I've regressed so tired
That even the blood in my veins
Can't find the strength
To bleed
It's all the wars I always fought
Battles lost
Like the love I found

I've devolved so quickly
My weapons became sticks and rocks
Prodding at a giant
Imagining I'm doing harm
When I hurt only myself
Only my love

And I live in caves
I'm afraid of fire
It won't be long
Until I'm in the trees again
Forgetting
What I once was

My sweet angel I fear with the stones I shall remain,
I am doomed to repeat this unhappy existence,
Where my memory lives on when the vines and the leaves are gone,
And I become inhuman, merely an energy

My love the warmth of your skin and the melody of your song,
Will haunt my being while I haunt the living,
These brick walls, this concrete jungle, this manufactured light
From where I come I shall return

And I may never ascend in this lifetime
I may never leave the next one

My summer seraph who guards the one who wears the crown,
Who smiles at the trumpet Gabriel plays as she makes her way back home,
And gates open, pearly and golden, and to those trapped in this cycle unknown,
I shall be caught in a never ending story when my ability to speak has gone

My sweet angel, soft voices, feather hair, and love,
I only want to hear what is better left unsaid,
How can I know that when I die, my body, my blood
I will not become a ghost, still with desire to touch you?

And my memories live on imprinted in stones, and cobble walkways, and iron-wrought fences
When I wish nothing more than to be forgotten, and to forget
I may never ascend in this lifetime
I may never leave the next one

Please don't lose hope.

Have faith in yourself
As I have faith I'm you

Have faith in me

We manifest our dreams,
And I know we can both be happy!
You'll find someone

To be the one

And I know
The spirits speak
You're the one for me

In my own eyes
There is a star that shines
And nobody can say anything
To convince me otherwise
In my own eyes
There is nothing more beautiful
Nothing I have seen
Nothing from my dreams

An ancient statue
Of Aphrodite
Goddess of love
Make me believe

In my own words
I can describe
How beautiful
I really know you are
A rising sun
A full moon
A shining star
In my own eyes

I will always know the beauty
Of your big blue eyes
Even if the tears are forming
If you feel its storming
And bringing heavy rain
I see the joy behind the pain

A hand to hold
A friendly smile
A savior

You know that I care
That I'll always be there
Despite the distance
And any ocean in between

I will always know the beauty
Of your big blue eyes
And if they're crying
I'll be the one to dry your tears
If you feel its storming
I'll be the sun behind the clouds

I am next to you
And your eyes
They are not sad

And you will hear my song
And sing along
I'll destroy these walls
And together we build bridges

I'll always know the beauty
Of your big blue crying eyes
There is nothing more gorgeous to me
The words you speak
The way we believe
Nothing I'd rather be

Its okay if your not always strong
And its okay to cry
Just as long as those big blue crying eyes
Can smile once in a while

You would want the same for me
A hand to hold
A savior

Pick apart piece by piece
A sledgehammer in a China shop
That we call love
A billion brittle bits
I bend until I break
And can't be fixed

All is ash, all is fire
All is wallowed in the mire
City walls will tumble
A broken heart will stumble
A finish line
The race is done

And a new race to be run

And always attempt again
A child in a candy shop
That we call love
Start to see the sunlight
I die to be reborn
And love once more

All is earth freshly turned over
All are seeds I've planted
A mote I've swam across
A coin I couldn't toss
A starting gun
A race begun

Its time to run again

And all that I've destroyed
And buildings I've demolished
Its time to build again
A shining city

My favorite volcano
Untameable destructive force
Beautiful
And through the land
I feel the tremors
Eruption
I know it comes again
The same way as before
Devastation
Waiting in molten lava flows
And violent outburst of debris
Eructation
My favorite volcano
Cinder awaiting a spark
I'm ready to marry the fire

I fell asleep
Beneath a cherry blossom
Because the spring had made it bloom
And it reminded me of you

I fell asleep
Beneath a cherry blossom
Because your lost to me and gone foervever
But it was like sleeping next to you

Again

I fell asleep
Beneath the cherry blossom
Because I had no other choice
My heart told me to

I fell asleep
Beneath the cherry blossom
Because I had no place I should be
And it felt like home to me

These stars in my heart
This magical space debris
Has always been a part of me
From the beginning
These scars on my skin
Merely constellations
That hold a deeper meaning
If you examine them closely

And I know who you are
We share the same scars

This light in my eyes
Shines like a jewell
Like stars in the night
Until I see connections
These scars on my skin
Become a story told
These meanings
Only stars can hold

And I know who you are

A million years
A million miles of netherworld
A million tears
A million stars I'll never hold

And I still can't stop loving you

A million sunsets
A million waning moons
A million scars
A million self inflicted wounds

And I still can't stop loving you

I was building walls through the middle of the sahara using only cardboard, scotch tape, and bulldozers, when I got bored and decided my time was better spent looking up flowers on the internet that I would never see firsthand

I realized then how I wanted to be someone to follow so I bought an ant farm at Miller's Corner Store, and set them free but not without first covering my whole body in honey and letting it seep through my skin to sweeten my heart

I put the queen in my left shirt pocket

I was sitting in my basement thinking about my attic as I awaited the first bombs to drop in the next world war

I guess I'm pretty lucky to understand that metaphysically nothing really is unless we perceive it is so even death by chemical nerve agents can be a pleasurable experience that we come back for again and again

And that time I died before when the only metaphor would have to be trying to guide a wooden canoe across an active volcano

I can't wait to try that again

c                   s
    h           l        a
e          c                 m
          i


C     those were
               honest laughs    H
   E          honey
             d
               r
             i
               P                 M
            p
               I
I         n
             g
seratonoin
have a dose of dopamine
    let me
          touch your       C
A                 oxytocin
           it's all                     L
I want to do

S