This will never end - Hello Poetry

Apr 2013

Evynne

The world has become a little too mean for my liking
Everything has
Even the water in my shower
I stand there
And wait for the water to feel hot enough
It never does
Okay, I'll fight with you tonight
I turn the **** to the left
It's supposed to be hot
But I don't feel it
It's cold when it touches my body
Regardless of the steam escaping from over the top of the curtain
Alright, I'll turn it more to the left
**** ****
I let the water run for a little bit
Hitting my chest
Hoping to feel the heat
Nothing
This bothers me
I turn the **** all the way to the left and I give up
Why does the water have to be so stubborn?
And why can't the **** go more to the left?
It takes me a while to get over this
So I stand under the water
Blocking the mean, sadistic world out
Recklessly trying to find some peace of mind
Found it
And that's when the water got hot
Finally
I take a deep breath and let the oxygen-deprived air fill my lungs
Doesn't do much
But it feels good
This makes me close my eyes
I'm not here
I am on the street
Trying to use the sound of the water to block out the words I hear others saying
I don't like the words
They're not right
The others
They talk about so much
They judge so much
And here I am
Screaming and crying and feeling in my distinctive thoughts
Trying not to go crazy
I don't care what the color of his skin is
I don't care where she bought her clothes
I don't care about how much money they have
I don't care
I just want to look at them and admire them for being alive and being a person
You know
We could all use a little compassion and empathy in our lives
Wake up people
I took a shower
I can't be clean
But I can't get good and ***** either

Apr 2013

Evynne

Night, My Protector, My Counterpart

Your shadows cast down on the lonely spirits
Bringing with them intricate visions
And emitting longing desires
With searing memories that are cutting but so prepossessing
Residing between the clouds of the evening and the curtains of the dawn
You are both mysterious and majestic
With the moon as your crown
The stars as your wealth
And silence as your robe

You gaze with eyes
Open and wise
Into the universe above you
And see all of the depths of life
You listen with ears
Sharp and careful
To the sighs of desolation that flow ever so quietly
From the ever wakeful souls and the ever restless minds
You whisper with lips
Soft and sanguine
Into quiet rooms
Bearing peaceful slumber and secret dreams
With hands
Mystic and powerful
You close eyelids gently
As you guide hushed minds and aching hearts
To a world more kindly than our own

Lovers get lost in the folds of your dark and endless ensemble
And the lonely-hearted weep at your feet
You feel their unfading longing and despair
And lull them with your soft sounds and quiet presence
You are a friend of lovers
A consoler of the lonely

The minds of poets stir at your forthcoming
And hearts of prophetic stature awaken
As imagination and inspiration are both
Born and nourished under your guidance
You are a monarch to the poets
A vision to the prophets
A confidant to the thinkers
Ever so tragic
But ever so beautiful
You are home to the intellectuals and the visionaries
The writers and the artists

Over time you have revealed your secret purposes unto me
You have transformed my fear of the darkness into tireless trust
With your magic fingers you touched my mind
And my thoughts poured out in stardust
And flowed like a river beneath the moonlight
You kissed my spirit
Became my most trusty companion
You accompanied me in times of joy and in times of sorrow
You caressed my cheek and kissed my forehead
We grew closer and closer
Until we became one in and of the other
For within my dark self there are twinkling stars
That scatter passion throughout
And within my heart lies a struggling moon
In which doubt surfaces with the dawn
And comfort envelops me as the evening retreats
You awakened my soul and instilled peace deep within
I am covered with a veil of mystery
Given unto me from your own mysterious shroud

I, too, am a night
Quiet and profound
Yet fettered and unruly
Strong and exalting
Wise and amiable
Yet cryptic and capricious

