Hey you,

I hope you’re not sick of hearing from me.
I’ve been writing letters to you in my sleep.
It seems your last reply got lost in the mail.
Or I probably just forgot the return address.                                                  
Again.­

It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?
I’m not quite sure anymore.
I’ve never seemed to be able to keep track.
I think I’ve been stuck in this sort of -
loop.

Have you ever felt like that?
Spinning over, and over, and over,
and over.
A record on repeat.

Anyways, I miss you.
I’ve been trying to call, but it’s kind of funny –
it never even goes to voicemail.
It just keeps on ringing.
Ring. Ring. Ring.

I guess your inbox is full.
All those missed messages from me.
You’re probably just busy.
Again.

I should be busy too –
But of course, I’m not.
Again.

I guess I’ll go and write more letters in my sleep.
Wait for the lost replies –
Ignore the tears in my eyes.
Keep playing that record on repeat.

I know you’ll be home eventually.

Love you always.
Sincerely, me.

i wonder what i would’ve been like
if i learned to love myself
instead of being taught to break down every little atom and put it on display
just to be torn apart

you’re smarter than me.
stronger than me.
and a bit more scared than me.

ignorance is bliss.
weakness is strength.
fear is excitement.

☼

i guess ive always had a thing for fire
standing too close -
letting the smoke suffocate me,
the smell latch onto me.
i know i might burn,
but it’s where i want to be -

ignited by all of this desire inside of me

I've always been a little selfish,
a little spineless,
a little reckless.

I'll use anything as an excuse.
An excuse for the lack of -


                                      l  o  n  g  i  n  g.


God, I wish I could change things.

Ripping off- each bandaid,
salting every wound.

God, I wish there was another option.

I am closing all the doors.
I am pouring gasoline.

God, I am so sorry.

I've always been -
a little mindless.
Always shown -
a little too much kindness.

I've just never felt so flightless,
I don't really feel like -
I should fight this.

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.　　. 　 ˚　.　. 　 ˚　.　　 . ✦


Exaggerating just to feel something.
Anything, anything -
everything.

I don't want to be just another crack in your ceiling - another unresolved feeling.
Let's just stay a little bit longer -

The smoke. The water. The light.
I'm slipping through every little bit of you.

Can I be your everything, everything,
anything?



˚　　˚　.　.　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　　
.　　. 　 ˚　.　. 　 ˚　.　　 . ✦