Ciel Noir

Ciel Noir Oct 2023

Reach

I reach out to the ones I love
At least when I am brave enough
But sometimes I am too afraid
Afraid that they will turn away

In questions I reach out my hand
To what I want to understand
But that is more than I can ask
I reach for things I cannot grasp

I reach for what I hope to earn
I work and learn and in return
Reach for the stars
Find out they burn
Another lesson I can learn

And when I fall down from the stars
And when the tree was just too far
I summon all my strength to stand
And once again reach out my hand

Ciel Noir Oct 2023

Echo

subliminal reverberation
of some long-forgotten song
a melody that calls the soul
back to a place we once belonged

darker than night
stranger than time
deeper than tribe
older than words

inflecting language to reflect
an echo of what we have heard

Ciel Noir Oct 2023

Tomorrow

tomorrow will be different
tomorrow I will make the change
those are such easy words to say
tomorrow isn't a real day

Ciel Noir Oct 2023

Conditional

I judge myself
more harshly than
I would judge anybody else

I made an innocent mistake
so I must not deserve success

I try and try and still I fail
so I am just not good enough

it's hard to build relationships
so I am too broken to love

I try so hard to learn and grow
to do better
to do my best

if I were someone else
it would be easy to forgive myself

and I should love myself
even if I do not seem 'good enough'

to love no matter what
that is the most important kind of love

Ciel Noir Oct 2023

Again

hey     again
it's me     again
I did a stupid thing     again
I didn't stop to think     again
I fell and broke my wing     again

hey     again
today     again
I faced the sky and prayed     again
it's not that I believe     again
it's just that I'm afraid     again

hey     again
I'm sad     again
I don't want to pretend     again
so I reach out my hand     again
and get strength from my friends     again

hey     again
I'm fine    again
I think it's time to try     again
I think I'll be alright     again
I'm strong enough to fly    again

Ciel Noir Sep 2023

Read

vandalize my mind
with layer over layer of graffiti
I repeat it and repeat it
until no one else can read it

ciphers in my system
speaking in my sleep
ink in my blood

very little still remains
of the blank slate
that I once was

Ciel Noir Sep 2023

Samsara

flowers flying on the breeze

sunlight dancing through the trees

ripples moving through a stream

strange that this is all a dream

symmetry and synchrony

entropy and empathy

can't believe how real this seems

strange that this is all a dream