Every once in a while I think about you.
Every once in a while, when I see your old toothbrush there, leaning against mine.
When your favorite candies stay put in the cupboard, and that pair of underwear you always liked lie still in the drawer.
Every once in a while, I think about you. I see your face in the bathtub bubbles and the shampoo soap suds.
I see you in the fresh bed sheets, in every crease, every pillow and every pattern that sprawl across it.
You reach out to me through the yellow wallpaper and grab me. Pulling me in and trapping me there with you.
I see you there, every once in a while, gazing, staring at me through the reflection in every passing window, door, mirror, puddle.
When I try to escape, you show up there regardless. You appear in my seemingly candy-coated dreams, revealing yourself to be a sour treat, though hardly enjoyable.
In my nightmares I cling to you, hoping that somehow, by some unrealistic stroke of luck, that you'll turn out to be the heroine.
But you are the villain.
I see you in everything, everywhere I go.
I can't get you out of my mind. I can't escape you. You are turning me into a pile of waste, steaming with an everlasting stench of misery and dread.
I will never be free of you. I will never be able to breathe again.
Just one last breathe of fresh air, I am begging you.
Sometimes I think of you, I say to myself.
As if it's only
Every once in a while.