Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
shia Oct 2016
You suddenly hear a screech from a door opening the room and you wipe the tears in panic. Grabbing the powder, you immediately make yourself look good and neat as you continue the mantra, “I’ll be okay.”

Stop saying that.

You’re not gonna be okay.

Yes, there are a hundred positive words that I can choose to say, but no. You will not be okay. I’m so tired of seeing others buy that fabricated smile you’re wearing. I’m so tired of seeing you hiding your feelings when people tease you, and all you do is just laugh yourself off. I’m so tired of seeing you humiliate yourself and make other people happy, yet in the inside you just push the bad thoughts away. I’m so tired of seeing you sacrifice something because you want to be fit in the society’s standards.

And I bet you’re tired, too.

You’re tired of having to hide your sadness because other people will be sad, too. You’re tired of going to school and out feeling like a ghost, transparent and feeling nothing. You’re tired of going home and receiving sermons from your parents even though you haven’t done anything. You’re tired of working so hard because people pressure you to do the best, they want you to exceed other people. You’re tired of being your best and you just want to be normal. You’re tired of having to go to sleep crying and wetting your soft pillow with your endless tears.

Honey, it’s okay to rest.

It’s okay to be sad for a while. It’s okay to have “off” moods and not caring about other people (not in a bad way!). It’s okay to hang out with your best friend once in a while, even when that book report is due the next day. It’s okay to go out alone and treat yourself some pizza or doughnuts. It’s okay to eat that last bag of chips in the pantry. It’s okay to turn on that night light and read a classic novel. It’s okay to shout in a mall or in the rooftop or in public places when you feel like you need to blow.

It’s okay to break down and cry. It’s okay to need someone whenever you feel weak.

For a moment, just stop being so considerate of others. You always care so much about others’ feelings that you didn’t have the time to take care of yourself. You love others so much that you didn’t realize every part of you was fading. You were so selfless that you became the lesser part of yourself. For once, start knowing what you want to do and what really makes you happy.

Please grab that handkerchief and cry all you want. Please lie down and cry. Cry. Cry. Cry.

And then, know your priorities and set your goals straight. Do not be what other want you to be. Be what you are and who you are. Get up and be confident. Start being happy all over again. Find your inspiration. And if you feel like giving up again,

remember that the winds brought you down and hurt you…

but you got up and conquered the storm.

You’re not gonna be okay. And that’s what I have experienced so far. But in time, you will heal. In time, you will be the best version of yourself. In time, you will no longer be afraid and scared and belittled of the storm. You will be ahead of it. Time will come, dear, when you will bloom a beautiful flower in this whole garden. Soon, you’re going to smile and be okay.
motivation, i have exams tomorrow huhu! To all the people who feel tired in body and mind, please do read!
shia Oct 2016
The beeping machine continued its loud beeping
Our heroine sat in the plain, cheap bed
Her eyes were dull yet she was silently weeping
“I don’t think you can,” the doctor had said.

She’s fed up of the crack walls and white, ripped-off paint
Escape from reality she needed
Pity from her visitors is what she does hate
“I’m still alive,” she silently pleaded.

The beeping machine continued its loud beeping
She pressed the big, red button behind her
A handsome young man entered her room, panicking
“You’re alive,” the nurse said in a holler.

She silently spoke, “Why, if I was rather dead,
Would it make things better for you and me?”
“That’s not what I meant, I take my words back,” he sighed.
“I almost died worrying, don’t you see?”

The beeping machine continued its loud beeping
The handsome nurse still sitting beside her
“My shift’s almost over, I’ll be leaving.”
“Thank you, my nurse, for making me feel better.”

And days and months had passed since they knew each other
Days and months had passed, they became close friends
When she silently screams in fear and cries and cowers
He’s there to hold her hand until it ends

The beeping machine continued its loud beeping
“Young man, my ears are tired of the silence.
Sing me a song I’d never get sick of hearing
A melody beautiful and timeless.”

She silently giggled as the kind nurse tries
“Let’s go and hold hands in this crumbling world
Time flies when we look into each other’s eyes
I’ll save you from being alone and hurt.”

The beeping machine continued its loud beeping
She silently asked, “Why did you choose to stay?
Aren’t you tired of me, I speak without speaking
The people who once loved me had now gone away.”

The nurse wiped away her tears and cupped her pale face
“People like you are always worth the wait
I’m so scared of the world losing you, so I stayed
In this world full of suns, I’ll be your shade.”

The beeping machine started rapidly beeping
They were moving her bed after the alarm
As the young man stared at the girl soundly sleeping
He can’t help but ask, “How is she so calm?”

While walking back and forth, he silently listened
“On top of her sickness is another sickness,
Her attacks are frequent, her brain’s badly damaged
At this point, she had already reached her limits.”

The beeping machine was still rapidly beeping
When the nurse opened the door to her room
“Young man, did I look pretty when I was sleeping?
Because I want to sleep forever soon.”
She silently said that while smiling at her nurse
The young man shook his head and held her hand
“You want forever?...**** it, I can’t find the words
But please don’t leave me, do you understand?”

The beeping machine was still rapidly beeping
She cupped the nurse’s face and kissed his forehead
“Young man, for years I have been badly suffering
And now is the time I want it to end.”

“Remember when you sang you’re scared of losing me
And you’ll save me from being alone and hurt?
Let’s hold hands and finally set each other free
I’ll let you fall out of love, but turn off my machine first.”

The nurse held her hand tight and brought his lips to hers
“I’ll let go of you and now I won’t be greedy
Love comes and goes but to myself I curse;
I fell in love, and will always be in love for an infinity.”

The beeping machine that used to beep so loud and clear
Now stopped and so did our heroine’s breathing
The deaf girl that moved her hands to talk silently
for years
Left her lover’s heart silently breaking.

w.c
hi, i did this eons ago i only had the courage to share it now...

— The End —