We came to the wild beach
To picnic,
But the waves
Were breaking and rushing in,
The wind was gusty
And cold,
Was moaning a faint
Dirge.

In soft and plain
Footfalls,
Over the slide of sands
We made our way
Into the covering
Dunes.

The dull pressing sky,
The white gloved waves,
And sharp grasses,
The call of scything gulls,
All things were grey
And hovering
Dark and faded that day, but not as much
As the few, ordinary, words we spoke,
To each other
We cried,
To each other
When our tears dusted the sands,
We were saying
Goodbye.

I drink just to feel
What I had with you
I drink to bend like steel
I imagine you do too

I drink because I don’t remember
What actually occurred
That dark December
When shifty lies became blurred

When you touch me... I feel so lucky
When we touch it is almost too much
Too much love
Too much lust
It feels as if my veins are without blood

When we hug I imagine doves
In mid air
In mid *****

When we kiss all of the lights flicker
The pipes spit
The water drips

When we hold hands, I don't have plans
My entire To-Do list I seem to forget

When we take walks on the beach...
The earth don't even breathe
The water don't even wave
The sand don't even sink

When we make love
The headboard is like a tombstone
The mattress is like a cactus
And the only spring that's sprung is me

When we smile...
Every other personality that's near is expressionless
Is hopeless
Effortless
Motionless
Impotence

When you are around your friends...
Their skin is pale
Their voices can't yell
Their perfumes are stale

...
Let me take a jab at it
You ring my bell
All I can do is laugh at it
It is as if me and you are the only living things

You are my girl
And I think when we are together,
We stop the world

We stop the world
And as you walk in this door
The ink of my pen don't even want to pour
...

"We hardly speak any more."
I know it's true,
I hardly speak at all.

We used to often talk,
staying up late, letting
our words play their games.

She asked if I'd rather
live alone on an island --
in complete solitude --
or be trapped in an apartment,
only able to watch people walk by.

I said I'd rather watch the people walk by;
at least then  I could pretend that happy
people still existed.

Today it feels like I'm in that apartment,
watching people walk around me.
They don't seem happy.

I smile at them;
they never smile back.
I wonder if something's wrong with me.

I stopped talking when I started writing.
I already spelled everything out on paper,
and the words never crawl back into my mind.
If those words ever get back home,
I'll tell 'em all how I feel:

One:

You can't help anyone with words,
who needs something done.
A sentence about your love
means nothing when you're
twenty-seven hundred miles away.

Two:

Strangers are more alluring than
people you know closely;
that, my dear, is why I'm terrified
of getting any closer to you.
From a distance, you're so beautiful.

Three:

Sure, we spent a few weeks cuddled up
in your room; but your lifestyle is the reason
that I fled from Southern California.
I don't want things.

Four:

He's just going to end up killing you.
One instance of abuse should be enough
to send you packing. You crawled back for more.
I understand -- too well -- the lies that get you trapped.
I keep waiting for that phone call.

Five:

A woman should never be a reason
to abandon your old family;
although I see how her children
are your chance for redemption.

Six:

I wish we talked more often;
more than once every few months.
You're intelligent and articulate,
and the hour or two we spend
(not often enough)
fills me with hope for the world.

He poured the coffee
Into the cup
He put the milk
Into the cup of coffee
He put the sugar
Into the coffee with milk
With a small spoon
He churned
He drank the coffee
And he put down the cup
Without any word to me
He emptied the coffee with milk
And he put down the cup
Without any word to me
He lighted
One cigarette
He made circles
With the smoke
He shook off the ash
Into the ashtray
Without any word to me
Without any look at me
He got up
He put on
A hat on his head
He put on
A raincoat
Because it was raining
And he left
Into the rain
Without any word to me
Without any look at me
And I buried
My face in my hands
And I cried

Someone out there is waiting
To give you a hug.
Show you that there is more
Than just pleasure and pain.
If it didn't work in the beginning
there is a chance to go on.
Build memories on concrete
Instead of on air.
You don't have to believe
in promises made with broken string.
You can't play on a stage
After the curtains come down. But there will be another show
a chance to do things right.
someone cares that you weep
Late at night as you lie in bed.
Fighting against the will
To give up everything you need
Trying to be strong
you can't afford to let go
Of hope that it will be okay.
One day you will find someone
that lets you grow into you.