I understand "mad"
Obstinate amongst navel oranges
Coasting with the  waves

the sky above walgreens looks like water color
i hear "it's never..." outside my street screamed
the past four nights have been a blur of panic as the yuletide approaches

I look on this gradient sky,
in a city i lost three years ago

but i'm still here.

when your lips purse in your deep sleep
every inches twitch
i'm there
you make love love again
you make feel feel again
i wish i could buy you the world because I know you'd buy me one first
the sparkles, the shine, the glitter, the radiance
trees and train tracks
teeth and crooked smiles
with comfort food on our breath
seconded handed clothes
a Goodwill vinyl
early morning with limbs like old tires wrapped
if i could be Jimmy Stewart. I would.

in my imaginary past
he held me
with sharp elbows and bare knuckles

i am so comfortable

how will i survive
knowing you are in heaven
waiting for me to make a mistake

Please don't **** her
it's written backwards on my hand, my six year old wrists and my eyes that have been stung by spray paint i turned into a angsty manifesto
panting like a dog
begging you to stay
begging

you were a walking nightmare
i need to evict you from my dreams

every mall, every antique store, every show, every high school reunion, every time I was dripping in glitter and perfume

leave my hometown and gravy heart alone...
the way you would get so angry when I couldn't be perfect.

i am constantly trying to throw away costumes of myself when people float away
when they vanish
on the 9th when you are the seventh
satin blue
with the bow
it's just brick and sawdust now.

I lost my soul.
Somewhere between Atlantic City and Wildwood, NJ.
The salt still lingers in my hair, eyelashes, and tears.
The moons changing cycle as we eat candy on the beach and chase our childhood memories away
Creating tiny drawers to stash away keepsakes and overdue dreams
You pet me like a long lost lover with a fragile hand
Brushing out my knots and curls before we continue to share our sparkle