My faith in us
Unshakable
Like a Christian praying on his knees
Nothing can defeat us
As long as we believed
As long as I fight
I thought you’d never leave
I thought love conquers all
But now
All is lost
I don’t blame you
I blame me
I thought I could save you
Strip away your pain
I thought I could motivate you to fight
But that seed never sprouted in your brain
I thought I could pump your heart
But it’s hard to love behind a screen
I was foolish
You were 18 years to young
And all the wisdom I’ve gained at 24
Still want enough
I was selfish and stubborn
To think I myself was enough
I’m sorry I could help you
I’m sorry I failed
Your pain has you shackled
I’m to weak to carry your chains
I’ll always love you
I’m sorry I wasn’t the cure to your pain

When did I become so numb
You could shoot me with a loaded gun
I wouldn’t even flinch
Stab me with the sharpest knife you could find
And I wouldn’t even yell as I bleed
You could punch me in my gut
I wouldn’t fall to my knees
Gasping desperately trying to breathe
You could do whatever you want to me
And I wouldn’t feel a thing
Because inside I’ve become paralyzed

I can see it now
I’m forcing myself to be there
When all you wanted to do was be alone and sink
But I pulled you out the lake anyway
And now I’m the one who’s going to drown

I’ve never felt so alive
But trying to save you from yourself
Will eventually be the death of me

I don’t want you to leave
But forcing someone to stay
Was never my way
So if you must leave
Don’t be afraid to go
It’ll hurt
Inside I might cry
My heart my ache
But I won’t stop you

I once read

You shouldn’t fight to stay with someone
Who does nothing to keep you
Maybe this is true ?

The last time I saw your face
It was naked
Now you bare a beard
It’s weird to see
How much you’ve aged
All your black hairs, outnumbered by the grays
The skin on you face seems to sag
Even your gold tooth looks beige
But what you fail to notice
Is the rage in my eyes that’s hidden behind the black shades
I don’t hate you
But the resentment in my heart
Makes me want to serve you with a right hook
And I wouldn’t be satisfied
Until I felt the snap of your bones
And crack of your teeth
The adrenaline blazing through my veins
Would convince me
The throbbing in my knuckles isn’t real
But as much as I want to inflict pain on you  
I can’t
Because today is my baby sis graduation
Which is the only reason
We’re standing here face to face