.

You're pathetic, I'm sick of you;
Always criticizing me for the things I do.
You tell me to take a joke, even though you never can;
You're always trying to be the better man.
You don't care who gets upset, you just wanna be right,
Always looking to pick out a fight.
You don't care who's feelings are hurt, you just wanna look tough;
Why don't you just flat out tell me that I'm not good enough?
You always say you're joking when you bruise my ego,
But it's just like you're driving a deadly torpedo.
When I make a joke, you get all mad;
Don't you think you're being hypocritical, just a tad?
You act like you're so much better than everyone,
But when someone points out your flaws, you turn and run.
I don't know why you're so cocky and rude,
Or why you give me such a terrible attitude.
I point out one thing, and it was a mistake,
Now you leave a terrible path in your wake.
Saying that I act like a queen, that I act superior,
When really you're the one who makes people feel inferior.
You're the one who thinks he runs the show,
Will fight to the death to prove his points by hitting you blow after blow.
Maybe you should take a look around you,
Try to find out what everyone else already knew.
You and your little bunch of friends act like they know everything,
And really don't care what pain they bring.
Maybe you just need a reality check,
It could be just what you need to stop you from being a fatuous wreck.
Life isn't all about demeaning people and tearing them down,
It's not about hurting someone or making them frown.
Maybe take a bit of advice, you're not as perfect as you think you are;
Because your words, they can leave a fairly large scar.
Your cockiness is just too much these days,
So I'm done with you until you change your ways.
Hypocritical and ill-mannered, I'll never really know
How a person could allow themselves to sink so incredibly low.

You're conflicted,
So addicted,
Completely twisted,
Of these things you've been convicted.
Your kiss was intergalactic,
Beyond fantastic.
But your tongue was sarcastic,
And your heart made out of plastic.

Your touch is so magnetic,
Your energy beyond kinetic.
Too bad your attitude was pathetic,
And your conscience unapologetic.

Your eyes are so hypnotic,
Your composure exotic.
But I was idiotic,
And a tad bit psychotic.

Your blood is radioactive,
But to me you're so attractive.
Our personalities are reactive,
Making my heartbeats hyperactive.

You're personalities are so conflicting,
And I'm tired of predicting.
So now I am restricting,
Your mind I am done depicting.

You were everything,
And so much more.
You were the pills that I take,
To heal my heart from the ache.
You were the hand that I held,
When I got scared.
You were the lightbulb in my head,
When I thought I was dead.
You were the air that my lungs held,
When I felt I couldn't breathe.
You were the pulse in my wrist,
Everytime we kissed.
You were the source of my sanity,
When I thought I was losing it all.
You were the thoughts in my head,
That left my lying awake in my bed.
You were my safety net,
The one I ran to when everything went bad.
You were the replacement to the blade on my skin,
Preventing me from continuing that ugly sin.
You were the happiness and joy I never found,
And I felt it everytime you were around.
You were my one and only,
Who would've thought you'd leave me lonely?
You were the warmth that filled my face,
Now it's cold, gone without a trace.
You were the waves that covered my toes,
The one I ran to when I needed my worries to decompose.
You were the wind that blew my hair,
Life without you, an impossible dare.
You were everything I ever needed,
But that boy disappeared, turned rock hard and conceded.
I'm left with the broken pieces of a love once beautiful,
Realizing now, that I am so very easily removable.
You told me that you loved me, and promised me the world,
Amazing how those words all got completely twirled.
You were the one thing that kept me from going over the edge,
Now I see myself leaning more and more over that ledge.
You were the one that stayed up for hours listening to me rant and cry,
Making me feel beautiful, and you didn't even have to try.
An effortless love on your part,
I should've known you were going to break my heart.