For there is no real beginning to my darkness
And no real end to my depths

Apr 2013

Evynne

Body

I am trapped inside of my skin
I am a prisoner to the confines of my body
Never fully comfortable in my own skin
Always feeling so different
And separate
From everyone and everything else
My body has never felt right to me
I don't think it was ever mine
I am not a body
I am not even the person I see in the mirror
My body is essentially the only thing that confirms my human existence
But you see, I exist entirely inside of my head
All that I am, all that I am compiled of
Can be found within my mind, within my thoughts

My skin itches from the inside
I ache to leave my body
To become a formless apparition
Experience things from a new and different point of view
I exist entirely inside of my head
I am the only mind which exists
My body means nothing to me

I am a soul and an entity
I am not a body or skin

Apr 2013

Àŧùl

Cursed is how I live [HEADBANGER]

Warning: This is not a nursery rhyme for the fainthearted.

The promise lit by life,
Was actually lit by your lies.
Owwwww!
My forehead is mine I am made to realize,
Realization comes painfully when I bang the wall.
Sssssssssss!
****** I am hurting myself but that's all,
Never stupidly brave enough to actually finish it.
FREE ME!
I request that entity to let me live my life,
Cursed wasn't how I wanted to survive.
Ouch!!
The misgivings are just that bit too much,
As though a beehive fell on my head as much.
BANG-BANG-BANG!!!
I bang my head to the tune which I play,
And I am unable to bang it on a wall.
Peace is what I get finally
Cursed is how I live my life every day,
Talking to walls like concentrated prisoners.
I dare you to swap it with me!
Yes! Swap your life with me right now,
If you can't walk with me for the mile.
Whispers
The mile I dreamt with you,
The smile you promised,
The mile of my life.

Forget about it

I'm just joking about the swap,
I'm no Devil,
You can't live how I live because,
It's my life,
And I'm happy with as much I got,
I've to breath alone,
There must be some serious curse on me,
I accept that curse.
Loving people and then losing them is a ritual,
I must live alone like a hermit.
But you can live on talking only with the darker,
Idol-worshiping him only.
Enjoy with his pictorial representations & idols,
Only one darker idol can you find.
This is why I averse myself from idol-worshiping,
Because it destroys relations.
I lost not only my telephonic-best friend,
But also my real life best friends started avoiding me.
Not an idol-worshiper is a blasphemous term,
In her religion, in Hinduism.
It destroys relations if you start loving your idols,
And if you even start living like your idols.
You never did quite understand what Ishwar/Bhagwan/Rabb/God actually meant.

All the best with your Kanhaiya,
I wish you all the happiness,
And hope that He gives you what I couldn't,
Let your imagination work wonders for you.

Note that this poem was the last among my sad series and now I'll mostly post happy poems.
My HP Poem #196
© Atul Kaushal

Apr 2013

Robert Guerrero

The Reason For The Suicide Note

She simply stated the following
"I'm sorry if this causes pain to anyone.
I'm sorry for every tear you will shed,
But the one thing I can't be sorry for
Is taking my pain away
Even if the price was my life."

This is what the world has come to be
Girls getting criticized in school
For the number of guys she entrusted her heart to
The rumors of her being a girl who sold herself
Yet all she wanted was to be loved
Her father left her at age 6
Her mother abused her day in and day out
She had bruises she tried hiding with every form of blush, eyeliner, and lipstick
She cried tears of velvet red color just to sleep
She fell victim to Loves dangerous game several times
And nobody cared once to listen to her story

He simply wrote the following
"I freaking hate all of you.
I hope you join me in the pits of eternal flames
The very ones you condemned me to
Just for being...Me.
None of you can understand my reasons for this.
One simply being
The spine chilling, dead empty silence of a million cries for help
That everyone refused to listen too."

