how does it feel
to be a thought

to jump across the synapses

fly like a great ape
tree to tree

network to network
bridge to bridge

and when it kills another thought

does it feel guilty
does it mourn

does it want to be remembered
does it remember being born

does it make choices
does it know

when it gets lost
where does it go

does it fade
or turn into code

what waits at the end of the road

to change its way
to change its shape

what does that take

what hope
what faith

maybe it knows
or maybe not

ah well

it was only a thought

do not love me for my face
love me for my ways
my grace

do not love me for my looks
love me for my art
my books

do not love me because I'm young
love me for what I've said and done

love me for something deep
love me
love me for something I can keep

it is strange when I look back
at all the things I chose to say

poems about quantum physics
poems about DNA

I am quite aware that I might
come across a little odd

thinking about thinking
looking at the sky
looking for God

it gives me shivers when I see
the pattern running through it all

staring out into the void
and reaching out behind my walls

strange encrypted souls
building our bridges into the unknown

strange to feel so understood
strange that I am not alone

a sound like rage
like metal rain
the sound of the dragon
breaking her chains

beneath her wings
the sky in flames
fire in her eyes
as she flies away

King Solomon was wise to know
sometimes there is no compromise
I look into your angry eyes
and I can see your fear

the fear of losing what you love
of being judged
as not enough

my better judgment says
give up
and walk away from here

I know that you are not
"the one"
I know this is not real

It isn't really about you
It's just the way I feel

I tell myself this time is different
this time you are right

But I am chasing the same shadow
through a different night

I never get used to the pain
the pain
the same **** pain

I know you will break the cycle
I know you will break the chain

And tomorrow I will run from you
But it will be the same

The same sorrow
The same pain

Same shadow
Another name

I wish I had
nothing to hide

I wish I had
nothing to prove

I am alone
behind my walls

I am afraid to love you

what happens if I let you in?
what happens if you see my soul?

vulnerable
not in control

LEAVE ME ALONE

I need my walls