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 Jun 2014
Rebecca Durrett
The life of me may seem easy and yet...
It is not at all.
My life has more stress than I let on.
You have no idea.

When you see me with a big smile on my face,
You have no idea how hard it is
To keep up that kind of charade.
But no one seems to notice.

Everyone has their own issues.
I am living with years of stress and
Judgments. Years of lying and protecting.
Years of silent tears at night so as not to wake my family.

These years are pressing down on me.
The pain and judgment slowly catching up with me.
Every new stress is another grain of sand on the
Mountain that I already carry on my shoulders.

I am strong for a reason.
So I do not break down in the middle of class about
Something that happened five years ago.
So that I can carry on with a fake smile plastered to my face.

I am not the first to be depressed nor the last.
I am simply caught up in my own problems.
I know that I have it easy sometimes but it is hard to see that
Over the mountain of pain in my direct line of vision.

The pain can be useful.
I develop intriguing and sometimes beautiful poetry from it.
Most don't realize that that pain is real, just in another form.
The ones who see it are in a position like me.

The weight of the years on my shoulders have hardened me.
I do not care about things like I used to.
I am no longer innocent or childlike.
I am a human being with enough on her plate to choke the beautiful life
       out of several people.

I can't fix this.
I have tried and failed.
I must figure out how to live with my mountain.
But as the days, weeks, months, years go by, my mountain is growing.

I am slowly being suffocated and the biggest burden of all?
No one seems to realize it.
No one sees this mountain of pain slowly eating me alive.
People who can see it...can't do anything to help.

I am on a sinking ship and I don't know how to swim.
I know eventually it will take me under but right now
I am trying to keep my head afloat.
Day by day I sink a little lower.

To anyone that knows someone who is sinking...
For the love of god! Throw them a life jacket.
Help them in any way you can including calling them randomly
Just to check on them and listen for the lies when you know they aren't ok.

Everyone will eventually sink but one act of showing you care could
Allow them another few minutes of air.
 Jun 2014
Paula Lee
How did thou waste on one thy soul should scorn
One that hurt thee and mock'd the morn
Lay thy head against my breast,
There I'll lay thee down to rest
Rest from thy world- siren that lure thee to ill
Work with a strong heart and determined will
Bravely fling thy cold chain that hath bound thee
For some good, be it ever so slowly.

Be thou content, as I, to know not see
To feel thy spirit, I would take
Tunes aerial beauty for thy sake
Alas! float into thy soul, so I could see
How to become All melody to thee
Til musics' soul, walked by thy touch, to wing
and mingling with mine would soar and sing
How mine thoughts like singing birds flutter and fly
with a song for thine ear, and a gleam for thine eye.

Love compels me to thy heart against my will
To echo from thy voice, come to me still
Thou to sing loves lullaby to me
Warm heart in thy dwelling, beat kindly for me
So passionately wild this thirst in me
To be all beauty and all grace to thee
My faintest blush, at thoughts of thee a crime
I count in vain the slow dull steps of time,

Careful thee, Lest thy wound a soul so rare
My heart to thee, Please have a care
Smiles can surer wound or heal
than the stars, whose light they steal
In voiceless rapture on thy manly breast
Could thou be lull'd by sweet untroubled rest?
I only greive, because---because---I see
Thou find'st not All thy great demands of me.
Mine a heart that Love Too tenderly and truly
Will break at last, thou prized me unduly
Though missed the beauty, Rare and Dear
Alone thou are, Alone I am, but forever Near!!!
For You!
 Jun 2014
Joe Cole
Cast it off you temptress, cast off that lacy thong
******* must be made of cotton
thick and white and long
They must reach above the navel
Descend below the knee
The bra, oh yes the bra designed to assault mans eye
Yes it has a purpose but should not **** thoughts inspire
It should be thick and full of cup enough to give support
To hold the ******* in comfort but it
should not push them up
Just joking on my part but i actually saw this on a protest web site where this man condemmed everything **** and feminine
 Jun 2014
betterdays
Here I am,
picking tissue lint,
off my favourite linen pant's ( I hate it when you leave a tissue in the wash.)
thinking small thoughts.

My mind,
dawdling along,
as my hands pluck tissue.
A bit like a magpie hunting worms.
It is hypnotising, in it's own way.

My dip, into the shallow end, of realities swimming pool. Now, I know,
there are those out there,
who are drowning,
in the deep end
and those who,
swim laps endlesslly.
And I will tell you,
honestly.
I know well, both those states of mind.

Bu, for here and this moment.
Dipping in a toe, is just fine.
 Jun 2014
Sally A Bayan
Why does it turn its head from side to side?..........


