I make a being out of hope
To act for me; to apprehend.
Return to me the love I lost
And destroy the tragic end.

For without his breath again by mine;
And that hand that fit so well;
The soul that matched my very own;
That caused Life itself to swell;

There would be no need to carry on
Day after day to just get older
So I make a being out of hope
And dress him as a soldier.

A gaping chasm
Vacuuming in the air
It hurts.
My heart.

I was made for the summer moon
Barefoot walks with sea salt winds
Coffee at midnight; naps at noon
Acoustics with wayward friends
The smell of fresh cut grass in fall
The orange of a sun closed eye
The sound of a cardinals mating call
And the awe of a star filled sky

I made the mistake
Of assumption
Believed he was like me
Wanting truth
An appreciator of genuine
So I gave him what I myself
Wanted in return
I gave him all my past
Every regret
Every fear
Every pain
Every mistake
I didn't water them down
I didn't conceal them
I surrendered all the ugliness
I became vulnerable
Nakedly human
Just with the hope to be known; loved
In spite of that humanity
I gave him the authentic me
I am proud of that
It took a courage I had to dig deep for
It took character that I had always admired when I had seen it in others
In the end
He used all of that
To form an opinion of me
Not one of who I had become
But of who I used to be
He failed to recognize the value in transparency
What little truth I was shown of him
I accepted
His failings were as many as mine
And I was just glad to know them
I consider it my gain
To have been judged unrightly
To have been shamed unjustly
To have been betrayed
To have been fooled
It taught me a little more about myself
It taught me that
I do not want facades anymore
That life is not a costume party
And that those who wear masks
Are not my people
My people are harder to find
But well worth the seeking

There is liberty in giving up
Wrapping up in the sheets
Dissipating
Dying the souls death
Don't let anyone tell you different

You smile
Your pride pumps
You feed on my dying self
You killed me
Genius