i sit alone.
writing.
thinking.
feeling.
but can one feel alone?
or can one not?
if one cannot, then i am even more abnormal than I first thought i was.

he said that he liked me, maybe even loved me.
i said the same.
but then he let me be.
said that he couldn't be tamed.

i said that it didn't matter.
i told him i loved him now.
he said he saw a pattern.
and that he had to move on somehow.

but not with me.
the one who loved him.
he'd rather let me be.
then go out on a whim.

i hear the rushing water,
i feel the soft breeze blowing my tresses out behind me,
i see the water falling in slow motion,
every drop has light reflecting through it,
casting the world in a blanket of rainbows.

i hear the roar of the mighty waterfall,
i feel the spray as the water splashes on the jagged rocks,
i see the light cast a heavenly glow on my body,
and on the water in a pattern i cannot understand.

i hear the wind whistling in my ears,
i feel the cool water running over my bare feet,
i see birds dancing in the air like ice skaters on ice,
the clouds above are colored with the vibrant paintbrush of god, the strokes lighting up the world around me.

the waterfall is beautiful, stunning, majestic, breath-taking,
a wonder of god.

my life is in the sun, the moon, and the stars.
i'm in the dark for half, and light for the other.
i cannot change the unchangeable.
but i can express my life to you.
it's been rough.
down in the dumps.
But don't get depressed, I'm just dramatic sometimes.
I'm loved, but I still feel unloved.
I've had to change, myself, and my surroundings for other people.
But I have a life, a future.
A bright, bright future just waiting for me.
I can't wait for my life to begin.