I don’t understand destiny
And all this everything happens for a reason
It just seems like a bad excuse to accept how things are

So if you stumble upon a dog and it’s dying
Do you watch it die
And say It was meant to die
Or do you do whatever you can to save it
But then again we’re you destined to find the dog?!
Crap

I never walked away
Because I didn’t want you to see the knives in my back
I couldn’t understand your pain?
Maybe you just didn’t know mine

I thought I just saw god
But I was wrong
It was just headlights from a car
I was searching for something good
That’s when he sent me an angel
And it’s angle
Fix the loneliness in my heart
For a moment it worked
I submitted to love
Entirely
Foolishly
Once my loneliness was gone
My angel
Sent from heaven
Turned into a demon
An agent from hell
And its goal
Was to leave me depleted
It snatched away the love
Leaving my soul
Empty
Not broken
Not in pain
Not full of rage
No it’s goal was for me not to feel anything
I felt the heat from love
Only for a moment
But now
I’m cold

Everyones scared of death
Because they don’t want life to end
But I welcome it
With a smile on my face
Sometimes I ask why am I alive
Why am I here
Hoping for an early death like it’s some sort of a prize
Or a twisted blessing
What’s wrong with me
Can’t convince myself that I’m good anymore
But if anyone ask
Tell them I’m doing ok

Some people cut
But what I do to myself is much worse
My scars will never show
I’ve gone after my heart
And the things I do to it
You don’t want to know
I couldn’t even put it in words
Hurt me
I’m worthless
Trying to convince me otherwise
Is useless
I’m worthless
One day I woke up
And now I hurt less
I know it’s dangerous
But its also beautiful
I’m not the only one stressed
I’m not the only one who’s life is a mess
So pity me not
Just don’t stand in the way
If you were once a friend not anymore
I’ve chosen to walk away
No one deserves
To suffer along with me
Hurt me

I’m sorry poetry
But you can’t save me this time
I use to scribe to you
Until I lost track of time
And the bad feelings went away
As soon as I was done
I didn’t do it for fun
I wrote to you to save me from myself
But now
You no longer help
When I put the pen down
I don’t feel healed
Or cured
I always felt empty inside
But now this time it’s real
Hello Poetry, Goodbye

My faith in us
Unshakable
Like a Christian praying on his knees
Nothing can defeat us
As long as we believed
As long as I fight
I thought you’d never leave
I thought love conquers all
But now
All is lost
I don’t blame you
I blame me
I thought I could save you
Strip away your pain
I thought I could motivate you to fight
But that seed never sprouted in your brain
I thought I could pump your heart
But it’s hard to love behind a screen
I was foolish
You were 18 years to young
And all the wisdom I’ve gained at 24
Still want enough
I was selfish and stubborn
To think I myself was enough
I’m sorry I could help you
I’m sorry I failed
Your pain has you shackled
I’m to weak to carry your chains
I’ll always love you
I’m sorry I wasn’t the cure to your pain