Drink one
My eyes grow heavy
I sit in a fold out chair
In the corner of the living room

Drink two
I zone out
To the sound of the rest of my family getting riled up about who knows what
I want to join in
But then again
I don't

Drink three
Things start to get fuzzy
My words slur
I decide to join in after all

Drink four
It's probably a bad idea
To say whatever comes to mind
Laying on the bathroom floor

Drink five
This was supposed to be fun
Not a nightmare
My sister cries into my cousin's arms
As I laugh to myself

*Blackout

i swallowed the sun and
washed it down with a little inky night.
now wildflowers bloom in my heart
and light fills my mind. these
words are solar flares of a
fallen petal.

the price of it all--
welded lips of unspoken words.
now other people mishear
and believe i am speaking,
but it is only the wind
whistling through
my teeth.

now i find that,
being alone is silence,
but it is never quiet.

I smash my fist into her
Bleached teeth mouth
And feel a satisfying crack
As blood falls from her lips.
I can feel her perfectly manicured
Fingers dig into my long blond hair,
Trying to get a hold of me.
I push her against lockers
And I break her
Fake little face
And push out the words
She called me through my
Balled fists.
I hear my voice screaming
But I don't know what it's saying
All I know is she got her lesson,
And I'm happy to be suspended.

It's sad that as we grow up the brightness in our eyes dims,
Our faith and hope gradually slim.

The stars disappear, they aren't as bright,
It all becomes opaque, the caliginous night.

Our voices get softer, our fear louder,
We prefer to be lonesome, oh we're such downers.

The last of our emotions drip out, the color in our skin drains out,
You don't hear not a sound out of us, though trust me, we want to scream and shout.

Our hearts expand but get quieter,
Filled with sorrow- heavy yet at the same time lighter.

We become so very lost,
We yearn for happiness, though we all know it'll cost.

Can't help but feel scared, paranoid,
We'll do anything to help fill the void.

We feel an emptiness in us- start missing nothing,
We want to learn how to trust, give us something..

It's sad that as we grow up the brightness in our eyes dims,
Our faith and hope gradually slim.