This kid was 17 years old
He had a child on the way
But he didn't even know
He spent every night
Trying to find Misses Right
In the silken *** stained sheets
Of his King sized bed
He was a straight A student
With several colleges looking at him
But that was what was seen
From the orbiting satellite's of his peers
Deep down to the belly of the beast
Was a child, no older than 3
Trying to wake his mother and father
Killed by a homicidal maniac in a tire screeching drive-by
And he faced that memory every time he closed his eyes
He watched as the pain got worse
He watched in his blood riddled dreams
As his parents took their last breath
As their last thought flashed in subtitle text
"Please let him be safe"

They weren't victims to the sin called ******
They were victims to a society
Based on destroying people
And eroding the walls they built for their happiness
We hear their screams
But do we ever care to listen
What if that was your little sister
Or your brother calling for help
Calling out to be saved from the currents of the Misery Ocean
Calling out from the cold still darkness of the basement
To keep that hair trigger 45 from unloading the single bullet they put in the chamber
Or keep the chair they placed under their feet
To get the height they needed to reach the noose under their feet
And during their whole funeral
You're going to beat yourself up
Asking yourself "Where was I?"
"How come I didn't hear their cries?"
Then when the pain becomes to unbearable
From not understanding how your god
Could be so cruel and take their life
When they meant the world to you
Could take their life away so quick

They apparently meant nothing to anybody
Because I'm the only one at their funeral
Their both being buried today
In this old decomposing cemetery
I'm the only one bothering to shed a tear
When I have no tears to shed
The reason for the suicide note
Is self-evident and right before your eye

I have no idea where this came from

Apr 2013

Robert Guerrero

In Response To Your Question

"Why do you love me?"
That was your question
Was it not
I love you because you are you
And I love how open minded you are
You smile at my stupidity
You are vibrant and intelligent
You have a quality not many others have
You are you
In response to your question
I shall reply simply
I love you because I have nothing to lose
I only have you to gain
And that is why my dear
I love you

Apr 2013

Ashleigh M Aycock

Death of a Geisha

She sloughs off her skin,
stepping out with heavy
feet to let her
coffin fall around her
piece by silk pale piece.

Raw and bleeding,
the water encases her in
a liquid embrace, as
calm as a mother's arms
as quiet as death at midnight.

Naked and alone
the water turning red with
truth and thoughts held
close, she washes away the
weighted thoughts of a future unknown.

What life she must lead,
to hide behind closed doors, locked
against the eyes of those
she so sweetly calls
her dearest friends.

But soon she is clean of filth
and doubt and steps out
into the gleaming lights of reality,
facing again the impeccable
glass of imperfection and truth.

She denies the facts and
slowly recovers, recollects
the pieces of a lie
formed through years
of trying to belong to others.

And slowly, like a geisha,
she paints on a face strange
and familiar, her practiced
hands trembling slightly,
the first crack in a porcelain mask.

It is then she stops,
caught on a stray thought
that has crept from the depths
of reddened water, the realization
that the geisha died long ago.

Apr 2013

Marian

Sorrow (Senryu)

My heart is broken
My heart is broken badly
And little tears fall.

*~Marian~

Apr 2013

Skye Applebome

Never mind

Suicide's too good for me.

Apr 2013

Mercy B

Daddy's Girl

In my life there existed a relentless feeling of anticipation that was buried behind a mound of lies

All along it was just me wishing that HE would have made an attempt, but instead he cowardly continued to hide.

To hear the first part of my story told by him and see if truth ever lied behind my daddy's eyes.

At least a chance to ask the questions that, for far to long, I have kept locked away deep inside.

  I know that my sharp tongued and quick wit was maternal but I wonder who's smile I wore?

A whole part of me is hidden   and ,without him, the answer to these riddles I shall not find.

  My long slender body and this smooth copper skin he gave to me, only in this I am able to be sure.

  I crave to feel the warmth of his loving embrace but I fear it will fail compared the picture I keep in my mind.

He never gave me a chance to be daddy's girl, a chance to fight  and see just what kind of life a life with us would be

  That chance is gone now, you left this life with no goodbyes, I won't get the chance to look into someone's eyes and finally see me.