I have an idea for a film:

A kid, maybe about my age,
is perpetually uncomfortable
with his own existence.
he resolves to
**** himself.

he tries what he assumes
will be the quickest,
most dramatic
and least painful
way.
he takes a toaster
and runs a bath.

the power cord doesn't reach.
he looks for an extension cord.
he cannot find one.

he tries to drown himself
instead.
but his lungs just
won't give.

he tries rat poison.
he only gets so far
before he's throwing up
his guts.
no good either.


maybe he gets so
drastic as to buy
a gun.
but the gun is
a dud:
the firing pin is
busted.


he goes through
several more of these exercises
to no avail.
finally,
despairingly,
he gives up.
upon doing this
the boy becomes
enlightened.
either that or he dies
of cancer.
I haven't made up my mind
on how it should
end yet.

we have spoken of the things that we avoid
and argued about the void
which we call heaven
all the things that we do not understand
so I stand naked before you
guitar in hand playing to you
but woman one day
you will say
i don t love you anymore
and of that i am sure
for you can not be me
nor i you
so into a void we will stand
my guitar in hand.

sunlit lamp shade--
cat naps carry on while
politicians roar

what the f........duck
what is the box
and how would that make me feel
my box is within
so where
do i begin
I am me
as you are there
and how do you
make me feel
maybe you do not
but
that still does not
make you see
me cry
this is just me
how about you?

bark rubs
on skin in quiet wood--
mind grown still