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Stop trying to remember his scent, he smelled like summer and reminds you of the time he made you laugh so hard, you snorted out milk on that dead, hazy day.

2. Don't waste your day trying to decipher what colour his eyes were, it'll only remind you of the galaxies and constellations that you once saw in his eyes

3. Stop trying to retrace the shape of his mouth in the middle of the night, you'll choke on your tongue trying to taste the mint he devoured seconds before pulling you in for a kiss

4. Stop reliving the times you clasped hands together, the glass plate will fall off your trembling hands.

5. Burn this list, admit that the galaxies and constellations shining in his eyes were wilted, the one in yours are bursting with fire. Remember on the dead, hazy day his laugh sounded like nails running down a chalkboard. Remember when you kissed, the weeds growing from his mouth entangled the roses blooming in yours.

Realize that one day, another boy is going to come and plant daisies where he left behind thorns.
I
still hear
voices
but now
we all get along.
The sermon at church this morning was called "I am Jesus, the Good Shepherd" and it got me thinking. In this world of 7 billion people and drugs and alcohol and guns, how am I supposed to find God?
That was a rhetorical question, by the way.
Because I think I've already found him.
With God, you're supposed to feel safe. And pure. And loved. You're supposed to find true happiness and not go astray. You're supposed to be a good little sheep and stay with the flock, where your shepherd is. Your shepherd will feed you and keep you warm and safe.
I feel safe in your arms. Even though I'm far from innocent, I feel pure. I feel loved. I'm happy with you. I haven't gone astray, I've stayed with you. You hold my hand through the valleys of darkness that I must walk through. You will feed me and keep me warm and safe on nights where I just can't sleep and the cold invades my bones and the hollow space between my ribs where my heart should be beating. You'd die for me.
That's how I know that I've found God in you. You're not perfect. You're deeply flawed and above it all, you're still just a teenage boy. But to be completely honest, I think God sent you here just for me. We're meant to love each other, among all the wars and drugs and guns and out of all the 7 billion people out there, we were meant to find each other.
I'm so glad we did.
You can find me dancing on the wind,
walking on graves,
creeping in the shadows.
You might find me tossing rocks at his window
with a pen in my hand
or between my teeth.
Sometimes you'll find me trying on dresses,
drawing finger mustaches,
laughing about nothing.
But you'll always find me in his heart.
My mother should be an author
She carves her soul into millions of pieces
Leaving it behind all of the family photos
When I see my mother
I see a woman
Who wants to hide her soul in a needle
Just so the screaming can stop in her mind,
These bottles are rattling in the living room
You see they have put shackles on her heart,
She can't love anymore
Without having ***** in her water bottle.

Where is she hiding her beer?
I feel like my mother is giving me a scavenger hunt
From the shards of glass that were left on the baseball fields
My mother used to take me to.

You know she always wasn't like this
She was strong minded and had a big heart
Tonight I will tell you the story of a woman
Who lost her soul to the Keystones to the Miller Lites
To the ****** Mary’s.
Let's rewind time
See ******* the soul in ten years

10- I look into my mother's eyes and I start to cry
Because I'm looking at a woman who I don't know anymore

9- I refused to bail her out of jail again
Because I'm afraid her kidney will fail if she drinks again

8- My mother staggered into the theater and disrupted the whole play,
My cast mates turned to me and asked, isn't that your mother?

7- I had to hold my mothers hand
Because she was throwing up the cocktail of drugs and alcohol

6- Daddy had to get mom out of jail she was drinking again

5- My mother throws the bottle across the room
And told me the reason why she drinks is because I'm Autistic

4- My mother overslept for my piano recital,
I didn't think it was a big deal
But I remember she spent the whole night crying
With a wine glass in her hand.

3- Mommy I didn't know your prescription came in a needle

2- Mommy the prescription say 2 pills a day
why are you taking 6?

1- My mother went to the doctor
Found out that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis
I don't know what that means,
But I know she will still be strong right?

0- She took me to a Dodger game for my birthday.
I remember Sammy Sosa hitting a home run that game
She told me that the only person that can **** your soul is yourself
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