The colder weather is approaching,
Funny how that indicates the withering of our love.
In summer, we blossomed, so happy;
In winter, we die under the cold and bitter winds.
Back in May, you celebrated my birthday with me,
We partied it up 'til dawn, but really . . .
We just watched Disney movies together,
But I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
In June, you held my hand and told me,
"We'll make it through."
In July, we kissed under the fireworks,
Held each other tight, and vowed to never let go.
In August, you told me that you loved me for the first time,
And for the first time, I said it back and meant it.
In September, senior year started, we didn't have much freetime-
We drifted apart, but stayed together.
In October, we reunited;
We played in leaf piles and watched the stars at night.
In November, we could feel the chill of the wind coming,
But we decided to savor what we could until it came.
December rolled around, you stayed with me 'til Christmas.
You came to my house and met my whole family.
We were happy, despite the bitter cold,
I thought that we might just make it through.
But then came January . . .
January was the worst.
Temperatures dipped into the negative range,
And so did our relationship.
You'd scream and yell at me,
I'd cower helplessly.
You told me you didn't love me,
And threw our love away.
With February approaching,
Valentine's Day will make me a bitter girl,
You promised you'd be my valentine,
But where are you now?
Are you holding hands with a new girl,
Who's eyes glint in the light better than mine?
Or are you laying in your bed,
Regretting what you did?
Regretting you left me, the one person who truly loved you?
I hug myself at night, assuring that I'm better off;
But I can't seem to convince myself,
I can't shake you off.
Even though I'm not over you,
When the spring comes back, I will not return to you.
If you can't stay with me through the bitterness,
You can't be with me during the beauty.

Do you know how it feels to hate yourself?
Every bit of your skin, laced with the burn of hatred.
A visit in the mirror, it makes you flinch
How can anyone love me, if I can't love myself?
Many potential lovers and friends,
Pushed away because of your own selfishness.
Some create scars on their skin,
Some force themselves to go without food.
Some are just a shell of themselves,
Pretending to be something they're not just to fit in.
Not comfortable in their skin,
Not comfortable anywhere.

Sometimes, you just want to hide under your blankets
And forget the world for a while.
My child, I feel your pain. I know your anger. Your angst. Your hate.
I am a servant to my own mind, to my own self-esteem.
I look in the mirror, and I see so many flaws.
Raccoon eyes, love handles, big hips, crazy hair.
We pick ourselves apart, until there is nothing left to love.
And because of this, we search for others to love us,
To fill the void that once was our own self-acceptance.
The saying is true, though.
To truly love another, you must first learn to love you.

Your insecurities will force you to push the one you love away
Until one day, they turn away and never come back.
What was once your happiness, is now your downfall
And you're even further gone than you were before.
But my dear, that is why I am writing to you.
Your raccoon eyes? While they are curable,
They're just a sign of the war with your mind.
Not getting enough sleep, working too hard,
You can do this. You can win.
Love handles?
It's only human to have some extra fat on your body.
Not everyone can be tight all over their body.
My struggle with body image has been a vicious one
But now I know, the one I love will love my body
No matter if it is round, or if it is flat.
Big hips? My dear it's genetic.
I used to hate mine, they made my thighs big.
Hips are bones, there is nothing you can do to fight it.
Hug yourself, and realize someday once you grow to accept it,
A guy will wrap his arms around them and cherish them just
as he cherishes you.
Crazy hair? Who doesn't have issues with that?
Throw it in a ponytail, in a braid.
Don't let those silly follicles define your mood.

Love yourself. You are worth it.
Every person in the world is beautiful.
Not everyone will be nice,
Not everyone will compliment you.
Some people thrive off of negative energy,
And will do anything to tear you down.
But my dear, there are many nice people out there as well
And as long as you look the other way to those who try to discourage you,
The nice people and their feedback will far outweigh the mean.

Beauty is in everyone,
Someday, this world will learn that.
But sometimes, you are all you have.
Be kind to yourself, and love yourself.
Look out for yourself first,
And someday, love will find you.
And when it happens, you will know how to love back.

Take it from me,
I've lost one too many from my insecurities,
And I promise, it will make you realize too late that your insecurities
and your battle with them,
Are nowhere near as important as the person you can potentially lose.

.