I listen to the dogs that bark ...inside my head

I just wish I had the answer
to the question I'm not sure of
As I lie here trying to remember
What it is I think I must forget

It could have been a woman
I don't know my mind won't let me in
I don't even know what city
that it happened in....I just drink away my day

There's an answer out there somewhere
to my long unanswered question and
I'm pretty sure I'll find it in a bottle
or something that I'm smoking along the way

But now I'm here in Reno
counting ceiling tiles and the holes
that fill them in and hide the stains
and hear the sounds of a dogs bark inside my head....

I'm sorry that you're hurting darling
I wish that I could ease your pain
But, it's not something that I can do
Until we meet again

I'm standing at attention
Watching, knowing what you feel
As you struggle in your mind
To figure out if this is real

I love you and I'll be with you
Although I am buried here
There's other soldiers with me
They say there's nothing you should fear

Veterans from others wars
Who laid their life down on demand
Others, valiant women and men
Who followed country and command

As they fold my flag for you
You wipe away a tear
And smile up so bravely
There is nothing you should fear

I'm standing at attention
Watching silent with no sound
As the guns go off is sequence
And I'm lowered in the ground

I love you and I'll be with you
Although I am buried here
There's other soldiers with me
They say there's nothing you should fear

Veterans from others wars
Who laid their life down on demand
Others, valiant women and men
Who followed country and command

Remember what we always had
A bond that only death could break
As strong as any hurricane
That only love could make

I am standing at attention
Here, with veterans who went before
I know that we will meet again
I'll be waiting at the door


I love you and I'll be with you
Although I am buried here
There's other soldiers with me
They say there's nothing you should fear

Veterans from others wars
Who laid their life down on demand
Others, valiant women and men
Who followed country and command

Now be my strong brave soldier
Take a breath and count to ten
For I'll always be here with you
Until we meet again