Watching from the bay window, i knew that very moment,
it was obviously up to something, a mischief at most.
it was comfortably hunched under the cool shade
of the sweetsop tree; the fuschia bougainville,
its thorny  branches  added  to the  shade.
Glaring blue-gray eyes appeared to be
basking in the sunny weather, the
yellow and pink wildflowers, its
body, hiding from the rays of
the sun, hiding 'neath the
tall, swaying  branches
of the oxygen  plant,
with its soft stems
moving weirdly
like a see-saw,
the succulent
leaves, one
by  o n e
being cut
off its stem.
It seemed sure,
as it  hit  its  nose
a g a i n s t  the  whole
bunch over and over....the
leaves, one by one, fell  softly
on the ground. Now, i know why
it turned its head, from side to side...
how surprised was i, for it gathered  the
fallen leaves to where it hid  underneath  the
sweetsop tree......for there, the leaves occupied
some space, and then i saw it lay upon the coolness
of the gathered leaves, then leant its head beside an old
empty clay ***, cold, too, i suppose.....fell asleep in comfort.
I fought the urge to lift this clever,  self-reliant  creature, take it
to my lap and cuddle it, lest it scratch me with its furry paws, glare
at me, even growl at me....instead of rubbing its  body  near  my  legs
giving me sweet meows, soft purrs, so, i left it alone while cat-napping.



Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A.Bayan
Marian, another one for Lady Jane...please take a moment, lift yourself from your sorrow, read this poem, with Lady Jane  on your lap.
I hope it helps, Marian.
 Jun 2014
David Barr
It is an ancient tradition, and we cannot pull the cosmos apart.
Nightfall is upon us, and the spirits dance with sensual provocation.
Thank you for the scattering of seed, oh mistress of water, air, wind and fire.
Grant us inner insight and carry our prayers to the Goddess at each quarter of this explicit circle.
I am inspired by the elements.
But, please do not allow the gallows to prevail, because I am innocent.
Can we meet at dawn?
 Jun 2014
purple orchid
I wrote my way out of the dark pages of my life.
I know what it's like to see your life hanging by a thread;
scraping your skin with your fingernails to stop yourself from crying;
weaving scars on your skin to get some high out of life.

Smiling on the outside, but tearing up on the inside.
I've been there,
disguising last rites as declarations of love;
holding out for that one guy for some unjust reason.
I was once told I was beautiful on the inside,
I used to scoff at that thought.
I couldn't be beautiful,
my metaphorical skin was sewed and patched, ruined and defiled
and there was nothing beautiful about that.
It took me a while to see that beauty for myself.
I was once that one girl sitting in corner at midnight
contemplating suicide over family tiffs, unrequited love, loss, loneliness, and every other
stuff that I couldn't deal with.
I can't look at my left wrist
without feeling some sort of disgust because of the tallies of pain
I left behind.

I had this habit of saying 'I'm always good' whenever asked
but I got tired of seeing illusions as reality,
I was tired of escaping my own life. I was not okay and I needed help.

I wish somebody had told me
this sooner:

MELANCHOLY IS NOT TRENDY, DEPRESSION IS NOT COOL,
CUTTING IS NOT A FASHION STATEMENT
SADNESS IS NOT ATTRACTIVE

It's actually sad that we,
teenagers,
advertise sadness as if it's something to be proud of.  

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL
YOU DON'T NEED VALIDATION FROM PEOPLE
DON'T LET HIM TELL YOU HE LIKES YOU BETTER WHEN YOU'RE BROKEN.
NO, SCARS DO NOT MAKE YOU ATTRACTIVE
SOME SCARS AREN'T WORTH HAVING
CRAZY IS NOT ****
**** IS NOT ALWAYS ****** SHEDDING A FEW KILOS WON'T MAKE HIM LIKE YOU ANY MORE THAN HE DOES
UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS DON'T HEAL --words I wish I'd  heard sooner

You are not broken beyond repair

YOU ARE A PHOENIX,
A PHOENIX MUST BURN TO EMERGE.
I've read so many poems here about suicide, self harm, eating disorders and so many heartbreaking things (I admit, some of them my own) and it's just really sad. I'm not judging. Maybe I'm just growing up, I don't know. I'm just at a happy place in my life right now
 Jun 2014
SG Holter
She's here gathering more of her things.
Keeps asking if I want this and that, and I'm sick
With the flu under a blanket on the sofa

Watching my muse quit, from
Deep inside my sweater hood.
Droplets of fever on my forehead,
And she can't keep from touching my face
Every time she walks by.
I turn my mouth against her palm and
Close my eyes. Knees buckle. She
Whimpers.

Something dying that
Tries to not
Want to
Live.
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